TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

dodged_that_one Archive

View 0 posts and 304 comments by dodged_that_one on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

Take the other girl and have a fun night with her. If the first girl is there talk to her too, but make sure you keep it within what's reasonable depending on whether it's a date or just hanging out with the first girl. Drop the mentality of making a girl jealous. If she's jealous, that's on her. You're living your life and having fun with people you enjoy being with. If she wants to be part of that or wants more, that's great. If not, that's ok too. See the distinction? It's unattractive and an…
/r/seduction12/06/26 08:38 PM
8

It can be jealousy or it can be fear of missing out. If a woman knows you like her then you're a safe bet and she can see if she can do better. If she sees other women interested then not only is it a demonstration of social value, but you're no longer a safe bet any more and it forces her to get off the fence.
/r/seduction08/06/26 09:51 PM
1

hi how are you? This outfit makes you look really sophisticated.’ What's someone supposed to do with that? I've said similar things to people as a compliment in passing with zero intent of further interaction because it was true and I wanted to lift their day. The most someone can do is say, "Thanks," because there's basically nowhere else to go and that's a dead end. You'll do better asking them a question. Ask them for advice about something, like if they can recommend any drinks. Don't come s…
/r/seduction07/06/26 08:26 PM
10

Girls smell your insecurity BEFORE you open your mouth That's why I wear copious amounts of Sex Panther.
/r/seduction31/05/26 04:15 PM
1

The problem with the tactic is that it's a facade. It's a more advanced version of using canned lines and tricks. A girl who likes you for them initially will find you boring and unattractive once you run out of them. The connection being built is between her and you + the AI, not her and you, so she's going to be confused and disappointed when it's just you and her. Think of it like this. You scored points by being fake-you who knew about the same obscure sci-fi. Now you have a knowledge debt t…
/r/seduction19/04/26 10:29 AM
2

Weird salsa class. Almost always you have to swap partners every couple of minutes and it's great experience for trying to rapidly build rapport. When I was on form a couple of nights I had three or four girls looking over to see how many guys they had to dance with before they got back to me - and they noticed one another noticing. Massive confidence boost. Dancing is fun too.
/r/seduction16/03/26 11:47 PM
2

You're working on making yourself look very high-value externally (and maybe high-maintenance), but what you want is someone who wants you for who you are. If anyone is going to approach you, it's going to be to buy what you're selling and you're selling your looks, designer brands etc. Tone it down. You need to look attractive, but also obtainable since you are looking to get obtained! The danger is that you're coming across as vain, shallow and too much work. Who will you be in a relationship?…
/r/seduction18/01/26 08:00 PM
4

With an attitude like that, self-respect is the only kind you're ever going to have and that's misplaced. She's playing games and not worth your time. You don't respect women and she's dodging a bullet if you ignore her. It's win-win.
/r/seduction02/01/26 05:20 AM
3

This is good advice about your outlook on life in general and will have a knock-on effect of making these stories come naturally. The key word is IMAGINATION. It is literally transformative. If you have a rich imaginative world it's so much more fun and positive than our normal one. If you can bring someone into it, they'll love it. If they start building it with you, they'll love you. I remember when I was very small my imagination was vivid. It was like I could properly experience whatever pla…
/r/seduction13/09/25 11:22 AM
1

TIL. Thanks
/r/seduction23/01/25 11:31 PM
1

Not seen this before. What's it mean?
/r/seduction22/01/25 11:05 PM
58

Ever catch yourself thinking: “I don’t want to fuck this up”, “I hope i don’t say something wrong”… If that’s your mindset you are already fucking up. It's even more fundamental than that. If you're thinking those thoughts, you're doing what's known as "self-monitoring". That means that not only is your brain thinking about what's happening and how to react as it should, but it's also running analyses on how things are going and giving you anxiety about whether things are gong well or not. That …
/r/seduction19/01/25 01:42 PM
1

Only if they see that you're trying to make them jealous. If they see a guy who is welcomed like a long lost friend and the girl(s) you're with are having a great time then they'll want a piece of that action. Social Proof will give them evidence for all the things they usually have to cautiously discover themselves and they'll be much more open to you than some random.
/r/seduction24/09/24 09:08 PM
2

I wouldn't say "turned on". It increases their interest in you, but it's not going to make them want to jump into bed with you. Look up "social proof". Basically if they see a girl who they think is like them (who who they wish they were like) with you then they can use it as a shortcut, checking boxes that you're safe, interesting, attractive etc. There's also the fact that if someone else is with you then you're a scarce resource and instantly more attractive. I remember at after work drinks I…
/r/seduction24/09/24 09:02 PM
1

Some girls do like bad guys because they're broken themselves or they want the drama, but what most arseholes have in common is confidence. Being an arsehole means upsetting a lot of people and not caring and it's that common feature that is what gets them and decent guys women because it leads to clear communication and the confidence itself is a highly valued feature. Being manipulative can mean different things. It can mean leading a woman to feel and think in certain ways to enhance your att…
/r/seduction07/09/23 05:12 PM
1

In much the same way as you overcame the fear of falling off your bike.
/r/seduction02/06/22 09:19 PM
2

Lucky that neither of us judge books by their covers.
/r/seduction27/05/22 02:15 AM
2

Depends how much they like other girls.
/r/seduction23/04/22 04:48 PM
2

Sounds like girls who like games and drama for validation. You're being a good guy, not a "nice guy". A "nice guy" would get upset because they would feel that they are playing their part and the girl had gone off-script with a rejection, when their entitled to whatever was going to come next. These girls probably aren't worth your time, but if you don't want to walk away immediately, have something to say like, "You were right to slow things down, I'm not sure I'm that serious about you yet." T…
/r/seduction23/04/22 03:57 PM
1

You're right, "just be yourself" is about being confident and relaxed in yourself. As for the rest, find out some of the things that girls you like are interested in. Some of it will me the most mindless shit imaginable, but there will be some things which will spark your interest. Research that and talk about that, don't try and get them into your more nerdy things unless they are already interested. Fitness is good and dancing is brilliant.
/r/seduction24/03/22 07:17 PM
1

Unless it's something like Love Island, I can find a subject interesting because it interests the other person. Finding out why they relate to it and participating in their enjoyment can be enough, even if you don't care about the subject itself.
/r/seduction20/03/22 12:27 AM
2

"Sorry, I was culling my weak braincells with alcohol before our date and it was their final wish, what could I do?"
/r/seduction19/03/22 07:13 PM
26

hot girls have hot friends And this is what we call marketing.
/r/seduction08/03/22 07:41 PM
4

It worked for Bob Dylan :)
/r/seduction07/03/22 01:22 PM
17

Games are designed so it's possible to win. Women, not so much.
/r/seduction25/02/22 05:57 PM
13

I'm sorry if you are afflicted with one or both of those, but those are edge cases. An author giving advice has to aim for the broadest audience in the area he's chosen. Someone with those legitimate issues probably needs to seek specific advice about those and then think about how to adapt the advice in a more mainstream text to be appropriate for their position. It doesn't render the advice unusable to everyone because it doesn't cover every possible eventuality, nor does it make it useless to…
/r/seduction23/02/22 02:02 AM
11

It was rammed home to me that I needed to treat women as special, with respect etc etc. That served to put barriers up in my communication with them that others, who treated them as everyone else, didn't have. Same goes for making sex a big thing rather than fun. It's meant I've put too much pressure on my interactions and relationships which has not helped.
/r/seduction20/02/22 06:57 PM
1

Women give the dating advice which would work if they were the people they wished they were. The problem is, women have an idealised view of themselves, so while they are being truthful, their advice is shitty.
/r/seduction20/02/22 04:50 PM
1

If you don't like her any more, don't do anything. She must have liked it that you didn't hassle her after you tried the fake number and that was enough info for her to decide you weren't a psycho. Too bad she missed her window, not a good habit if they have a drive-thru.
/r/seduction16/02/22 11:07 PM
5

HI, do you know Jane? Excellent, so glad you're here, we're getting to know one another, tell me five things I need to know about her. This: Avoids confrontation and keeps things positive by dodging the question Makes him look like a douche for interrupting and killing the mood and that isn't relieved by you joining him on the project by answering Appears inclusive and sociable Sets quite a high bar for him to meet the challenge, so he's likely to flounder on point four or five which will make h…
/r/seduction14/02/22 11:49 PM
6

You need to find out how serious the "warnings" were. If it's that you are a serial-dater and are always with one girl or another, that can act as excellent marketing. If it's that you might be a serial-killer, that's not such good PR, but some girls might be into that, not going to judge. That a few of them sent "Are you ok?" texts is concerning. That suggests they've formed a bad opinion about you and are all probably reinforcing it with one another as bit of deliciously dark drama. You need t…
/r/seduction07/02/22 01:04 AM
1

Lucky people get into virtuous circles of trying things, getting mostly positive feedback and trying a variation, mostly subconsciously. The ones who don't learn this stuff, there are a many reasons why and this isn't an evening for essays.
/r/seduction28/01/22 07:13 PM
7

It's not first date material, best somewhere public for her comfort for that. However after you've proved your not-a-serial-killer credentials, absolutely. I'd go a bit further though. Cook something that requires some light preparation and get her to do some. Telling her to chop things, stir things and moving around the kitchen together sets up a great dynamic, all the while you're drinking, tasting things and sharing opinions about the food as well as chitchat.
/r/seduction22/01/22 11:47 PM
13

Sounds like the girl sees you as a backup plan. Not one that she'd ever use, but it's emotionally comforting to know she's got you wrapped around her finger. Another girl showing interest raises your value, perhaps she made a mistake, it becomes more important that you remain a potential option - even though she still doesn't intend to take it.
/r/seduction19/01/22 07:58 PM
1

I agree, he put it plainly in the first note that he was attracted to her and wanted to talk. If she'd have pulled the bf card then, that would have been that, any further conversation would have been dead on arrival. When all you have in common is that one has been rejected by the other, that's game over. As intelligent, social creatures, we should be aspiring to more than that in our interactions. By not shutting him down right away she created the space for something more meaningful. She didn…
/r/seduction09/01/22 10:10 AM
1

There's basically no common ground with what happened an your analogy. He was doing his thing and chose to use her as a distraction in the hopes a random encounter might turn into something. In a lot of these comments there is an assumption that it is her responsibility to maximise his face time with available women. She doesn't owe him anything beyond common courtesy. If he's being entertaining and they're enjoying one another's company, that is sufficient reward in itself. It isn't some kind o…
/r/seduction08/01/22 07:34 PM
1

Thank you for your contribution.
/r/seduction02/01/22 11:50 PM
69

Reminds me of a friend who had swiped some straws from a bar. Somehow we got separated and I saw him outside offering a puzzled girl a straw. I walked up to him and put on a show of being excited that he had straws and asked if I could have some and was really grateful for a couple. The girl was now confused as hell, but she knew she wanted some straws. My work was done.
/r/seduction02/01/22 02:01 PM
4

You're right that there is no teacher like experience, both actual flirting or something practical like improv. However, there is absolutely value in watching TV and performances with an analytical eye to see how humour is manufactured. Something simple like callbacks are amazing for building intimacy because suddenly you have an in-joke, something between just the two of you that no one else would get without explanation.
/r/seduction02/01/22 01:06 PM
53

If your angle is sitting in coffee shops with a laptop until an attractive girl sits at the next table, you're already not playing the percentage game and that isn't her fault. I read this as an opportunity dropped into his lap, it wasn't what he hoped for, but he made the most of it and they both enjoyed meeting one another. That's a win, not wasting time. He had stuff to do anyway and this was an opportunity / distraction, not some strategy. It was a shot to nothing, always worth taking.
/r/seduction31/12/21 03:49 PM
0

You can do a lot worse than allowing a girl to frame herself as the lead in a sweet romcom. Note that at no point does OP mention the guy's looks. People here are adding that themselves, writing themselves off as being able to fit the role and then being envious that they couldn't pull it off. They're rationalising why they shouldn't even try.
/r/seduction31/12/21 03:32 PM
5

I never count an unexpected and fun conversation a waste of time. If it's with an attractive woman, that's a bonus. If your only measure of value in an interaction is the potential progress towards a relationship or sex, you have a problem.
/r/seduction31/12/21 03:22 PM
7

