DAE feel like FDS reset them?

LevelTurbulent · 2020-08-29T06:28:15+00:00

I'm going through hell with a horrible divorce after 20 years of marriage. That's when I found this place.

This has been the most supportive group of women I've ever encountered. I'm so grateful for this group's existence.

You ladies are helping me more than you can imagine. I was seriously considering eating a bullet before I found this place. Thank you all.

marysia94 · 2020-08-29T14:33:12+00:00

Yes. I feel like I’ve finally broken my chains. The other thing I feel is a kind of restlessness. I feel like my life is slipping through my fingers and I’m desperate to get out there and live, but for myself. I want to go sailing and go out drinking and lift weights every day and read all night. It’s not a bad feeling, it’s just the ache of carpe diem. I have to live for me and no one else. Lockdown is definitely exacerbating this feeling too lol

AverageToHot · 2020-08-29T15:13:09+00:00

Yes! After my last breakup, I’ve been feeling this freedom more acutely. No more stress anymore, I can do whatever I want. I don’t have to please a man anymore and try to fit within his ideals. I recovered from the breakup relatively quickly and I just feel so happy. That aching need to be with someone isn’t there anymore. I’ve learned and grown so much and I’m in a happy place now where I have control of my happiness. I no longer feel like I have to settle for subpar behavior so I don’t have to be alone. Now, I’d rather be alone than be with someone who makes me anxious.

I’m truly at peace now.

kantarra · 2020-08-29T11:33:51+00:00

Very much so! I've never been that interested in dating to begin with and usually only dated if someone that I found interesting happened to find me interesting as well. Those relationships invariably turned to shit because I used to be a classic "nice" girl, and am very generous with my time, effort and everything. Never got even half of what I invested back. If my stocks perform this badly, I sell... and after finding FDS, I finally realised why I wasn't happy in my relationships. Always knew something wasn't right, but I couldn't give it a name. Dumped the LVM I was dating and although I miss him sometimes, I feel much happier overall. No more living a lie or accepting less than. I focus on myself, my pets, my friends and my family. I work on my business idea, have tons of time for hobbies and don't waste any of it entertaining men that are not worth it. It's really been an eye-opener, finding this sub. I don't feel shame for my old ways- I just didn't know any better. I'm seriously so glad I stumbled across this sub... I feel happy and free. Maybe I will meet some HVM at some point, maybe not- it's going to be fine either way 🙂

Merryprankstress · 2020-08-29T19:00:53+00:00

I am new to this subreddit but let me tell you it immediately changed my life and my perspective on so many of the relationships I've had and it's made me realize I have a lot of mommy issues I need to work through.

Primary-Alarm · 2020-08-29T18:17:17+00:00

Yyeess. I took a year long break from dating and all my weird middle school interests have come back in full force. And this time I'm not ashamed of them. Kid me had good taste.

Mindeska · 2020-08-30T11:22:55+00:00

100% yes.

I cannot believe the hours of my life I've wasted on dating apps and texting LVM. Writing paragraphs to men trying to explain why they hurt me, trying to explain what I needed from them. When I realised I just didn't need to do that, the sense of freedom was profound.

I can now focus on ME and doing things that make ME happy. I can learn new skills, consume content that helps me and advances me as a person, I'm free to go and live wherever I want to without having to convince someone to come with me, or do some stressful long distance shit.

The idea that women need men is the biggest con ever sold. I can be a single woman and still have sex, if I want to, for free, and with a really good looking man. If I want to have kids, it's far easier for me to do that as a single woman as it is for a single man. I can pay for my own apartment and fill it with things I love, and it will always be clean and just the way I like it.

I used to fear loneliness and now I embrace it. I'm going to enjoy the day at home on my own, probably listening to a German documentary to improve my language skills, while I put away summer clothes and get out nice cosy autumn ones. Probably cook a risotto for dinner while sipping white wine and then do some research on the city I'm considering moving to, with a hot chocolate. Why would I want to be stressing out about OLD when I can do this?

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Title	DAE feel like FDS reset them?
Author	Orphanedpinkpetals
Upvotes	133
Comments	13
Date	August 29, 2020 4:45 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/iimixt/dae_feel_like_fds_reset_them/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/dae-feel-like-fds-reset-them.170223 https://theredarchive.com/post/170223

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