How to stop self victimizing yourself after rejection?

jacksonvilles · 2019-06-24T21:07:41+00:00

What helped me not take HARSH rejection personally (like rude rejections that can happen at night, especially where i live!) was going out with wings who actually approach a tonne and watch them get brutal rejections! It makes you realise ''Hey, it's not just me!! I'm not doing anything 'wrong'! My approach isn't weird or whatever. It's just the way it is!''

Fact is, unless you are her physical type AND she's a social girl AND in a good mood or whatever, you're gonna get rejected. Sometimes harshly! You need the perfect storm.

prior to finding them wings, i'd only ever really approached with a male model looking wing who could bang any girl he opened and basically never got rejected lol. Gave me a warped view of things and made me think I must be doing something 'wrong'!

warm_theory · 2019-06-24T21:11:38+00:00

This is one of the reasons why one should work on himself and lay a strong foundation of confidence and non-neediness before going all in with approaching.

First you have to realize you'll inevitably get rejected by women at some point. Maybe your approach wasn't the best, maybe she really does have a boyfriend, maybe it just wasn't the best time to do it. All in all, keep in mind that it's most likely not your fault that she rejected you. By the way - not being her type is not a flaw, it's a matter of taste.

Rationalize this concept and realize that self-victimizing is a trait of needy, insecure men. You know these kind of men repel women, don't be one. And although some may tell you to go out and get rejected until you're numb about it, I'd advise you to insted work on those thoughts/emotions for a while. Some people flood themselves with approaching and can't deal with great amounts of rejections, then what? You're losing confidence with your approaches and it shows = leading to more rejections. It's such a negative loop. Meditate, exercise, eat healthy, have good sleep patterns, socialize more, invest in hobbies and culture.. All these things add up to a more grounded and confident personality overall. Also, maybe writting about those insecure/negative emotions could help you - reading things from an outsider perspective can be really helpfull.

Good luck

lesntoomy · 2019-06-25T00:29:51+00:00

The best way to do that is get into daygame and have lots of women so it wont matter

Raven-OA_ · 2019-06-25T06:59:36+00:00

Rejection is painful and can cause insecurities within. It happens to all of us. I guess the best thing to do is try to know it isn’t you. It’s just not what that other person wanted when it comes down to it. Could have been any guy she left.... Even if she ends up in another relationship. I’m sure she will do the same to him. Also, stop being the victim. Easier said then done as I’m going through the same ordeal. Been rejected in every way possible. It’s the shittiest feeling in the world. Just trying to accept the fact that he just isn’t into me the way I thought and is unavailable. I had a guy ask me to dinner which threw me off. I’m not over my previous relationship at all. Just feels like an eternity of emptiness and sadness right now. I tried to work it out but I get shut down. It happens to girls all the same, not just men. It doesn’t matter if you’re attractive or not. Guys have told me I’m gorgeous but they always end up hurting me somehow or the other. However it’s easier for me to think about the good things which is what you should try to do. Focusing on only the bad is only going to do just that, make you feel bad! Not saying the bad doesn’t catch up on you at times. But it’s better then obsessing about the rejection and bad stuff in the past. It’ll only hinder you from moving forward. You’ll stay stuck...

BaronBurgers · 2019-06-24T20:44:38+00:00

It's hard and I'm still learning to fully emotionally detach from rejection and others judging me. but, nobody never gets rejected. Rejection is not a concept personal to you.

disciplinedFreedom · 2019-06-24T20:59:40+00:00

Genuinely believe that everyone likes you, and if they don’t, that is their problem and they are missing out. You should almost feel bad for them

Title	How to stop self victimizing yourself after rejection?
Author	bwoidem
Upvotes	8
Comments	6
Date	June 24, 2019 7:43 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/c4uajw/how_to_stop_self_victimizing_yourself_after/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-stop-self-victimizing-yourself-after.1472105 https://theredarchive.com/post/1472105

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