They played some kids games and swapped some notes, that's hardly a big investment. You'd have to be pretty fragile to feel led on and butt-hurt from that unless the messages were very flirty, which is not suggested and the guy was happy to socialise with her for another 20 minutes, so it's doubtful that she misled him. If she'd led with shutting him down because she was in a relationship, they'd never have had a 20 minute chat which they both enjoyed. I'd prefer to live in a world where a good …
/r/seduction31/12/21 03:12 PM
2

She set the boundary and expectations before they got to talking, he respected that and they had a good talk. That's fine. The attitudes around here are a step short of saying that the hussy should be accompanied by a male family member at all times so she can't ensnare men. People are embracing the word "taken" too seriously. Enjoying the company of others is not infidelity, it's being a person.
/r/seduction31/12/21 02:08 PM
22

This sub: Why does approaching girls have to be so hard? Also this sub: If a guy approaches a girl in a relationship, she should eviscerate him or she's a slut.
/r/seduction31/12/21 01:43 PM
7

there should be some goal with every interaction Being sociable is sufficient. It's sad if you go about treating people as only as means to an end. All approaches are brave. It was the right approach for this girl who was happy to give him time even though she wasn't interested in taking things further. If her situation had been different, he'd have had a shot. The kind of approach you call brave would likely have had her leave the coffee shop.
/r/seduction31/12/21 01:34 PM
-2

Well done for making it a positive interaction. It's all too easy for a woman to be hurtful and dismissive for the high of a power-trip when a guy makes an approach they're not interested in. You were gracious and it sounds like you were rewarded with a good conversation which you both enjoyed. That is really healthy. Thanks for being one of the good ones.
/r/seduction31/12/21 01:24 PM
2

Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring extended edition. We too can shit-test.
/r/seduction24/12/21 04:42 PM
1

Likely one was a lesbian and the one you liked was bi. It must be tough when you've got to fend off both Mr and Ms Steal Yo' Girl.
/r/seduction05/12/21 09:12 PM
1

Life isn't a film, most girls who are in a serious, if woeful, relationship are not going to fall into your arms because you've shown real interest, on her way to be picked up by "her man". You've build rapport, demonstrated value and shown clear interest. It's a big change for her to break things off with a guy she presumably lives with for the opportunity and risk of someone else. She could avoid the risk by going behind his back until she's sure of you, but it speaks well of her that she didn…
/r/seduction04/11/21 04:56 PM
1

Don't discount the context. If a woman is in front of a camera with him, if they're a celebrity their career is on the line, if it's your average person, their entire social circle is going to see it; either way they are heavily invested in going with the flow and being responsive and flattered rather than offended. You can do something similar by asking them up front, "You look like you're adventurous, you are adventurous aren't you?" This sets an expectation, then anchors it with their agreeme…
/r/seduction12/10/21 07:35 PM
1

"Your absence was my constant companion." - Clever, if a bit needy "Yeah, I went out, but no one makes me laugh like you do." - Suggests she needs to keep your attention because you are looking.
/r/seduction04/10/21 02:37 AM
1

Right, I inferred too much from a couple of your initial points. Same goes though. As you've got to know her better, you've lost interest. Don't go into details because you don't want to ruin their friendship or drama. If they're worth anything as a friend they'll accept that and will keep being friendly. If not, you've rid yourself of a crush that wilted in the cold light of day and a friendship that was only superficial. They won't feel like it, but both are wins.
/r/seduction26/09/21 03:02 PM
2

Girls always get the benefit of the doubt and attractive girls get forgiven for a lot of sins before it hurts them socially. Take the high road. Tell your friend that you still want to be friends and you're not going to tell them who to be friends with or not. You can make a joke of the date with the girl, saying on the one hand it was a great date because you got to know her a lot better, on the other hand it made you sure you didn't want another. No, you won't go into details because you don't…
/r/seduction26/09/21 02:47 PM
3

Don't play a role in her drama. The thing about crushes is that they are not based on much actual information, but from an idealised perception of a person. Now you've seen her up close, she's not an attractive package and isn't worth your time and you should not let her influence your feelings, that's giving her power to which she is not entitled. The best thing you can do is ignore her and move on. It doesn't matter whether she led you on or not, she's not someone you want in your life. If you…
/r/seduction26/09/21 02:19 PM
1

Isn't there a very high marriage rate between doctors and doctors and doctors and nurses? There are some risks to dating co-workers, the main thing is not to shit on them. If you use them and move on, you'll get the reputation you deserve.
/r/seduction18/09/21 03:36 PM
1

From a psychological point of view, you completely nailed it with your timing and phrasing to maximise your chances.
/r/seduction13/09/21 07:53 PM
1

I'm hoping they come back soon, but dance classes. The ice is instantly broken because you're working together on an agreed goal, you've got a few minutes with a partner so you can have a chat and build rapport and if you're a regular you can build a bit of social capital with other people. You also don't have to worry about approach, breaking into groups or anything like that.
/r/seduction10/09/21 06:38 PM
1

I don't see that you can talk during the class, is there much of a window before / after?
/r/seduction10/09/21 05:52 PM
1

intelligent (enough) Wow.
/r/seduction10/09/21 05:50 PM
13

Nooo. Assume attraction and only take rejection as rejection. There is so much space for poor signals and misinterpretation giving up at the drop of a hat will leave you constantly moving on. Make your intentions clear and proceed until she has too, maybe even confirm with her so it's unequivocal, then move on without hurt or rancour if it's a "No".
/r/seduction22/08/21 06:19 PM
1

I don't think it's dishonest to be friends but to hold a torch. It's only unhealthy if the person gets oneism. If you do get rejected, I'd suggest some time and distance is needed to allow yourself to heal and the other person to come to terms with what was a blow to the friendship. Hopefully then you can return to being friends, even if it is on slightly redefined terms.
/r/seduction20/08/21 04:27 PM
6

I've seen a couple of videos of US pick-up guys. I'd guess an American swaggering up to a group of girls and talking shit would get laughed at pretty hard. If only they knew all they needed was a couple of litres of cider and some crisps and they'd come flocking.
/r/seduction17/08/21 12:08 AM
5

You have some confusing logic here. If they somehow qualify as remaining in your wider social circle, why would you avoid someone similar in the future? Either that kind of person is someone to avoid, so you should disconnect from them, or they aren't, in which case you shouldn't avoid similar. What is the benefit to you for keeping them? Keeping a stone in your shoe because you can bear the discomfort isn't strength, it's stupidity. I'm all for forgiving, but I also take out the trash, I won't …
/r/seduction14/08/21 07:13 PM
14

Either someone is worth your time or they are not. She isn't, so close the door. It is better revenge to show her how great your life is and that she's missing out by not being part of it, but it lowers you to think in those terms and perform for someone who might not even be watching. That is giving them power over you and your actions they don't deserve. Needing revenge is also weakness. It means you need something from them. The strong move is to move on. If you are weaker and need revenge (I…
/r/seduction14/08/21 04:14 PM
17

Well done. It is tough to turn off the tap when you care. I had a girl who I was only friends with start ghosting me. I didn't notice it at first, but when I did, I realised she was aggressively ghosting me, like walking up stairs to pass where I was on the floor above level ghosting. I still have no idea what led to that level of effort, I didn't think we were close enough for her to care enough to dislike me to that extent, nor can I think of anything I did to earn it. However, she did keep me…
/r/seduction14/08/21 03:30 PM
31

I'd add once you have seen some good results, let them speak for themselves. I was at a restaurant at the weekend and there was a couple on the next table having a date. He was talking quite loudly so I got every word whether I wanted to or not. He was wearing a tight white t-shirt which was painfully obvious to show off his pecs. He went on and on about his lifting progress, his diet, exercise regimen. The girl was your typical girl who was interested in cardio to keep in shape, but that was ab…
/r/seduction09/08/21 11:53 AM
2

Comet guys realise rejection doesn't actually hurt that much, especially because they've not invested anything of worth. They rock up, hit the target or crash and burn and move on after dusting themselves off, no big deal. Orbit guys are continually racking up costs of time and energy on the one girl which makes the prospect of rejection seem worse and worse (sunk-cost fallacy) and they avoid it by not doing anything which might cause it. Problem is, those are also the actions which might get th…
/r/seduction02/08/21 12:04 AM
2

The main thing is to take risks which might get you rejected. Nice guys orbit girls because they've been taught to give them space etc etc. That means that the girl doesn't ever have anything to accept or reject, just weak signals of interest and the guy just orbits getting frustrated, waiting for an invitation to land that will probably never arrive. You need to make your approach clear and she'll either give you the green light, or you'll crash and burn and can move on to someone who might be …
/r/seduction01/08/21 11:11 PM
1

Some girls have a problem where they really tense up, it's a medical condition and is neither her fault or yours. There are probably a few different issues which can cause the same issue, the one I've heard of is vaginismus. It is treatable with a combination of mental and physical exercises. If it is that, normal sex is going to be off the menu for some time. Be compassionate with her, she's going to think it's her fault and feel bad. This kind of thing can be caused by some very negative exper…
/r/seduction19/07/21 12:19 AM
9

One of those outstanding pieces of advice which become obvious once someone points it out.
/r/seduction11/07/21 05:51 PM
3

Yes, would helpful to know what they like him being honest about. I suspect it's not sharing information about that thing he's planning to see the doctor for.
/r/seduction11/06/21 05:43 PM
1

Turning women into pedestals is probably illegal.
/r/seduction11/06/21 05:29 PM
1

If you get pissy that easily, you've got more problems than being unimaginative about hobbies. If your interest is women, then joining a book club or learning how to dance or pottery is that interest, it just means that you have to do some reading or whatever that might not be 100% what you want. It's good practice because to have a decent relationship, you need to get used to doing things you don't 100% want. Look for something you don't actively hate that the kind of woman who you are interest…
/r/seduction10/06/21 08:23 PM
1

Yeah, it's too bad that our hobbies are assigned at birth. I'll check back later to see how you're doing - I've got my hot yoga class in a minute, then my jewellery-making class. My heart goes out to you bro, it must be tough.
/r/seduction10/06/21 07:48 PM
2

A reputable brand of sunscreen will give you equivalent or better "anti-aging". I'm not an expert of moisturising, but I'd guess it would be similarly effective.
/r/seduction29/05/21 07:37 PM
3

Women do all sorts of things to exfoliate. Guess what shaving does! We've got that in the bag for those of us who don't wear beards. Get some quality shaving soap though, it's nicer to use and makes you feel better too. As for moisturising cream, you can get most of the benefits from using sunscreen. Anti-aging on products literally means that it includes sunscreen to prevent UV damage. Sunscreen is UV protection and a moisturiser, only reason to look elsewhere is scent.
/r/seduction29/05/21 07:34 PM
13

Yeah, lowering your standards for numbers is kind of the antithesis of what this sub ought to be about. The goal ought to be being better and presenting better.
/r/seduction09/05/21 03:04 PM
4

I'd agree that "Beta" isn't helpful, we don't have those kind of social structures. "Nice guys" has some more value. As I said in another post, people fall into the trap of following the lie that if they act as society tells them (which leads to being over-generous and passive, at best making you a doormat, at worst, coming across as a needy creep), that leads them to feeling entitled and bitter because they feel they've held up their end of the deal, but where are the women?! That's an unhealth…
/r/seduction05/05/21 12:46 PM
3

Remember that everyone watches everyone in the dance lesson. You can get a lot of kudos from the women by being the woman when you're forced to dance with a guy. Play to the audience make a big deal of embracing it, then talk to them about your new shared perspective.
/r/seduction02/05/21 12:17 PM
2

I was doing salsa and it was great, then Covid destroyed it. Hoping it'll come back in a few months. With learning to dance, you're both terrible at it, so it's an instant ice-breaker, you're changing partners every 3 minutes or so, so there's no pressure, attention is more on the mutual goal of performing the mini-routine and you're face to face and touching, which is already breaking down barriers. Also, everyone gets to see you with everyone else. You get to build great social capital with ot…
/r/seduction02/05/21 12:08 PM
26

The dedication of a disturbed person to their cause cannot be underestimated.
/r/seduction01/05/21 01:01 PM
2

