What do you do in response to a blatant 'no' when asked/told to do something?

It's intended as a challenge, or a shit test. I get that much. I've just yet to figure out an adequate response.

It's rarely done with serious consequence, just inconvenience. For example, a request to give more room in the bed. A request for sexual things may be met with a 'no'. Etc.

If it can be solved physically, I do. The more room request can be solved by physically moving her. The issue is where I can't 'get my way' like that.

Principle-wise, it's a lack of outcome independence. If it's a request made of her, power to refuse is given. Sure, I can fulfil the request myself, but that's still visibly giving in. Do I show annoyance? Seem utterly unperturbed by the refusal or what?

If I seem annoyed and then go off in a huff to do it myself, it's giving her power over me. If I do it myself without protest, she'll learn that if she refuses I'll just lie down like a doormat.

One option is to stop requesting things entirely. On one hand, it's outcome independence, but on the other it's giving up before even starting and still doesn't get me what I want.

I'm thinking dread is involved somehow, but I'm having difficulty applying it. Do I make the connection between the refusal and the dread known? Is dread cognitive behavioural therapy, where it's clear that you're punishing, or is it more a passive effect that drives commitment and makes her more likely to want to please?

Actually, yeah. That latter one seems like the right answer. Lift more, improve and she'll try to please and be less likely to risk you leaving. I'm working on that front. For the present, I'm left with the issue of handling these shit tests.