We all know that we perform better in nearly all situations when we are relaxed as opposed to feeling uptight, stressed, or strained. There seems to be a delicate balance between relaxation and arousal in order for optimal performance to be achieved.

As I'm sure that many of you are already aware, talking to women is largely about being in the present moment with them, and communicating from there. While many of us are concerned as to how we are coming off and what technique we are employing, all of this amounts to nothing if we are not in contact with the fluid energies that make up interactions. In order for us to be present with the moment, we need to be properly relaxed and alert, at the same time. How do we achieve this state?

In my experience, there are a variety of techniques that help me to relax, but meditation seems to be the best. If you are unfamiliar with the technique of mindfulness of breathing, there are myriad sources for you to explore both in books and through the internet. My personal recommendation is anything by Chogyam Trungpa. I like his "Mindfulness in Action." The point is to learn how to develop relaxation and then to transfer that skill into situations where relaxation will help you improve your performance.

I hope this helps some of you who are aspiring to have better relationships,

In peace,

M