People who are overly nice in the way you describe are almost always low status. It's a self-fulfilling prophesy. People who have low social status are overly nice to ingratiate themselves. However, people mistake being overly nice as evidence for having low social status. Appearance is reality, so being overly nice leads you to have low social status. I realised this some time ago and stopped doing the spontaneously nice things for people that I used to do, those little things which cost you no…
/r/seduction01/05/21 11:11 AM
20

I see it more as society tells us we should act one way and be "nice", but the world rewards you for not acting in that way, at least part of the time. Nice guys believe in the Just World Hypothesis; if they act as they society tells them, they will earn a cookie, or sex, or maybe it's sex with a cookie, I don't know, I don't want to judge. However, women often don't reward that behaviour, so those guys get frustrated and feel cheated when they feel they have played by the rules and have nothing…
/r/seduction01/05/21 01:07 AM
1

That would give you some time to manoeuvre, but I'd have thought you're locked in because "I've done you, now you do me." The lady is always going to want you to hit the mark of guessing three to five years less than her actual age. Any closer and she looks her age, she doesn't feel good about herself and is disappointed. Any further away and it looks like you're low-balling. Say she's older...you might not make it out alive.
/r/seduction30/04/21 04:50 PM
3

Yes, he knew his audience, there was no reporting line between them and what he said could have been interpreted as completely innocuous, he let her mind go there. If he had made a terrible misjudgement, I think the worst he'd have faced would be an uncomfortable conversation and the incident being used as the first point in trying to establish a pattern of unprofessional innuendo. As it was, all that happened was the girl in question got a bit flushed, big respect for her confident response and…
/r/seduction30/04/21 01:20 AM
18

You might like this then. I heard a co-worker use it in our office once, he was an amazing flirt. He's talking to a girl about work and she tells him what she needs. He replies to confirm, "So you want xyz?" "Yes, that's right," she replies. "And do you always get what you want?" Eye contact and smile. You could have cut the tension with a knife. To her credit, she played it dead cool, looked him square in the eye and said, "Yes, yes I do." I'll always remember it as a way to suddenly completely…
/r/seduction29/04/21 11:01 PM
75

Avoid talking about age with women. NEVER play the age guessing game, it's very difficult to pull a win out of that situation. Initiating the age guessing game?!? That's hitting self-destruct. "For your age" is a phrase which is going to shoot any rapport you've built up in the head. Even if you instantly retract by saying you were only joking, it's probably done irreparable damage. If you find a woman asks you to guess her age, deflect with "You like playing games?" with a smile and lots of eye…
/r/seduction29/04/21 08:27 PM
1

Ha! I didn't even mean dating, just winding up!
/r/seduction14/04/21 09:10 PM
2

I remember having an English teacher who was a staunch feminist. She wasn't extreme extreme, but was very sensitive to indications of patriarchal social norms like having doors opened for her and she'd rail against it a bit in classes. Then she got a bf and suddenly men were great! Most women are feminists, but not extreme, because all they're after is equality and respect, which really isn't asking much. Personally, I think of relationships as partnerships. I'll play to my strengths and submit …
/r/seduction11/04/21 08:00 PM
2

Real people I'm afraid, so very much "you had to be there". Check out The Moth. This is an organisation set up for telling stories. People spend a lot of time crafting their stories and practising performing them before doing one of these. I don't know the site well, but it's the best I can think of offhand as an example. There are a lot of clever devices used in these to keep people's attention like setting up for a big reveal and then going off on a tangent leaving the listener hanging before …
/r/seduction23/03/21 10:10 PM
1

True, Gandhi never missed the opportunity to drop a nuke.
/r/seduction23/03/21 12:04 AM
28

The best conversationalists I know take people on a roller-coaster of emotions, overwhelmingly positive, but briefly dipping into something negative for contrast and either moving straight back to happy or dismissing the negativity as a joke / false trail. They'll inject lots of energy and modulate tone, volume and speed - like how people talk to young children, but not quite as exaggerated. It's obviously a performance, but a kind of honest one that is on their terms, they're not being being so…
/r/seduction23/03/21 12:01 AM
8

I stopped doing spontaneously nice things for friends because even though I didn't expect anything back, they held it against me that they perceived they'd involuntarily incurred a debt I recognise now that it also lowered my social standing because people reasoned that if I was thinking of others all the time and putting my self out, it must be because I was inferior and needed to do so in order to make up the ground. It's sad that that's how people think. I used to be a better person, now I'm …
/r/seduction17/03/21 11:47 PM
5

You make some good points and the people elsewhere in the thread being reductionist also have a point. I'd like to add that it isn't just humour, it's storytelling. Women, like everyone, like to be made to feel things. If you make a girl feel happy, excited, sad, expectant, relaxed, surprised, tense etc they're going to want more. That kind of emotional roller-coaster while all the time feeling safe is insanely attractive. It helps if you've got Rule 1 and 2 nailed too, as women rate you as funn…
/r/seduction30/01/21 11:36 PM
3

Doing anything about it is a great way to get fired. You can show that you're interested, but one unwanted phone number on a receipt is going to be a warning at best. Keep things verbal, lots of eye contact, indirect compliments only. Due to your precarious position, unless you don't care about your job, show that you're interested, but go no further unless they give clear signals.
/r/seduction22/12/20 12:47 AM
2

It's almost as if women are real people who think and have their own volition and sense of self-worth! There is something odd about some people here with being very transactional, so I can see how they'd leap to the prostitution conclusion. The other week I said that if you offer to help a girl, ask for something in return so she doesn't think you're putting her in your debt for which you'll demand sex as payment. Right away there was someone thinking that the thing to ask for in return could be…
/r/seduction25/11/20 12:01 AM
2

The sad part is u can do everything right, invest a lot That isn't necessarily doing everything right. Investments need to matched. If you've invested a lot and she hasn't, she is free to leave on a whim because there's nothing there for her to work to save if she has what she thinks is a better offer come along.
/r/seduction24/11/20 11:44 PM
4

I guess I left room for misunderstanding. By "in exchange for something", I didn't mean anything sexual. The absolute opposite. Asking for something is to balance the scales to make it absolutely clear that you are not after sex as payment / reward. In the past, I didn't see that I was building up what the other person saw as debt. For me, taking opportunities to do nice things for a friend was part of being a friend. I'd do something and not give it another thought. Apparently for her, it was s…
/r/seduction10/11/20 08:10 PM
23

It's worse than that. Even if you have zero expectation or interest in someone and you do them favours, they'll assume that you have an ulterior motive. I was brought up to look for ways to help people and had that misinterpreted as creepy affection-seeking behaviour when on a few occasions there were instances where it cost me nothing to do something for someone. I listen to what people say and retain a lot of it, especially quirky little details. Remembering those and acting on them has been i…
/r/seduction10/11/20 06:16 PM
1

To a large degree, we're all shallow. Let's get that out of the way. We're genetically programmed to want to mate with people we see as having good genes. The obvious expression of good genes is physical attractiveness. Women want to have relationships with men who will give them healthy, attractive children - even if they're not looking for that right now. Average is ok. WIth work you can improve on that in terms of fitness, dress, money etc. Then you need to think about engaging with women in …
/r/seduction08/11/20 07:42 PM
2

It's this kind of refinement that makes this sub so useful. I wasn't going to mention this one since it's a bit advanced for OP, but since we're sharing pro tips, here you go. Tell her that she's looking great and is a "solid seven" dressed up like that and as a man of discernment, you don't go lower than a seven. Now, make her feel even better about herself by whipping out our phone, going on Tinder and criticizing the girls on there in comparison to her. If you do see someone very hot, obvious…
/r/seduction07/10/20 01:24 AM
3

An excellent answer. I would add two more areas of conversation. Girls like to know that you care. While talking about your past, ensure you talk extensively about previous girlfriends and how deeply in love with them you were. You don't want to come across as a failure in those relationships, so put extra emphasis on how they collapsed due to them, e.g. how they'd never do as they were told, kept wearing the wrong clothes, went out with friends instead of focusing on the relationship and how th…
/r/seduction07/10/20 01:06 AM
15

Perhaps Invested vs Non-invested might be better. The only reason to feel vengeful is if you've put something on the line and not got something back - usually your ego. For others it might be that they've bought gifts, dinner etc, so have made a financial investment. What's missing is the realisation is that your investment does not require reciprocation and it should not be implied that it does. What's the solution? Value and invest appropriately for the stage of the relationship. Getting rejec…
/r/seduction05/07/20 02:23 PM
3

Why? Did you still order two coffees?
/r/seduction31/01/20 01:01 AM
9

I mean, everyone has to fail to succeed You can fail without a massive cringe factor. It's always going to be a bit awkward getting rejected, but trying repeatedly to storm the enemy lines with nothing but a wet fish is only going to get you shot down. Getting up again and having another run is pathetic, not "alpha". It's like judo, you'd expect someone experienced to know how to fall when they're thrown. Everyone is going to get thrown. This guy who claims to be an expert, gets thrown and break…
/r/seduction23/01/20 10:46 PM
1

That does sound like a (late) lunch date, but call it what you will, doesn't matter.
/r/seduction24/08/19 04:13 PM
2

It's not late enough to be a dinner date so falls into the previous category. It's an awkward time. Traditionally, it would be "afternoon tea", too late for lunch, about the right time for a snack, too early for dinner. Having a long sit-down meal at 4pm would be unusual.
/r/seduction24/08/19 03:44 PM
1

It is, but it's a lunch date which is more friendly than romantic. Be prepared for her to ask, "Is this a date?" at some point. I might suggest, "No, it's an audition. Next Friday, 8pm at... is the callback. How do you think you're doing? Do you think you're going to make the cut?"
/r/seduction24/08/19 03:10 PM
1

It clicked for me when I was taking dancing lessons (something I'll get back to asap). You tend to swap partners every few minutes and you see guys going through the motions with plain/unattractive girls or older women and suddenly be trying to impress attractive partners. I decided to treat whoever was in front of me as my perfect partner, the only one in the room and try to get her to smile. It made a huge difference. All of the women were warmer towards me, smiling and moving quickly from the…
/r/seduction23/08/19 09:51 PM
13

It shouldn't be about acting. Be friendly and great with everyone. Pay her less attention as a consequence of paying more attention to other people, not because you're upset with her and punishing her. You should be able to enjoy her company and have fun even if she's turned you down - if you don't recognise that she's got more than one thing to offer then that might be part of your problem. I know trying to impress people you're not actively pursuing is a pointless game. Well, that's a load of …
/r/seduction23/08/19 10:59 AM
9

They stop giving a shit. If you say something stupid to a girl and ruin your chances, there's always another girl. Knowing there is always another girl means you can go into every interaction knowing that worst case scenario, you've learned what not to do or say next time and you'll do better. That way every interaction is going to end positively for you, even if she storms off because at the end of the day, you've got nothing riding on her emotional state or opinion of you.
/r/seduction17/08/19 09:31 PM
229

Congratulations, that sounds wonderful. What pieces advice did you put into practice? Is there anything in particular that you think had a strong effect?
/r/seduction16/08/19 05:30 PM
1

Richard Curtis is the writer of British romcoms like Four Weddings and a Funeral and Love Actually. He always has gestures like holding multiple signs up professing love or apologising.
/r/seduction08/08/19 11:45 AM
1

Sounds like you could test whether a Richard Curtis style approach works in reality
/r/seduction08/08/19 11:27 AM
1

That's extrapolating from just one data point. It could be that he's in the lucky position to have found an attractive, generous girl. Either way, I agree that some people here would be thrilled to be in the position of the guy in the post :)
/r/seduction22/07/19 12:10 AM
0

Obviously no way to know for sure without seeing the pics, so please DM at your convenience. Seriously, I don't think it is likely to have been meant as an insult. What has he got to gain from it? He wants the benefits. While not meant as an insult, you have been insulted and understandably so. There's nothing wrong with strippers, but they make their money by being objectified and he's done that to you. You don't have to be cool with that. Plus there is the rest of the baggage the society has l…
/r/seduction21/07/19 11:13 PM
28

Good counter on the height, but you slew her with the age comeback. She sounds like someone to have fun with until it's not fun. Enjoy the games.
/r/seduction17/07/19 06:16 PM
7

