How to be the man in a relationship

fitzzpleasure · 2014-12-11T14:24:36+00:00

Yea you're behaving like a pussy. My guess is you never had a strong male figure in your life to look up to, but don't worry it's never too late to change.

She doesn't want you to control her, she wants you to lead her, take charge. Man up and make decisions and take action. She thinks you're too sensitive because you gush all of your feelings onto her like shes your emotional tampon. No, Just No.

"She tells me to do things and I do them." ... "She gets upset easily"...

Pathetic little permission boys like yourself don't make girls wet. Girls want men who go after what they want. Nothing soaks her panties more than a man who takes charge.

Strong, Confident, Independent, Leader, Takes Action, these are the traits that girls want in men. Permission Seeking, Worrisome, these are not. StarwaysCongress suggested some good books to read to help you.

Sorry for the tough love but I think you need to hear it. Also, chances are you're gonna end up breaking up with this girl because she will forever remember and bring out the old ("current") "you", as you attempt to reform yourself into the man you want to be.

StarwaysCongress · 2014-12-11T06:23:12+00:00

The Manual by W. Anton will save your life.

Supplement that with The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle and The Way of the Superior Man by David Deida and you'll be unplugged permanently from your pussy self.

Read books man. It's your only shot.

thedonsmithy · 2014-12-11T14:31:58+00:00

Hey dude, from my own experience of this, my advice is to just stand up for yourself on every occasion. No one told me this when I was young but I learnt the hard way and from friends that "Women love Drama". As men we like things to be simple, we just want to do our thing, relax at the end of an evening, if everything is chilled and calm then we are happy and everything is fine for us. In this situation women will stir things up, they do it with their friends too not just relationships. They want their own personal soap opera, it's not enough to be content with the status quo. They want a roller-coaster, highs and lows, and arguments and for you to stand up to them, followed by makeup sex. Like me and many of us, we just want a quiet life, and it is so much easier to do what she wants, we think "just agree and she'll shut up", that is not what they wanted when they started the argument.

That doesn't mean just argue for the sake of it, but if you know she is wrong or being unreasonable tell her off, don't let her get away with so much. If you have stuff you want to do or need to do, get it done. It seems logical to put her needs first in every situation, which is what a nice guy like you does, but that can wait till married life. Until then don't forget to look out for yourself and your interests. It's too easy to fall in to a trap of bad relationship behaviour. Also make more of the decisions, just say "right tonight we are going here and doing this, be ready by this time". Women feel like they have enough to deal with on a date regarding hair, makeup, clothes, so when you say "what do you want to do?" Fuck that, you should already have a plan where you are going, that's your responsibility, now do this and you'll man up.

empowwwerio · 2014-12-11T13:20:48+00:00

It's not about controlling her. Being the 'man' in a relationship means that she wants you to take care of her, protect her. Not the opposite!

If you are sensitive there is not wrong about that. But you should try to control your emotions. If you don't, she'll see you as a weak guy and you will just become less and less attractive by her eyes.

smegma_enthusiast · 2014-12-12T02:38:29+00:00

its okay to say no. People love hearing the word no.

No I'm doing this instead of that. "No i dont want to eat there, Im going to eat here, and if you want to come along I hope you do." No I dont like it when you do that. Do it this way, not that way.

I dont think there is anything wrong with acquiescing. But it is important to understand that standing for what you want, or what you believe in is attractive.

Look case in point; girls love stubborn guys, even if the guy is wrong or offbase. Its human interaction. wishy washy is unattractive. Stubborn is better (not in the long run though, obviously)

I would assume, with this girl, that she wants you to be more aggressive physically.

DikembeNONONO · 2014-12-12T04:45:45+00:00

She tells you to do things? Don't do it if you truly don't want to or if it's not a part of who you are

and man up physically. Make the move when you guys make out next time, finger her or some shit! Stop taking it slow physically. You waiting on her to make the moves is why she feels like the man in the relationship. Guaranteed.

RRjr · 2014-12-11T07:14:31+00:00

How old are you?

Serious question.

masterrod · 2014-12-11T14:57:23+00:00

I don't know how to be a man in a relationship. My girl tells me that I'm too sensitive and she wants me to be the man. I don't know what she means.

Guess what, she doesn't' know either.

She tells me to do things, and I do them. I'm not trying to be whipped, or anything. But when I do something that she doesn't like, she gets upset easily. We haven't had sex yet, or bj or nothing.

Do you tell her to do anything? Is she really upset or does she just want you to "convince" her do something. Are you afraid of her being upset?

We haven't had sex yet, or bj or nothing. I'm taking it slow with her, but am I taking it too slow?

You need to fuck her to worry about this stuff. Unless you are religious.

themanofthebay · 2014-12-12T06:25:23+00:00

How is she "your girl" if you never had sex with her or even bj?

Mex_beaner · 2014-12-12T18:08:43+00:00

at this point your relation is doomed. I had this problem back in high school, and never let this happened again. learn from your mistakes and next time don't be so needy. girls like guys whom primarily worry about them self and do their own thing.

2014-12-11T09:51:46+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	How to be the man in a relationship
Author	Latte4ever
Upvotes	44
Comments	27
Date	December 11, 2014 4:45 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/2oxy6h/how_to_be_the_man_in_a_relationship/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-be-the-man-in-a-relationship.1380762 https://theredarchive.com/post/1380762

Comments