Even up to 3 weeks ago, I thought that this material didn't work for everyone. Roughly 8 years ago, I began this journey of self improvement to become an attractive man to women. I read so many books, guides, and tried so many programs without success. I tried so many different styles to see if it was the way I presented myself. And goodness knows how many times I posted on here and other advice subreddits begging for answers. One look though my post history will show that.

This journey led me though some of the darkest periods of my life, at times even suicidal, because I convinced myself that I was too hideously ugly to date. Even after finally working up the nerve to post my pictures and having multiple people telling me that my only issue was the crappy necklace I had on, I still was able to convince myself that I was photogenic and if they saw me in real life they would still gag if they held my eyes for too long.

The fact is that the brain desperately needs to find a reason, an excuse, on why you're failing a goal. After I first began failing at meeting women, I latched onto an commenter on /r/amiugly (this was 6 years ago roughly and not the post on this account) who told me that I was ugly and told me that I would really need to lower my standards to meet someone.

Once the seed was planted, my brain found all the other evidence needed on its own. It twisted people's words into confirming I'm ugly. Every rejection was proof. Hell even the times I decided not to approach were also additional proof, convincing myself of non-existent repulsive looks.

For me, I was only finally able to break the spell using MDMA at a concert. (I'm not trying to advocate for drug usage, but only sharing to illustrate a point.) I found myself outside in the smokers area talking to everyone, and realized after some time that I wasn't getting the reactions I always thought I did.

Without intending to, I was opening 2, 3, and 4 sets. Then I got a phone number without any effort from a girl I'd deem completely out of my league. Then I had a near model follow me around the show for a bit. Finally I found a girl who I was just drawn to. After talking for a bit, we went back inside, and when she was going to find her friends, I grabbed her hand without asking and had her lead me to them. Then we danced for the remainder of the concert.

Her friend knew my friend luckily, so we went to a bar afterwards and continued talking. Then our friends left, so we went to a 24/7 diner. Then to her place, something I thought was an impossibility 24 hours earlier.

The next morning, there was no scream from her waking up next to a monster. Only cuddletalk and one hell of a hangover. I've already seen her since, and have future plans as well.

Part of me wanted to think this was a fluke, but I could also feel something shift.

Later that week at a meetup I attend, I began talking up a blonde that was fairly attractive. I could feel though that my teases were more organic than previously, because I knew if I was rejected I still was going to see the girl from the other night. At the end of the meetup, I asked for her phone number and got it. Hell, she even asked me out to sushi after not texting her for a couple days.

The point of this all is this: whatever you think the reason is that you're struggling is very likely not nearly as bad as you think it is, and these excuses will hurt you more than you can possibly know if you give them credence. Take this from someone who suffered for years before realizing this. I'll probably always have emotional scarring from how low I thought of myself, and there is no reason you should do the same to yourself.

You ARE good enough. No rejection should ever tell you otherwise, or you are just playing into the pitfall of your brain's excuses. There is nothing worse than thinking you're a forever alone failure, where you'll just dig yourself deeper and deeper.

I wish I had more practical advice to give, but I hope this can inspire someone, as I know of very, very few people who have tried this as long as I have without success. No matter what, there can be light at the end of the tunnel if you keep on pushing. Please keep trying.

(Note: Do not let any substance be a crutch for you. Though MDMA removed my insecurities, I did not take it for that reason, nor do I plan on using it for dating in the future. I won't deny it's helpfulness though for seeing yourself as you truly are though)

TL;DR Thought I was too ugly to date after 8 years of self improvement and practically 0 success. One night changed it all for me, and it can for you. Don't give up.