People often see what they want to and when normal, happy, teasing behaviour from you would actually be an indication of interest if coming from someone else, you can see why guys might be bound for disappointment (that's absolutely not a reason to modify your behaviour!!) As for coming on strong, it comes down to where you draw the line. To me, a girl saying that she'd like to grab coffee sometime isn't coming on strong. People who do not clearly communicate their interest severely limit their …
/r/seduction27/06/19 05:09 PM
15

It's funny all of the etiquette and general rules we invent for ourselves, especially when it comes to something that carries emotional risk like dating. Telling a guy that you're interested isn't coming on strong and you're more likely to get what you want than passively hoping that he'll pick up on artfully constructed hints. I know that I can be a blunt instrument at times and can miss anything other than a neon sight with an arrow saying "Come talk to me."
/r/seduction27/06/19 04:51 PM
1

"Nice breakfast. Come over and help me cook dinner tonight at 7. We can fix this "lonely" problem."
/r/seduction18/05/19 06:04 PM
1

Don't apologise. Smile and nod to acknowledge that you know that she knows and leave it at that. If the situation demands you say something, tell her whatever she's wearing suits her. Looking isn't a crime. Pretending that you weren't looking will make you look creepy.
/r/seduction18/05/19 02:38 PM
1

Exaggerated descriptions of what the other person supposedly wants you to do to him really play to the audience, as they're entertaining and show that you're not entirely serious. I'm not sure I'd use the approach with someone who is actually gay, it's a risky move.
/r/seduction04/05/19 03:25 PM
8

"For the last time, stop coming on to me, I'm not interested. I will not give it to you up the ass." Loudly. Then take every response as confirmation. If he tries to deny it, claim tell him there's no need to be defensive, it's ok to feel that way, he just needs to find someone else who will bend him over a table. When he says he's not being defensive, say that's proof that he's being defensive and it's ok, there's bound to be someone who'll full-fill [intentional spelling there] him - again and…
/r/seduction04/05/19 01:49 PM
1

I suspected you were hinting at this kind of depth when you drew the distinction, you are truly a woman worthy of the title. Thank you for taking the time to share.
/r/seduction29/04/19 09:26 PM
1

It's a shame that that instinctive filter will steer you away from nine decent guys who are a bit unsure of themselves for every one genuine creep. Maybe avoiding that guy is worth the loss though! I'm interested about the distinction you made. What was it that made you decide that you're a woman, not a girl and not both? How has that changed your outlook on guys and life in general?
/r/seduction27/04/19 09:54 PM
15

The label is usually earned by having low confidence, being physically unattractive and/or escalating inappropriately. Having low-self confidence often manifests as you not communicating effectively. If you don't communicate effectively girls don't know your intentions. If girls don't know your intentions they think you're concealing something. If they think you're concealing something, it's probably bad. If they think you're concealing something bad, it makes them uncomfortable. If you make the…
/r/seduction26/04/19 04:02 PM
6

My afternoons are much more relaxed so I'd be much more likely to entertain unproductive interactions later in the day. I'd imagine it's similar for most people, you've worked through your essential tasks, motivation might be starting to flag and a distraction is welcome. What kind of opening would you use? You're busy at your computer, girl sits two tables over, just out easy speaking distance. What do you do?
/r/seduction22/04/19 02:43 PM
7

You shouldn't be driving back after drinks and don't let her take a taxi alone. Also, find some excuse as you talk to her. You should be finding out about her and her interests, ask to see some of whatever she does or is interested in. All you're doing is saying "Here is a non-sexual reason to invite me back to your place so we can have sex." It doesn't need to be a great excuse, just a way to keep things implicit.
/r/seduction09/12/18 03:04 PM
6

Well, it's up to both of you. You need to both make your intentions clear, but do it euphemistically so she can accept without having to say "I want you to come home and have sex with me," because girls are either too shy/inhibited for that and/or don't want to make themselves feel slutty. It needs to "just happen" when you happened to be there out of the most pure motives.
/r/seduction09/12/18 02:37 PM
12

Walk her home / make sure she gets home safely etc are kind of code, then see if she invites you in.
/r/seduction09/12/18 01:01 PM
1

Your level of confidence seems to be something that has a basic level and then is modified by your mood and things like your perception of outcomes. People tend to increase their basic level by going to the gym and improving themselves and improve their mood by wearing nice clothes. However, from reading this sub, many many people try to change their perception of outcomes, either pretending to themselves that rejection is not a possibility, keeping thing utterly short-termist and not considerin…
/r/seduction04/12/18 02:08 PM
10

Two things. The key "alpha" trait is confidence. Being able to fearlessly approach someone you don't know and giving them the opportunity to judge your value as a person as insufficient, without caring if that is the outcome is where people want to get to. Secondly, they're generally trying to sell themselves to you, not women. You pay their bills and they think you want to be the leader of the pack. Their customers may buy that, while many of the women they approach will not.
/r/seduction23/11/18 01:56 PM
8

Canned stories are, but being able to condense a real life experience into a 30 second exaggerated, expressive anecdote on the fly is very attractive. Best to start working on a single story to understand how to craft it, not to learn by rote.
/r/seduction04/11/18 02:30 AM
1

She's awesome.
/r/seduction31/10/18 05:27 PM
0

The appearance of confidence. If you're nervous they'll pick up on it and start speculating why you're nervous and that'll lead to conclusions that you are not being sincere, worried about being found out and creepy. Women want to know where they stand, that's one of the main appeals of what people describe as being "alpha". Most of that is BS pseudo-science. What's important is that someone who is like that is being sincere in their communication of intentions - even if they are joking and bein…
/r/seduction08/10/18 07:08 PM
1

"I've never seen a woman look as goddam sexy as you look right now." ...as she's stood at the sink doing the dishes.
/r/seduction28/09/18 04:29 PM
2

Depends on the girl. I knew one who found it absolutely hilarious to be teased about being short. If you make it clear that you find it an endearing and cute attribute at the same time, it's more likely to be taken well. Like others say, it's risky to tease someone about their essential attributes, they may have been picked on at school for it and you don't want to be drawing a line between those experiences and you (also as a decent human being, you don't want to dredge that up for them).
/r/seduction16/09/18 06:29 PM
6

Wishing her luck sounds like a polite "fuck off then" to me. Cancelling was the right move, but I'd have said that I wanted to spend time with her, not her friend, which gives her more space for coming back with a suggestion that is just the two of you.
/r/seduction08/09/18 01:14 AM
1

Oh right. No problem at all then. Yeah, go for it and aim to make a connection with the one that worked before and get her number.
/r/seduction02/09/18 02:54 AM
1

If you're going to ask them both out, do it to a mixed gathering, so it's not just you and the two of them, then work on getting the other one's number. That's the safest option. The high risk strategy is tough to write. You'd make the first feel valued, then ask for the second one's number because there was something you talked to her about that you want to follow up on.
/r/seduction02/09/18 02:35 AM
1

I've only known two sets of twins and a pair of girls who were so close they might as well have been. If they are super-close, for invitations to social events, treat them as a unit, in person treat them absolutely as individuals. In this case, I'd initially wait a day to see if you do get a response. If you don't, then you've got nothing to lose and I'd go for a risky strategy. There's lots of advice about sending a chasing text. Consider the most risky strategy of asking twin 1 for twin 2's nu…
/r/seduction02/09/18 02:15 AM
24

Humans judge attractiveness on a relative scale. You're going to struggle if you are seen as the ugly duckling. You either need to find a way to address the balance or find opportunities outside that social environment.
/r/seduction02/09/18 02:02 AM
1

Like with any interaction, you may not be out of the game just because you've not heard back yet and there are plenty of ways you can reach out without sounding too thirsty. Twins are difficult because they are super-close and are used to be being treated as a unit (and there is the fantasy thing), but they are also fiercely individualistic at times as a reaction to that. Makes it a minefield.
/r/seduction02/09/18 01:57 AM
3

Just don't tread racial lines. If you're using racial humour to pick up a girl you're either going to get a strong negative response, or a racist. If they're a racist, unless it's an Indian chick, she's going to be racist towards you! Is the fish you really want to catch an a racist Indian? With the bait you're using, that's the only type I can see that might bite.
/r/seduction02/09/18 01:41 AM
2

Could be that the "wrong" one wasn't interested enough. Twins know that every guy they ever meet is going to have the fantasy of having them both at the same time. The thought of getting intimate with their sister in the room, let along with their sister is off the charts gross to most of them. The "all 3 of us" may not have been good call. Twin 1 would have invited twin 2 if they are that close.
/r/seduction02/09/18 01:37 AM
4

I'm not saying that she might not understand it isn't escalation, but that she might not understand that it is an invitation, so qualitatively different. I'd be upset with a girl who wanted to dial it back after she'd done that. Got no time for that kind of teasing.
/r/seduction01/09/18 10:07 PM
10

It's pocket-rocket science! Girls don't know what it's like to have a dick, so don't know how delicate they need to be when climbing around and heavy petting. Also, it's good to be clear on lines and signals. If a girl is grinding on me, I take that as a very clear invitation for sex and any escalation from me should be taken as sealing the deal. Someone who is very inexperienced might think it merely feels nice and is being playful.
/r/seduction01/09/18 09:55 PM
124

You can if you want. He probably will. Moving off is ok. Staying is ok. Grinding is sending clear signals that you want to take things to the next level now. Don't do this unless you are willing to follow through.
/r/seduction01/09/18 08:43 PM
4

Best not to be xenophobic, it's not a good thing to be and will only be attractive to other people who have those views and who wants that? It seems like an especially weird strategy for an Indian in a mostly Caucasian country. It must be a pretty tiny demographic who would find both you and that approach appealing together. Work on improving yourself rather than PUA tricks. The tricks will generate a spark of interest, but you need something a little more substantial to turn it into a flame.
/r/seduction01/09/18 06:12 PM
7

No!! Cook together. If you are good and she is too, you get chemistry as you work together and share knowledge and mutual respect for skills. If she's rubbish, you can teach her something, girls like that. If you're rubbish, girls find it adorable that you try and will enjoy a bit of motherly teasing. If you're both rubbish, you can make an absolute disaster that tastes horrible. It will be a memorable experience and THEN you order out. That kind of shared experience is gold.
/r/seduction01/09/18 05:29 PM
10

This this and more this! Make sure you give her the fun and nice jobs, but also ones where she feels she makes a real contribution. "Stir this while I do everything else," or "Gut these fish while I prepare the salad," are not good ideas! Maybe do a stir-fry. You can both choose what to put in, both do the chopping and then you can start it off, then let her take over the pan while you grab soy sauce and spices to add. Letting her do a role that you started shows that you value and trust her to …
/r/seduction01/09/18 05:25 PM
2

I might be more savage. "Girls usually stop hitting on me once they know about you. This is a bit creepy, are you ok?"
/r/seduction01/09/18 05:10 PM
1

Stop there. You've made your point and kept it classy. Might be worth asking a couple of mates to quietly evict her if she decides to crash the party. You don't want to make it a confrontation between the two of you in front of all of your guests.
/r/seduction26/08/18 09:17 PM
1

I'd question whether she's a prize worth chasing. Before you do anything, think about the pros and cons. Are you just into her because she's there and seems open to advances, or because you really want to be with her? Availability is deceptively attractive on its own until the morning after! The thing about jokes is that we use them to go into dangerous territory and then come back to safety without too much risk. A lot of guys say something provocative - either sexual or teasing and then retrac…
/r/seduction29/07/18 10:49 PM
1

Generally girls show interest, guys escalate. No need to worry that nothing has happened. Most people who have commented think she's into you, I'd agree. It doesn't sound like you are close enough to be teasing you in the way she has for it to be friendly, so it's flirting. She expresses that through playful teasing, you need to mirror that and escalate to show that you are speaking the same language.
/r/seduction29/07/18 07:56 PM
1

For her to behave like you've said, you'd have to be so deep into the friend zone you aren't ever coming out, or she's attracted to you. You've not spent enough time with her to be 'zoned that much, so she's communicating in an awkward, immature way that she's attracted to you. If you're interested in her, mirror her actions and mess with her stuff a bit and then start to move it to a more mature and explicit level. Personally, I'd have my concerns about her maturity/craziness level from what yo…
/r/seduction29/07/18 06:12 PM
1

