The way I see it masculinity shouldn't be a complicated topic. It has only gotten mixed up within the last 10000 years (this isn't long on an evolutionary timescale) as western society has diverged from its hunter gatherer past.

The best way to look at it is from an evolutionary perspective. What did women do before birth control? They got pregnant, had kids and raised them. Of course they did other tasks like gathering food, cooking, making clothes and gossiping but their primary purpose in life was to get pregnant and raise children.

So what does this mean for men?

Women looked for qualities in men that allowed them to focus on their children. This means a guy who could give food, skins, shelter, tools, protection and alliances.

So men would've been strong, confident, socialized, purposeful and handy.

I said this shouldn't be a complicated topic at the beginning because these traits were essentially guaranteed in a man since his role in society was already decided at birth (be a hunter). Of course there would be variance in competence between men based on genetic differences. This is in stark construct with today's western society where there is so much freedom to choose your own path. Before there was no option to be some antisocial computer nerd who works at McDonalds. In our minds these types of men are total liabilities to our tribe and should be avoided at ALL costs.

So to me a good baseline for what a man should be is someone who has a clear purpose in life, takes action on it and is rewarded both socially and financially for his efforts.

Another way this is complicated by society is that social and financial reward have been separated from someone's work. In the past if you provided a lot of meat you would not only have access to financial resources but you would be known socially as well. Today you can be a wealthy accountant and have zero friends.

There were no celebrities, actors or superstar DJs. The best hunters would get the most admiration from the tribe. Celebrity culture has hacked the human social hierarchy perception to extremes unprecedented in history (maybe monarchies can compare?).

So where does this leave us in the modern world?

If you're just looking for a wife and to settle down it would probably be best to get a job at a company with a hierarchical structure. You climb the hierarchy, get financial reward and social reward (within the company at least).

If you're looking for a wide access to beautiful women it's probably best to learn game and manipulate all these built in female expectations to the fullest extent possible.