One of the things often mentioned about married or taken life is that people tend to let themselves go, especially after having children.

Not just physically, but financially, and in terms of personal growth. Getting comfortable and having a sense of security can make you complacent, until you remember that even HVM can inexplicably do a 180 and turn low value after years of consistent good behavior. An alcohol, severe porn, gambling or drug addiction, or an affair could come out of nowhere and send your world crashing down.

Instead of being anxious that this might be an eventuality, keep a growth and readiness mindset. Have a backup plan for your finances, and an emergency fund. Keep sound financial habits, multiple streams of income and your own bank account. Stay fit and healthy. Cultivate independence, self reliance and love for self. Encourage independence and critical thought in your kids if any. Learn new hobbies and professional skills every so often. Have people who can support you close by in case of an emergency.

This doesn’t necessarily mean having a pessimistic outlook, but we’ve all heard the stories of women being blindsided by longtime loyal husbands and partners they thought high value. Life is a marathon and the best thing we can do as women is keep ourselves in race ready shape.