Women are nearly as shitty at communicating as men. She's doing the equivalent of pulling your hair and running away because she wants attention. Don't read too much into the location thing. It's more likely to be an overhang from childhood that boys really don't like being hit there and she's not made much progress in expressing herself since then. If that's the case, she might well do something similar again, so be ready with a "Don't do that! I need those!", to which you can almost guarantee …
/r/seduction29/07/18 01:55 PM
2

Sadly when girls are sexually aggressive, it's often not about you. A couple of times I've found that I was a prop and there was another guy or a girl who the bitch was trying to make jealous. After a minute it becomes clear that she is paying as much attention to you as someone else in the background and it's time to nope out. Sounds like your encounter was a less toxic version of that. Girls do like a bit of drama.
/r/seduction29/07/18 01:14 PM
2

Drunk girl nonsense. My guess is that Nina wanted some drama to gossip with the other two about as an explanation of the later interaction. Sara might genuinely have liked you a bit.
/r/seduction29/07/18 12:45 PM
6

Tension good. Pressure bad.
/r/seduction28/07/18 07:30 PM
2

Also, you may be able to teach her some moves as a couple. I have done a bit of dancing and girls LOVE that. She'll know all about gyrating seductively, but it may well be that she's never learned how to be led into a turn. Simply showing her the proper frame and leading her might be new to her and it just feels "right". A hint of aftershave might work well for you too if she's going to be close.
/r/seduction28/07/18 05:13 PM
2

You're a dancer and that's what she liked most of all, so make sure that where you're going is the kind of music that suits your style. If it doesn't, find out somewhere nearby that will work so you can invite her for a "proper dance" there. Same advice as elsewhere, be safe.
/r/seduction28/07/18 05:03 PM
5

Harsh, but fair.
/r/seduction23/07/18 08:35 PM
3

You have some solid points, but also there are some issues. Firstly, if you mention a scientific paper, cite it so people can read it. How does this help anyone? Some occupations and hobbies are more strongly linked with creepiness than others Also, people should always be suspicious of video. We all know that some are pure fakes, but let's ignore those. The real problem are the scenes that probably don't survive the car journey home, the approaches that are instantly met with "Fuck off creep!" …
/r/seduction23/07/18 08:23 PM
1

Ask a personal question. "What's that you're drinking?" "What did you mean by..."
/r/seduction22/07/18 04:00 PM
1

I obviously wasn't clear. Absolutely don't try to photobomb or get in on something she is already taking. The pic has to be a couples pic from the start. The key is to create opportunities for it. Also, if there is a shared friendship group, a couple a pics with her that OP posts might get the cooing validation from her friends that she wants and will push her to take some pics with him for those sweet sweet Likes.
/r/seduction22/07/18 02:36 PM
3

Anything you ever write, always look at the last couple of sentences. When you start out, you know what you want to say and are confident in it. At the end you tend to qualify and soften what came before and it is usually a bad idea, irrespective of the subject.
/r/seduction22/07/18 02:31 PM
3

if you want to keep this girl around you need to smother her with snaps, texts, inviting her to shit, meeting up with her and putting her on the pedestal. Nope. You need to be present, communicative and somewhat emotionally available. You're depicting an unbalanced relationship where one side is fawning over the other and that is unhealthy and isn't going to work.
/r/seduction22/07/18 02:14 PM
2

"You're right, we both need to put some more work in. I was looking at sex as validation for how far we've come together." Now it's her problem too, it's not just you "earning" it and there is the implication that she needs to do something to show her commitment.
/r/seduction22/07/18 02:00 PM
1

It's not a matter of creepiness. Giving her his number doesn't require anything from her and doesn't put any pressure on her. Asking for her number does because part of her job is to make customers happy and she is working, but this is a personal request which may make her want to disappoint the customer. It's unfair to create that conflict. Also, she has no real power to end the encounter, she can't leave her station. You shouldn't put someone in that position.
/r/seduction22/07/18 01:39 PM
6

This is the answer. However, it's also a useful insight into her. She wants validation, so make sure you give her some, but do it personally in a way that'll be more meaningful than a Like. Something like a kissing her out of nowhere and if she asks what that was for saying that she looked so great in those clothes and that light, you just had to kiss her. Also, try and get in on some of those selfies. Have some prop or something that will make her look good with you so that she can get some val…
/r/seduction22/07/18 01:31 PM
-3

Scratch her camera lens. No, don't scratch her camera lens. Yes, do it!
/r/seduction22/07/18 01:24 PM
1

Not to someone who is on the clock in a customer service role, it's unfair to put her in a position where she may want to decline when she's being paid to be nice to you.
/r/seduction22/07/18 01:20 PM
24

Concentrating on making friends who are girls rather than girl friends. If a popular girl runs up to you and gives you a hug in front of four other girls, it doesn't matter that she's with the guy of her dreams, you've just established social proof of your value as someone worth being with. You know what your problems are, you've identified them. You're shy. You can get over this by talking to everyone. It's a skill, you'll suck at first, but then get better at starting conversations from nowher…
/r/seduction22/07/18 12:57 PM
4

Seriously though, don't talk about memes. Memes are a social crutch for people who can't articulate their thoughts and emotions by doing 95% of the work for them by referencing an established concept. Women LOVE people who can express themselves, paint a picture with words and engage with their imagination.
/r/seduction22/07/18 12:36 PM
1

Mirror her mood and change yours to where you want her to go. If you've got some rapport, she'll follow.
/r/seduction21/07/18 08:58 PM
2

That's hilarious. You'd have to be a serious pussy not to return to a shop after a single interaction didn't go well. It might even work out. He'll have made an impression, shown interest and been nice. It might take a few hours for the weirdness to go away and for her to sort out her feelings, but she might come out of it thinking "Yey, guy gave me his number!" and enjoyed telling the story to people in the lunch room. At the very least, they now have a shared experience to build on. If you're …
/r/seduction21/07/18 08:41 PM
15

I'd say that there was too much of a rapport gap when you gave her the note. For her, you're just another product passing over her checkout. Think of the mental energy it would take to be genuinely interested and engaged with every customer. Once you walked away, you dropped out of her world. Then you come back. Very strange, people don't do that. Has she made a mistake with your bill? You give her your number. What's this?!? You were slightly more interesting than the other customers, but nothi…
/r/seduction21/07/18 08:26 PM
4

Luckily humans judge things on relative rather than absolute scales!
/r/seduction16/07/18 04:38 PM
7

True 99% of the time. If you get yourself to some dance classes so you can do more than move from foot to foot and grind, you can dominate on the dance floor because most guys are absolutely clueless. You need music which you can actually dance to, so cheese rather than "dance" music. Once you start spinning a girl around and changing holds every female eye is on you and they want a go being thrown around like that. You've demonstrated value, scarcity and that you'll show them a good time.
/r/seduction16/07/18 02:05 PM
152

All you're left with is a Hail Mary at that point. I invent their type for them and see if they'll engage. "Ah you're one of those girls who like breakdancing midgets. I got that vibe off you. You know, I could have done that, I nearly turned pro, but then there was the incident."
/r/seduction08/07/18 11:34 AM
1

What's right depends on you, the girl and the situation. What's right is what's appropriate and that's not a fixed answer.
/r/seduction08/07/18 10:08 AM
7

Thats what i did with my grandma Never say this again.
/r/seduction07/07/18 10:38 AM
1

9/10 times a firm touch is the way forward. It gets you to commit so you don't do the dreaded "floaty hand" and it exudes confidence. Knowing when and where comes with practice, but it's acceptable to do so surprisingly frequently as short taps in non-sensitive areas in a social situation.
/r/seduction07/07/18 10:28 AM
2

She can look quite attractive girl-next-door without make-up, but that just means that there's hope for everyone :) Emma Watson has a very teenage-boy looking cast to her face unless shot carefully which I find hard to find attractive.
/r/seduction06/07/18 09:54 PM
2

Lucky you, some great people to model. Then take those lessons and personas somewhere else. One guy suggested yoga, that's the kind of thing you need to be thinking of, a very female activity. Personally, I like traditional dance classes, you look like such a boss when you're leading two girls at once because there aren't enough men to go around and the teacher singles you out as one of the better men. That said, I don't go there to pick up girls. I go for self-improvement. You don't get to choo…
/r/seduction06/07/18 09:36 PM
2

It's the combination in this case. People are lazy about how they make decisions about value. Girls are very sensitive to social cues, especially when they're in female dominated environments, they're waaaay more political than men. The inequality of numbers means that there is going to be competition. Initially that will mean that girls will want to appear as more attractive so you will chase them rather than someone else. Once you add the social proof that you're fun and desirable you become s…
/r/seduction06/07/18 09:18 PM
3

You know that he isn't the guy who made one silly mistake or got caught up in a fantasy that came crashing down. Those are wrong, but you can find your way back because they're exceptional circumstances and trust isn't necessarily dead. Your guy sounds like he's going to cheat at every opportunity because he likes sex more than he likes you. That's a problem with him, not you. It's not your fault. What not to do. Don't trust your self-control. You still feel something for him, you'll let yoursel…
/r/seduction06/07/18 09:10 PM
1

Due to social restrictions, I believe that there is more emphasis on phones, so work on getting numbers and being lively at the text/phone game. Social norms have most opportunities sewn up, but modern tech is getting over that. Group chats might help with social proof a bit and get the girls talking about you away from that chat. To be honest, I'm grasping at straws a bit here. My knowledge is limited of the situation. Start where things are easiest, follow the threads you pick up there and try…
/r/seduction06/07/18 08:54 PM
2

Find out where Westerners go. There may not be alcohol, but more relaxed norms will make things easier. There will be adventurous people from the host country and that is your way into the local social scene to whatever extent it exists. Be careful and stay safe, families are often not chilled.
/r/seduction06/07/18 08:12 PM
3

Have fun and have zero expectations. Use the advice and frameworks as a way to get the ball rolling and to give you a bit of structure if you aren't naturally able to get things to flow, but don't be a slave to anything you've thought of and prepared before. It's the difference between knowing you need to head north east and are free to have fun and experiences as you go in that general direction and feverishly making sure that you're on the right road and looking at maps and signs every second.…
/r/seduction06/07/18 08:05 PM
1

Scarcity is your friend. Find a group activity with a 2:1 girl to guy ratio or better and get some social proof from even just a couple of girls and you'll suddenly look very attractive.
/r/seduction06/07/18 07:45 PM
1

In that case, disregard the last paragraph. What you need to address urgently is that certainly in your mind, having sex with you is a punishment and you're in danger of teaching her that too. That was partly why I was suggesting to defy expectations. You need to convince her that by losing, she actually won and get that negative mindset out of your head.
/r/seduction05/05/18 11:59 PM
1

Asking afterwards is a bit too late. If she's not getting into it then you either need to find out what you can do to make it better, carry on regardless, or stop. Carrying on might sound a bit harsh, but marriage is about give and take and no doubt there are times when you're not totally in the mood, but you go with it. It's still consensual, but you're taking one for the team. You should totally go ahead with sex today, but make it all about her. Spend a ridiculous amount of time on foreplay e…
/r/seduction05/05/18 06:05 PM
50

I advised a friend that dating a douche wasn't bright and she'd get hurt. She said she knew what she was doing and was having fun. He cheated on her and she got hurt. Said something similar to a girl who was acting slutty, she said she knew it was a mistake, but everyone has a right to make mistakes. Neither had any sympathy from me when things turned to shit. Most people do have a reasonable idea what they're doing and that long-term it isn't a good idea, but they keep going for the instant gra…
/r/seduction24/02/18 09:01 PM
5

If both know that you're not exclusive and seeing other girls, then it's unlikely to be a problem when they find out. What is likely to happen is that at that point they'll want you to go exclusive - a girl can entertain the idea that there might be another girl on the scene, but knowing who she is and it being a friend will be too much to take. You'll then be in the position of having to choose. The girl you don't choose may start hating you and the winner may hold ruining her friendship agains…
/r/seduction19/11/17 03:37 PM
2

If the banana is hanging around with assholes, you can get guilt by association. It's an extension of being well presented, but contextual rather than about essentials. If the bananas just happen to be there without a direct association, then the peach will look even better. A guy with asshole friends can be (and should be) a red flag to a girl.
/r/seduction11/09/17 06:25 PM
325

