How do you force yourself to take action???

serpx · 2019-09-27T18:17:33+00:00

I know how you feel, I’ve been crippled with anxiety on approaching strangers. I’ve learned that I have to start small. I’m just complimenting people right now, just to gain COMFORT in initiating anything with people. From there, I can go into conversations, then getting numbers and stuff

notalwaysyourfriend · 2019-09-28T02:17:39+00:00

Alright bud, the similar situation here with me. Broke up with my ex 2 years ago, and I am now a copy of you. I don't have many male friends (0), but do have female friends from college that I will occasionally go out with. I am good looking and will get looks from girls, but also will end up not doing anything because I'm always with someone and it doesn't feel like I need it at the moment. A day later, I usually regret not coming up to someone.

Unlike you, I've had sex here and there after my break up. To be exact, I had 4 hookups with someone I didn't know, and two with someone from the past. To be honest with you, hookups don't cut it. You will read about it in this sub, but IMO they just are not worth it. I'm horny as shit at my 23, have a steady job, my own place but the hook ups don't make me happy. I've been wanting to find a girl, but became so picky about their looks, lifestyles and characters so I decided that I will probs just die alone.

Don't live for the bitches. Find a hobby and live for yourself. Grab a beer and enjoy your Friday night ALONE. Fuck everyone. Good luck man.

ThyaBrandus · 2019-09-27T18:22:09+00:00

Same thing for me dude. Definitely a goal of line to start approaching more women in person. I’m 32. I’m glad you’re learning this stuff younger than I am. Start reading books and continuing to be stronger and gauge your progress. I know you can do it.

Keep_the_Beard · 2019-09-27T19:35:42+00:00

My dude, your attitude is the only thing holding you back. Whatever you tell yourself you can’t do is what you limit yourself to. This advice applies to approaching women, but you shouldn’t be concerned with that until you work on your mental health. There is no one solution, but here are some suggestions:

Talk to close friends and family (or cut them out of your life if they’re making you feel this way). You’ll be amazed how much talking about your problems helps even if you don’t feel any closer to a concrete solution.

Create routines and habits that will give you a sense of accomplishment even on your worst days. Don’t rely on motivation to complete these. Instead, treat them as non-optional like brushing your teeth.

Get out of your own head, and stop letting yourself think that you deserve to be miserable. Find days in your schedule to travel or do something you’ve always wanted to do.

I would take almost a solid year to improve your mental state before even thinking about a potential relationship. I know that seems like a long time, but focus on one area at a time. You’ll still have bad days, but you’ll be strong enough to handle them.

Lastly, remember you’re only in your 20’s. You have plenty of life left to find someone. Women at your age will come and go. They’re not an instant cure for depression or suicidal thoughts, but they can supplement a stable, healthy, interesting lifestyle.

Once you start bettering yourself, your progress will be reflected in how you approach women.

HagridAWPmaster · 2019-09-27T17:57:52+00:00

Similar boat, beginning working on a personal system involving KPIs don't give up hope let's figure it out together.

infinity1567 · 2019-09-27T20:39:07+00:00

I’ve been thinking about the same shit man, I’m so tired of not taking action but I just can’t force myself to make these approaches. Recently I’ve been asking myself , if someone put a gun to my head telling me to talk to that girl, would I do it? All of the time the answer is yes. I’ve been trying to fear the missed opportunities more each day instead of fearing the potential awkwardness in the approach, let’s see what happens lol

sanji_97 · 2019-09-27T19:34:55+00:00

Same boat as you bro (22), I don't any moves even though I get looks. I recently been reading the book of pook ( I think that's what it's called) and will slowly start hitting on women.

andrewskins23 · 2019-09-27T20:50:03+00:00

Dude first of all it’s ok!

andrewskins23 · 2019-09-27T20:50:56+00:00

Next step: get a Tinder profile and just start telling girls they’re beautiful. That always works for me. Don’t give up just keep trying and you’ll find her 💪

Street_Creddi7 · 2019-09-27T21:06:50+00:00

If someone told you “be confident” what does it mean to you? Do you actually know how to be confident? Do you think you can pull off that “confidence” somewhere, somehow, anytime you wish?

Packie1990 · 2019-09-27T21:47:19+00:00

Your only 20 years old. Get really good at something, its the best way to build confidence and it can cross over into other areas of your life.

notathr0waway1 · 2019-09-27T21:49:20+00:00

Yeah, just start saying hi to the people that you're standing in line with at the store, for example. Or just examine other people as you're there watch their movement queue off of them. Is one of them buried in her phone? Is somebody bored and looking around?

You start to learn and practice these behaviors in low-risk social situations like this, then move your way up to bars or parties or whatever.

aka-thereal · 2019-09-27T23:56:47+00:00

you should stop worrying about it in terms of how you are with women, you should instead see it as necessity to improve yourself physically but more importantly, mentally. self-improvement in every aspect of your life. that should be your focus. not women. let that come when it’s supposed to.

Lon4reddit · 2019-09-28T15:08:48+00:00

By promising yourself not to be frozen or not move ever again, it works wonder with me, I don't want to disappoint myself because after all you have to live with your decisions and a bad decision is better than not at all, in this topic at least

Title	How do you force yourself to take action???
Author	bigawgie
Upvotes	39
Comments	19
Date	September 27, 2019 5:17 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/da3ijt/how_do_you_force_yourself_to_take_action/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-you-force-yourself-to-take-action.1479781 https://theredarchive.com/post/1479781

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