Trouble getting the second date

JacobMoogberg69 · 2021-09-25T07:11:53+00:00

This is very easy. You became more interested in her than she was in you. All the hand holding, too much kissing, we should do it again, it was great handing out with you texts, etc. we take these as super positive signs, but I believe women look at this and go "well, this guy was easy, I "got" him without doing any work" and poof any attraction evaporates because you are no longer a challenge.

Next time, kiss sparingly, don't hold hands, you are not bf and gf and cut out the "I love hanging out with you let's do it again" texts. If she asks if she can see you again, be a little mysterious and say "we'll talk about it".

I know I'm gonna catch a lot of flak from the female crowd and the "if you like each other you should be full in" crowd, but trust me, holding back during the first few dates is totally worth it.

As a matter of fact, if this happens often to you, try to end the date on a high note. Let's say you make out a little bit, then pull back, talk. Then say you have a previous commitment and need to go, but that you enjoyed spending time in her company. And split. Leave her wanting more instead of giving up all the goods early on.

Pine-Fern · 2021-09-25T04:19:43+00:00

I had the same problem. I’d go on lots of dates with really cool women, we’d make out/fool around on the date, and then I wouldn’t get a second date. They’d either ghost me or hit me with the “I had a nice time but I don’t see this going anywhere.” From what I gathered, the big issue was neediness on my part. I’d want to kiss them too much or I’d compliment them too much. That’s not to say you shouldn’t be nice to the girl, but you also shouldn’t make it seem like she’s the first pretty girl you’ve ever been with. I started doing much better when I wasn’t throwing myself all over them or talking about how pretty I thought they were. Maybe it’s the same for you

goflyakitemom · 2021-09-25T06:19:23+00:00

How long ago did this date happen? Sounds like a great date to me!!! Sounds like she really is just busy. I don't repeatedly make out with people that I'm not interested in or text them afterwards.

Pull back a bit, though. If you don't hear from her in a few days, ask her how her trip is going or whatever. If she doesn't respond then, I'd move on and pursue other opportunities.

NiNj4_C0W5L4Pr · 2021-09-25T13:22:08+00:00

No simmering. No push-pull.

CompetitionFair7686 · 2021-09-25T17:44:07+00:00

Dont show so much interest in texts. It’s ok to text her the next day but don’t act like you want to meet yo just say something funny and forget.

IGetBoredSometimes23 · 2021-09-25T10:15:55+00:00

She wanted to sleep with you.

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news my good man, but based on what you said, she was putting out some very loud signals that she wanted you to stick your hot dog in her bun, and you blew it by not pulling the trigger.

You had a very good date and you did everything right up until the end.

Now she's moving so she has no reason to keep things going. She's probably not interested in a long distance relationship.

If she's still in town, might as well go for broke and ask her if she's dtf. You have nothing to lose at this point, and she might be cool with a one time thing before she moves off to parts unknown. Best of luck to you.

TheSunshineMan · 2021-09-25T14:40:44+00:00

Sounds like your dates were in public..

Two huge things you're doing wrong..

Having dates in public.

And making out and kissing in public.. save this for a place you can have sex - your place.

Otherwise you'll only kill attraction.

You also seem super needy.

You really need to be meeting these girls at your place for the first date and having sex on the first meet.

This is by far the best way to secure a second meet.

Title	Trouble getting the second date
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	11
Comments	16
Date	September 25, 2021 4:01 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/puz81f/trouble_getting_the_second_date/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/trouble-getting-the-second-date.1275574 https://theredarchive.com/post/1275574

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