This requires sufficient introspection to understand whether you are the juiciest peach in the world. If you are, then all's good. Other options are: she's just had a peach and doesn't want another right away the peach isn't sufficiently well presented she isn't looking for a peach and the peach hasn't put her in the right frame of mind there are too many peaches on offer and this one hasn't stood out the peach is too discounted, there must be something wrong with it the friends she is with hate…
/r/seduction10/09/17 08:21 PM
1

Different situations require different approaches. If you can get a group of people absorbed and entertained by your story it demonstrates huge social value. In a one to one situation, if you can respond to their comment with a relevant, concise, funny anecdote of your own, that is also very attractive. There is a theory that our brains have seen such rapid development (in evolutionary time scales) because of sexual selection - the best storytellers got more action once the fire went out.
/r/seduction03/09/17 01:56 PM
1

If you've noticed it means you've got too much time on your hands.
/r/seduction27/08/17 09:20 PM
8

Walking around isn't too basic, but if you know where you're going to be, then do some research so you can "find" something cool, like a great coffee shop, or ice cream parlour or art gallery. One idea is an Exit (or Escape) Room. There are quite a few out there now. Working together to solve a puzzle totally takes the pressure off and you can get to familiarity and kino naturally.
/r/seduction27/08/17 07:44 PM
1

First, get a handle on your drinking. Don't get totally wasted, it makes you good to no one on the evening, you feel shitty the next day and it isn't good for your health. Generally a girl who is impressed by "this one time when I was drunk" stories is unlikely to be one that you want. All is certainly not lost with that girl. You've broken the ice and have a golden opportunity to show some vulnerability. When you talk to her again, late on through the conversation sincerely say that you weren't…
/r/seduction27/08/17 06:39 PM
12

Why not make it about him? It's not like we know Amber and he's trying to steal the limelight. This is supposed to be about self-improvement and by improving yourself you improve the world because you interact with it in a more positive manner. His actions probably wouldn't have made a difference, but a few people responding to what was in retrospect clearly someone reaching out to make a connection might have been enough to make her find some hope. Really it's not about him, but everyone. We ca…
/r/seduction22/08/17 09:56 PM
1

The mind doesn’t perceive negatives. That's clearly not the case. I refer you to this documentary.
/r/seduction01/04/17 08:56 PM
10

The first one was a surprise question that got her to instantly engage. The other two didn't give the girl much room for a response without a sudden mental change of gear. If coat-girl had been awesome, she might have shot back with "Da, my neem iz Svetlana, heev you ze meecrofeelm?" but without already being on that wavelength and imagination engaged, that was massively unlikely to happen. Treating her like a Russian spy might have engaged her, or might also have met an Iron Curtain. You've got…
/r/seduction22/03/17 02:50 PM
4

Depends what you think your response should be to "Dance monkey! Dance!" You're busy, you've got a full life. If she wants to be entertained she should call and see if she can come over.
/r/seduction28/02/17 09:12 PM
10

Radio silence. Do things you want to do to the exclusion of her. She's brought you down, you don't need things in life to bring you down. She's right and has done you a favour, learn from it. Let your change in behaviour be acknowledgement, don't say it explicitly, that's approval-seeking and being a needy bitch.
/r/seduction28/02/17 09:01 PM
11

I'd be worried if she didn't. Deleting them suggests an angry, resentful temper.
/r/seduction25/02/17 05:28 PM
1

Sounds like a stretch! Curious now.
/r/seduction18/02/17 10:03 PM
4

Not a fan of this one. Telling her your alternative plan is too much information which is a clear attempt to make her feel envious which is an indication of pettiness and insecurity on your part. Better to say "OK, thanks, I'll make other plans." That tells her that she's had her shot this time, a maybe isn't good enough, you've got other options and isn't trying to rub her nose in how much fun you'll be having.
/r/seduction16/01/17 09:17 PM
1

I can see that POV. Given you've had longer to think about it, what's your angle?
/r/seduction25/12/16 11:50 PM
1

I'm with you on this. I reckon there are some people feeling pretty low roaming around here right now. You don't need to be cool and aloof at Christmas or showing the world how damned alpha you are, you should go with the prevailing mood which is safe, warm and happy - corny even. If you're going to be part of her day, then you shouldn't jar with the theme, but let her imagine that you're there. The biggest mistake would be to be "not boring" and for the text to be seen by a relative which embar…
/r/seduction25/12/16 11:34 PM
-4

"Happy Christmas! Not on the naughty list? Need to try harder! Start with coffee on the 28th? ;-)" edit: Some seriously unhappy people here today! Any positive action being downvoted! Christmas is an opportunity. Sure, better ways about it than I've suggested above, but should have three components. Link to occasion Humour Call to action Should not be dirty as people are with families and not in the Christmas spirit.
/r/seduction25/12/16 12:52 PM
1

I'd say that it's a good parallel, although this specific technique wouldn't work too well. My most successful interviews have rapidly gone off-script and become a friendly conversation, much in the same way as on a date you don't want to play "You ask me a question and I ask you one." You will have to demonstrate some technical competence, but 95% of an unstructured interview is the employer finding out whether they can stand working with you from 9-5 every day and that's all about rapport (as …
/r/seduction29/10/16 10:11 PM
2

I have to think and type at the same time? You are of course completely correct. I lost consistency when redrafting.
/r/seduction29/10/16 09:52 PM
2

Many of these "tricks" seem manipulative when you consciously do them. However, people have natural rapport do these things unconsciously because they had a series of successful encounters when they were kids and they got built into how they interact with the world, the same way a kid lucks into catching a football a couple of times when he's 7 then starts to develop real skill as his brain works out the mechanics and becomes a "natural quarterback". What we are talking about is essentially mirr…
/r/seduction29/10/16 04:00 PM
2

Of course, you are both right. As a person, you wouldn't take quite the hard line /u/leprogrammist is suggesting. I had a play with the program you're talking about a long time ago and it was quite engaging for a short time before its rigid, formulaic conversation style became too apparent. In a narrow context, the questioning approach where you make it all about them and showing your listening skills about a topic that has some significance for them is a great way to build rapport. You are show…
/r/seduction29/10/16 03:05 PM
1

We have rather different definitions of feminism which is ok. I'd agree, she's going to be nothing but trouble if she identifies with the kind of feminism you describe. Women I've met tend to be much more restrained about their feminism. Let's call it "Boring Feminism". They generally understand they've got equal rights, now they want equal social standing and pay. You're never going to have a fun, teasing conversation with some Feminazi (let's call that "Extreme Feminism") talking-head from you…
/r/seduction08/05/16 07:09 PM
4

Can you describe what being a feminist means to you? I'm not sure we're talking about the same thing.
/r/seduction08/05/16 04:09 PM
9

I think this is the move of a real feminist, not one of the screeching psychos who get their jollies hating men and using their liberties and free speech to whine about not having liberties and free speech. A girl who is giving her number to a guy she finds interesting and attractive is breaking the norm which is a feminist act. She isn't being hypocritical. Shouldn't we be encouraging this behaviour rather than calling her lame? How great would it be if all girls felt ok to do this? How much ea…
/r/seduction08/05/16 03:57 PM
1

I like switching it around, that the dress doesn't make her look beautiful, but she makes the dress look beautiful, then you're not appreciating the dress, but you're appreciating her - probably the wisest move since you're hoping to end the evening with her, not the dress. Also, I'd wait until later to come out with the comment because to say it first thing is such a cliché and scores no points, unless you own the cliché like in your example (where she'll take it as teasing rather than a genuin…
/r/seduction21/02/15 08:39 AM
2

There is some truth to what you say, but complimenting is an art. Firstly there is the correct distinction between a appreciation and flattery. However, just because you truly believe something, it doesn't mean you should say it. If I take a girl out and the first thing I say is "You look beautiful in that dress," I have probably just given her the same bland compliment to her she has heard before at the same time she has heard before. Perhaps it isn't completely expected, but it is such a clich…
/r/seduction20/02/15 06:49 PM
1

Confessions should be done in person, if at all. With confessions you need to think, "Am I doing this for my benefit or hers?" If you're confessing something that is going to upset her, but feel great to have off your chest, you might want to reconsider. Love letters are good, but only if your handwriting doesn't look like a 3-year old trying to draw a line on their lap while in an unstable train. The girl is going to read it at least a few times, so make it look good as well as saying the right…
/r/seduction13/02/15 09:58 AM
1

Why try and turn lead into gold when there's already plenty of gold? Find girls who like you, get them to like you more and see if you can really connect. Let the ones who aren't interested find someone else or be lonely, not worth your time.
/r/seduction12/02/15 10:00 PM
10

He's talking about the Capilano Bridge Experiment if anyone is interested. I've said it before here, a friend of mine always used to watch creepy (not gory) movies in his room, on his bed with girls. This combination worked for him because girls don't tend to love horror, so they were willing to be distracted from the film, the horror made them scared and they interpreted this as attraction and his choice of location kind of stacked the cards in his favour! As for the rest of the vid, ignore it.…
/r/seduction11/02/15 10:34 PM
1

Friend of mine always put on metal as part of his ritual before going out to terrorise the town. Used to get him pumped up. I sometimes do the same and it often works if I'm in the mood.
/r/seduction11/02/15 10:17 PM
9

Cultures are different, so some will be easier some will be harder. Also, demographics are different from place to place. If the imbalance of male to females tilts women will either be much more receptive to an approach, or demand all sorts of commitments before meeting for kisses. Also remember that in Belgium, you're normal. In Canada you're a guy with a sexy European accent who can speak a language they can't understand as well as English. If they do something with you, they have a story, if …
/r/seduction11/02/15 01:05 AM
1

I thought she was going to tell him to stop hitting on her.
/r/seduction11/02/15 01:01 AM
2

Don't play her game. Spend time reminding her how much fun you had together over summer, bring in all the different senses as you evoke memories of fun, then fooling around and joke about something intimate that she did that you've never known a girl do before. If it's going to be around valentines you might work into things that you feel a little bad that you can take advantage of her not being in a relationship at this most romantic of times - you can sleep at her place because she's single at…
/r/seduction10/02/15 11:11 PM
2

Trust me, you're doing all the right things. It is excellent that you are admitting that you are scared. That's totally different from "not ready." No one jumps out of a plane for the first time without being scared. Emotionally, this is the same. It's ok, own it. Be brave and jump. That you have looked at yourself, said "Not good enough," and gone out to start fixing it, rather than reaching for the icecream says a lot about you. That you come here and ask for advice when there are some trolls …
/r/seduction10/02/15 05:12 PM
8

Some fun you could have is to "out-romantic" the other couples at any bar. She's got to be down with it, but you could both play at being the most nauseatingly in-love couple in the world. Is there a flower on the table? Give it to her while telling her how it's not nearly as beautiful as she is. Put it in her hair. Declare your undying love for her. Ask if the restaurant has any balloons (or take some with you and ask them to bring them out with dessert. It's all fun role-playing, but at the sa…
/r/seduction10/02/15 05:04 PM
4

Depending on the party and your preparation "Let's go make some punch" can work really well. You get them in the kitchen which is much quieter and the activity works to keep the ice melted, covering up any awkwardness. Then you get to make the concoction together which is good ground work, not to mention the fact that you both have to try it a lot to make sure it is nice. All the prep you need for this is to ensure that you've got plenty of fruit juice handy (not hard and inexpensive), a large b…
/r/seduction10/02/15 04:53 PM
2

If we waited until we were ready for things, we'd still be considering exactly how we wanted to draw the first stroke of a bison on a cave wall. You need some experiences which invalidate your scumbag subconscious which is telling you that you're not good enough. Keep up transforming yourself into a slightly better you each day, but also get closer to some people. You don't have to throw yourself into a full romance, but find some guys you like, go out with them and let them romance you a bit.
/r/seduction10/02/15 08:32 AM
2

At New Years a girl tapped me on the shoulder. I thought it must have been the crowded dance floor and turned away so I wouldn't knock her again. She thought I was being a dick and blanking her. You're not alone :-)
/r/seduction09/02/15 09:08 AM
3

misogynistic I don't think you're likely to find too many here who dislike women. "Male chauvinism" perhaps was what you were reaching for? In that case, yes, be a male chauvinist, but in a nice, old-fashioned way in some areas. Despite womens lib and stuff girls still like to be dominated in small ways. Telling her that you're both going to do something she almost certainly wants to do gives her the thrill of being subordinate with the security of the action being in her comfort zone.
/r/seduction08/02/15 11:33 PM
1

"Why so serious?"
/r/seduction08/02/15 11:26 PM
6

Sounds like you might have a self-esteem issue. Something at the back of your mind is saying, "No he can't really be having these feelings towards me, I'm ugly and boring, it's a trick or he'll realise what I am really like and I'm going to get hurt! Best I play it safe, hide out at home and fire up Sleepless In Seattle again."
/r/seduction08/02/15 11:24 PM
2

I'm not afraid of women, I am afraid of the pain and humiliation of getting my heart publicly ripped from my chest and trodden on in stilettos in return for putting myself in a vulnerable situation. Not giving a shit is a bit of a work in progress for me. I care too much.
/r/seduction08/02/15 11:17 PM
1

If she thinks you're a player, anything is going to seem like a line. Best I can think of is "I'm flattered that you think I'm great at attracting women, but you're the only one in my life right now. You know it's the right time to take the next step <pause> or for us to move on. It's your choice <girl's name>." Apparently saying "it's your choice" increases the probability of a "yes" by something like 20%. I don't see that fessing up is going to help. Either she believes you and wonders what is…
/r/seduction08/02/15 11:11 PM
4

I hate it when people use Twitter like this. "Look at me!" "Look at me now!" "Look at me happy!" "Look at me a bit drunk!" "Look at me very drunk!" "Look at me saaadface." Perhaps his motivation is prostituting his life out which in some way will help his Chicken Dentures enterprise, understandable, but not exactly laudable. His attitude is just about right though. No need to get hung up on being stood up, the night is yet young.
/r/seduction08/02/15 11:04 PM
1

It would be hard to distinguish between attraction and nerves here. The whole Japanese culture about how women should act around men means they are shy and nervous, especially 1-1. Add making language mistakes where mistakes are seen as embarrassing to the point of being shameful and you have super-nervous. It depends on the girl and her upbringing. Either way, go for it. Japanese culture is all about seeing the man hero. Today the hero is the businessman rather than the warrior, but the women s…
/r/seduction04/02/15 12:39 PM
1

Some signs of attraction are driven by biology and are universal. So eye dilation and face becoming flushed is universal. I'd also say that playing with hair and moving about would be universal too since both arise from nervousness which triggers adrenaline which in turn expresses itself as fidgetiness.
/r/seduction04/02/15 10:32 AM
1

Gentle negging is useful and is subtly different from teasing. Teasing is more affectionate and playful. Negging is slightly more barbed to unbalance and push someone away. Why? The idea is that you've already demonstrated value, so something in the girl is saying "this is someone you want to investigate further" or "I want to be in this group." Negging is giving her signals that you've not accepted her into your social circle yet, she's got to do some work to get her VIP ticket. This is unsettl…
/r/seduction04/02/15 10:25 AM
2

Firstly and most importantly, breath. Relationships with girls who are not breathing are pretty unhealthy - especially if lasting more than a day or two. Most of everything else comes down to personal preference. I like funny, intelligent girls who exude positive energy and happiness. Many guys don't like to be challenged by girls due to holding onto outdated notions of superiority. I like a girl who can tease me and show me up when I'm being a fool. Long hair is lovely, blond and brunette are d…
/r/seduction01/02/15 12:40 PM
2

As should any Die Hard (2) fans.
/r/seduction27/01/15 02:08 AM
1

I don't know if he mentions it in a later episode, but Iceland is also REALLY interbred. They literally have an app so when they go out they can check that they're not like second-cousins. They could do with some more genes! Check out the film Jar City, it's a bit weird, but a good murder mystery which tells you a lot about Iceland.
/r/seduction27/01/15 02:04 AM
0

True. You'll never hit Mornington Crescent if you're not clear on the 3rd RR. Also, you need to check whether diagonals are in play and if traversing carries a multiplier; otherwise your scorecard will be severely messed up. Can you remind me, since they tightened up in the 3rd RR, when converting your score from the 2nd RR, do you multiply your approach count by 0.96 or 0.94 to control for clerk approaches? I missed the end of the video cast by PUA High Council. Cheers.
/r/seduction27/01/15 01:51 AM
1

Sounds like they were both into you and were blocking one another. Twins are often really close, but really competitive. No one wants to be alone while they know their two friends are getting it on and that is much, much worse for a twin who knows it could easily be her getting the attention. To be honest there is likely no way that you could have played this and come out with a result - they were both sabotaging one another and well-adjusted twins rarely do threesomes. Options you might have ta…
/r/seduction27/01/15 01:35 AM
1

In that case, I'd do what you've always done. Hit on her a little and take things a little further and a little further. Implicitly dare and tease her.
/r/seduction26/01/15 02:24 AM
1

Do you like her? If not, then move on. It's easy to feel reflected attraction - you liking her just because she is showing an interest in you (especially if she was previously hostile). I have to say, I'd be a little suspicious that she wasn't just being a bitch. Could be she "hated" you because she liked you and couldn't express those kind of feelings, or she might have not liked you and still not like you and have something harsh planned. Depends on how mature she is.
/r/seduction26/01/15 01:49 AM
0

Well done on making the approach. That's 90% of the work there. I wouldn't lead with a generic compliment because it often does lead to the walls going up. What you might have done is try again before retreating - in for a penny, in for a pound! "Thank you, it is nice to be appreciated. If you've got time for a coffee, I've got time to be shamelessly flattering about your eyes."
/r/seduction25/01/15 02:40 PM
0

The most personally attractive girl I ever met was bi. She had a magical sexual charisma that made everyone love being near her while being only a 7. I'd have given a kidney to be with her - probably a reason why I never had a chance. Chances are you won't get more than fling or short relationship, bi girls by their nature are sensation-seeking which makes going steady problematic for them. Due to the conversation about twins, some threesome discussion has been coming up. With twins, it's vanish…
/r/seduction25/01/15 02:24 PM
2

NP. Trick is to have a strategy, not a plan. A plan is: I'll say this and she'll say this and then I'll say this... This is comforting, but gives you a false sense of security because you feel you know how it is going to play out. However, life and especially girls irritatingly don't work like that and when she goes off script, you're going to be left doing a goldfish impression because your head is full of what you are going to say next and next and next and you have no mental capacity left to …
/r/seduction25/01/15 02:12 PM
3

There used to be very rigid paths to relationships and marriage and women tended not to have much say in the matter. Changes in society, feminism, equal rights have destroyed all that. This has freed up society and made women's lives better, but made the dating process more difficult. Some guys get lucky. They have the right mix of genes and early experience and without effort make women attracted to them. They have been taught by life how to tease, escalate, touch and charm. Others have not had…
/r/seduction25/01/15 01:54 PM
3

NEVER say something like "This might come across as weird." You have just set her expectations that she's about to hear something weird. You've positioned yourself as a weirdo so to make progress you've got to beat this preconception you've just implanted and then make a positive impression. To take a stronger example, you wouldn't go up to her and say "This may sound really creepy and disturbing, but I just had to come over..." No, no, no! Coming over and saying she's cute...miiight work. Depen…
/r/seduction25/01/15 01:42 PM
1

Some girls won't reply until they have analysed what you've said with their friends and drafted six replies with them. If she's replying, she's interested. Chill out and don't feel that you have to reply as soon as you get a text from her.
/r/seduction23/01/15 10:52 PM
3

I think for outsiders and new joiners they think it's just tricks to add notches to a bed post as you crush beautiful women's hearts as you move from one to the next. There are bound to be a few psychopaths who do something like this, but very few. Personally I've found it's about finding something about a girl which makes me fall in love with them just a little. I try and find this in all of the women I meet no matter their attractiveness or availability. I think them seeing that spark reflecte…
/r/seduction21/01/15 10:03 PM
5

Guy I lived with always went for creepy, not gory, horror so they would grab him and he could comfort them. Basically anything that was originally Japanese, The Ring, The Grudge or Gothica. He had things set up so the only place to watch it was his bed, half the battle won right there. Personally, I'd go for the slushy options others have highlighted, but I thought it might help to know other routes to success.
/r/seduction21/01/15 06:23 PM
1

Yeah, they'll go with the first thing that comes into their heads that will get them out of the situation ASAP. Anything they say is totally unreliable, so best act a slightly disappointed, but you're already moving on, take it like a man and mozy off into the sunset. Or better yet, get together with her best friend.
/r/seduction20/01/15 10:48 PM
1

There could be many reasons, many of which have nothing to do with you. It is evidence, but you can't be sure of what it is evidence of. The more it happens, the more chance it is you and her which is why many guys operate a three strikes rule. Giving up right away is foolish. Chasing a bit is ok. Harassing / being led on is not.
/r/seduction20/01/15 06:34 PM
1

Remember that you are baiting a hook. You're not just relying on her memory of your hansom visage and sparkling conversation to get her to agree. Tease her with a bit of information with the implicit promise that you've got a story to tell (make sure you have a story to tell!) You've not just come back from your trip, you've come back from hitting the casinos like Ocean's 11 or a wild weekend - don't worry it was me who ended up in the ER!
/r/seduction20/01/15 05:55 PM
2

"Hi Jenny, I'm back from bare-knuckle fighting sharks. Want to meet for kisses tomorrow?" Notice, no apology. edit: increased topicality
/r/seduction20/01/15 05:24 PM
7

Don't start with the back. Start with her hands. There are some great youtube vids on hand and arm massage. Back massages and rubs are kind of sexual, but hands will easily get your foot in the door and you can find all sorts of excuses for - she's carrying something heavy, she passes you something and you "feel tension" in her hand. Bonus is here you start off face to face and can get great eye contact and conversation until she starts to relax. Once you've done her hands you can tell her to tu…
/r/seduction20/01/15 05:18 PM
1

Go out, have fun, meet some new people, have some experiences. Get back to her in a few days with stories of great deeds. Don't shrug your shoulders and wave the white flag at the first sign of indifference from a girl you like.
/r/seduction20/01/15 11:31 AM
3

Any failures would leave you needing somewhere else to live. Until having a roof over your head is not an issue, leave her alone. That's not to say that you can't put in some groundwork to indirectly build attraction, but anything that is showing more interest than demonstrating that you're a healthy well-adjusted guy in the presence of an attractive girl is risking too much. Haha, just thought. You could watch The Flash together. Your situation is the secondary plot of the first series!
/r/seduction20/01/15 11:02 AM
4

Don't sweat the whole alpha/beta thing. It is true to an extent, but only an extent. Of course you should be his friend, but on your terms. Don't go up against someone if you don't have to and certainly don't challenge them on their home ground. Work out what girls like about him and learn from it without trying to be him. Girls will like something different about you, find out what that is and offer them that. Girls like different things, it isn't a case of having to fight him for control of th…
/r/seduction20/01/15 12:25 AM
3

I see it as skills to improve my relationships in general and women in particular. For me it isn't about notches on the bedpost, but smiles, flirting, sassy conversations and fun that make an otherwise boring day into something worth experiencing. Also, if I can make a 53 year old mother of three who has been married for the past 30 years feel funny, attractive, intelligent and the focus of my attention for 10 minutes, that is a gift I can give her which costs me nothing. Knowing that you've lif…
/r/seduction20/01/15 12:17 AM
2

Seriously, take dance classes. It is ALL win. Firstly, you get to improve your dancing. You'll move from being like everyone else just more of less convulsing in rhythm to being able to do some steps and it will make you move better. Most importantly it is a GREAT way to meet girls and practice charming them. They are all yours for 5 minutes and you have a subject to talk about, enforced kino, all barriers down and...well it's just perfect. Well, almost perfect. You don't always get the perfect …
/r/seduction19/01/15 06:32 PM
1

Reading your comment made me consider whether I was being a bit harsh...but then I thought naaah! If someone asks "Would it hurt if I turned on a blender and stuck my hand in?" I think they have a really poor understanding of their hand, the blender and the likely interaction between the two. Any degree of thought or understanding is going to provide the answer, so a blunt response is appropriate. The idea of a girl you might want to have set with replying positively to a cold, direct approach i…
/r/seduction19/01/15 06:25 PM
2

Imagine you are in a swimming pool. All of your movements are being slowed as you push through the water. The difference between desperate and going after is what you want is how rushed you are. Physically moving slightly slowly will give you a predatory grace.
/r/seduction16/01/15 05:41 PM
0

Realistically only in situations where you're going to be paying her. All a girl would have to go on is how you delivered the line and how you look. She has to consider whether you are safe, whether you are hygienic, whether she is attracted to you, whether it is morally compatible with her self-image etc etc etc. The odds are massively stacked against you. Either you'd have to be famous, rich and in the right place, incredibly attractive or talking to a prostitute for any likelihood for success…
/r/seduction16/01/15 05:31 PM
1

I think you're ok. If she was being cold she wouldn't have replied to your last text, instead she tried to salvage the (mis)communication. Invite her out somewhere and make a joke of it when you meet her, something like how you were seconds away from deleting her from your phone or crossing her off your Christmas card list when her message came in.
/r/seduction16/01/15 05:21 PM
2

It is a spectrum, but I think introverts have different brain wiring to extroverts. It isn't just that an introvert is a socially crippled wannabe extrovert. That's like saying that someone who is left-handed is just a poorly coordinated right-handed wannabe. Introverts can put on an extroverted disguise and play the part for a while, but it is really exhausting. Sometimes it needs to be done. Other times, it pays to be an introvert. Eliciting values and forming deep connections can be easier be…
/r/seduction16/01/15 03:52 PM
1

Some people are introverts and it is really tough to come across as a high-energy, exciting kinda guy. Lucky thing is, you don't have to be. Ok, you may never be Mr Charisma who walks into a club and is instantly surrounded by girls, but there is no reason why you can't make a strong connection with the girl in front of you. I bet you can think of times in the past when you've been on form and had people laughing and you've been in control of the stage. There's no reason you can't learn the skil…
/r/seduction16/01/15 02:29 PM
1

I struggle in London, but then I am positively arid ;)
/r/seduction16/01/15 02:20 PM
1

I used to share a house with a guy who would watch films with the new girl in his room. He didn't have any chairs, so they would be on his bed and he'd put on creepy horror like The Ring. I don't know any more details, but he said that most of the time they'd miss the end of the movie. I hate horror, so I wasn't too interested in his trick, but the general idea makes sense. People don't know it, but they choose how to interpret their reactions and do so in the way that is most flattering to them…
/r/seduction15/01/15 03:54 PM
3

Say everything with a slight smile and a warmth to your voice. Be positive and be specific. It is a habit you need to get into, rather than vetting everything you say before you say it. Basically if you could say the compliment about any girl, you've missed the mark. So no "your hair looks nice," rather, "I love how those curls frame your face," not "I like your dress" but, "That blue is a great colour for you, you make that dress look beautiful." See in the second case we compliment first her t…
/r/seduction15/01/15 11:48 AM
5

Watch some chick flicks, you can bet that she has. There is a formula for a kiss that she will know. Get close. Lock eyes. Talk with...ever...more...pauses. This creates anticipation and tension. Stop talking. Look at her lips. If you want to give her a chance to bail, bring your hand up to her cheek and brush her cheek bone with your thumb. This is a classic "I'm about to kiss you" pose and caress. She will withdraw if she isn't up for it. Don't wait around at this point, you only want to allow…
/r/seduction15/01/15 11:40 AM
2

"Imagine a vibrator that could learn exactly what you like and only get better over time. That day is coming. I have been sent from the future to prevent it and save mankind." Can't fail. ;)
/r/seduction14/01/15 11:30 PM
1

Dancing has always been a way to get up close and personal with the opposite sex. Even in rigid societies people danced with multiple partners, even if there was always "room for God" between partners. Take it from me, get out and join a dance class. You will meet some HOT girls and you will be tripping over one another and laughing as you learn. Right now I go to a salsa class, it is such a case of levelling up. Depending on the week it can be feast of famine women-wise. Dancing with an imagina…
/r/seduction14/01/15 07:50 PM
147

If you made her day then you've already won. You've made the world a better place than it was before you opened your mouth. Well done. If you've laid some groundwork for the future, either with her or just by showing yourself that girls won't be harsh when you approach and say something nice to them, that's even better, but you've already won in my book.
/r/seduction12/01/15 08:45 PM
5

Don't beat yourself up about it. I've read some comments here and it's so easy to play it cool in your head. You were clearly blind-sided, double-teamed and kept off balance. My advice would be to let yourself go. The relationship was the girl and her friend and you. You needed to break down that barrier so it was the three of you. One way would have been to take the News Anchor challenge and use the girl who you were less in to as a co-host or interviewee so you were not performing to them both…
/r/seduction08/05/14 04:28 PM
27

That's what I'd do. "Hey, nice jacket where'd you get it? Really? They do have some good stuff in from time to time. I'm Jason by the way, here with Katie, and you're...? Paul. Good to meet you Paul. Who are you here with?" Then either: "That lot? Looks like a rough crowd, I can see why you came over to talk with us! Just kidding, they look ok. Maybe we'll come over and get a drink with you guys later." or "Ah came solo. The lone wolf. I can respect that, sometimes you can only really enjoy the …
/r/seduction28/03/14 05:38 PM
18

Shows excellent taste.
/r/seduction09/02/14 08:47 PM
126

Assume attraction. If she is giving you the eye, you win. If she wasn't giving you the eye and gets interested, you win. If she wasn't giving you the eye and isn't interested, you lose nothing.
/r/seduction09/02/14 06:05 PM
1

Haha, you're so right. I should have put a disclaimer that I was speaking figuratively. To actually attempt to take ice-cream away from a woman is likely to leave you useless to any woman, if you survive at all!
/r/seduction24/01/14 10:01 AM
28

Ever heard of diminishing marginal returns? A common analogy is an ice-cream (an analogy I shall now torture without mercy). On a hot day, you've just got your ice-cream from the vendor and it looks amazing. You give it a lick. It's perfect, just what you needed, cool, sweet, refreshing, amazing. You lick again, almost as good, your mouth is starting to cool slightly and it's great. Each lick is not quite as good as the previous one, it makes you happier, but not by as much. Eventually it won't …
/r/seduction24/01/14 02:50 AM
16

I took her to a supermarket, I don't know why but I had to start it somewhere, so it started there.
/r/seduction13/01/14 05:36 PM
2

You're simplifying neuroscience to such an extent you're not left with anything useful. Best to just set it aside. All you really need to know is that everyone gets anxious and what matters is how you deal with it. You shouldn't try to fight it chemically or mentally, but re-frame your response to it: I am anxious about talking to this girl >> I am excited about talking to this girl It's the same feeling, the same emotions (and, if you must, the same neuro-chemistry), but you're using that buzz …
/r/seduction13/01/14 05:31 PM
2

Circumstances matter a great deal. If you're working for a big corporate and date someone who is in an unrelated department who is more or less your level and you're not looking to screw and move on, it's ok. Those are a lot of caveats! However, we spend most of our time at work, so to totally rule it out is short-sighted. Think of worst case scenario. Things don't work out and the girl turns into a vindictive bunny-boiler, can she hurt you job-wise? Since you're worried about gossip just from a…
/r/seduction13/01/14 05:02 PM
1

Yeah, we can write off the abuse cases. They are special, tragic cases and you probably wouldn't want the girl. I've not known any girls who have been seriously abused, but studied the psychology. The girls I've known who have been in dysfunctional, but not abusive relationships have been mad as a box of frogs. Very welcome to go back an ex! It's probably just a matter of perspective, but I don't think you are giving inertia enough credit. Relationship baggage can really slow a girl from moving …
/r/seduction03/01/14 06:03 PM
1

Ultimately, yes, she does find him less attractive, but it's not necessarily his fault. Women are just as, if not more prone to oneitis as guys; they're biologically programmed to form strong single attachments to secure resources and while they may bang an attractive guy, it can take much more to shift her from seeing her ex as her provider - especially if she's created some epic romance story BS for herself and / or invested a lot of time and emotion into that relationship. That's why a shocki…
/r/seduction03/01/14 12:50 PM
2

As a one-off, I'd say your "Watching this without you" move is good, but it isn't a pattern I'd get into. You're basically saying "I'm going to be a dick, haha no I'm not, only joking!" If you tell someone something enough, they'll believe you. Being dominant doesn't mean establishing you have thought about being a jerk and making her unhappy, could do it, but backtrack with humour which is often the way it gets painted here. What's she really after here? Affirmation. This is an activity you're …
/r/seduction03/01/14 03:40 AM
1

Not quite end of story. Sometimes dating outside the relationship or cheating is part of the dynamic of their relationship. In that case the poor/lucky guy caught in the middle is just a place-holder to see and screw a bit before the main male lead in her little drama returns to centre stage. In that case it hardly matters how awesome cardboard cut-out guy-in-the-middle is, he is never given serious consideration. He will get some dates and sex, so it isn't all bad, just best not to invest anyth…
/r/seduction03/01/14 02:47 AM
3

You're right and you're wrong here. There is some REALLY messed up thinking going on. Very few people actually enjoy being mistreated and it isn't that which brings people back time and again to awful relationships. People allow themselves to be mistreated because it is necessary to achieve other goals. One reason can be if someone expresses their love in the act of forgiveness. If you treat them like gold, give them nothing to forgive, they get frustrated because they are unable to make the kin…
/r/seduction03/01/14 02:39 AM
1

I love sassy girls. If I can't verbally fence with a girl I'm just not interested, so I'm willing to take some deeper cuts which are inexpertly delivered once we've settled into a rapport. I would draw a line if she smacked me with a crowbar for no apparent reason, I'm not a masochist! I remember being slapped by a girl hard enough for it to cause an echo and everyone to look at us. This was during banter. She was grinning at me like she'd just made the most witty retort possible. I told her ver…
/r/seduction23/12/13 08:51 PM
1

I think you're talking about the equivalent of a friendly punch on the shoulder and I'm talking about a right hook to the jaw. Smiling nicely as someone sticks knives in you isn't the way to go. If it comes from her friend then I'd go for some catty banter, defending yourself will not lose you any ground with your interest, quite the reverse if you're not to harsh and are funny. If it comes from your interest, I don't think there is much to be gained by hanging around. Like I said in a comment f…
/r/seduction23/12/13 08:19 PM
5

I won't validate someone's abusive behaviour accepting it with a laugh. Girls don't go for guys they don't respect and you've accepted an inferior position by taking the hit. I'm not saying you can't regain ground elsewhere, but it is a big setback allowing her to be abusive to you. I wouldn't go as far as demanding an explicit apology, but I would want it expressed through her actions - like approaching me later on. What is the best use of your time? Keeping talking to her and trying to regain …
/r/seduction23/12/13 07:33 PM
2

I'm with you on this. If she's serious then showing that you're prepared to take the hit lying down is exactly the wrong thing to do. As is retaliation, both make you look weak. The right target is her shame. Looking her straight in the eyes "I never expected you to say something that hurtful. You can talk to me later if that wasn't the real you talking. Have a good night." You've told her you won't accept abuse, shown her you won't accept abuse, made her feel like a bad person and given her a w…
/r/seduction23/12/13 05:01 PM
5

You're in an amazing position here. You're a constant in the lives of these girls when most of the other guys are there for one night and probably don't treat them with much respect. I'd go for being a contrast to that. Treat them as people with interests, like you said look them in the eye, especially when topless, throw in some manners and you'll be seen as a desirable gent, compared to the customers. People take pride in their work. Use that. Is one particularly good on the pole? "How the hel…
/r/seduction22/12/13 06:11 PM
30

It's easier to improve than create ;) Good post.
/r/seduction22/11/13 06:01 PM
81

Addition to being "psychic". Take her hand for god's sake! Once she's agreed to play tell her to give you her hand, because you need "the physical as well as spiritual connection" or for scientists you are going to "read her involuntary physical responses, like pulse and muscle contractions" because you're a human lie detector. With the latter you can take her hand in both of yours, your hand under touching her pulse point and hers resting on top with you cradling the tips of her fingers above y…
/r/seduction22/11/13 04:57 PM
2

Also like a muscle, if continually tested it will weaken with fatigue and give. This is why telesales don't quit until at least eight "no" responses and why persistence after a knockback can get you the answer you're looking for.
/r/seduction12/11/13 06:12 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter