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PoppinPMAGs Archive

View 29 posts and 99 comments by PoppinPMAGs on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
82

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men13/03/23 04:01 PM
37

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men09/03/23 07:21 PM
36

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men23/12/22 01:18 PM
33

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 07:38 PM
33

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men07/04/23 01:01 AM
28

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men19/01/23 12:29 PM
25

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men04/01/23 08:08 PM
24

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men02/12/22 07:11 PM
21

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men02/12/22 01:21 PM
19

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men07/12/22 08:52 PM
19

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men29/11/22 01:21 AM
13

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men27/02/23 08:23 PM
12

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 11:25 AM
11

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men19/02/23 11:57 PM
9

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men13/06/23 12:26 PM
9

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men09/03/23 12:30 AM
9

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men28/01/23 03:33 PM
8

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men03/03/23 07:09 PM
5

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men16/04/23 10:48 AM
5

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men30/11/22 02:53 AM
5

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men16/03/23 05:34 PM
4

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men15/03/23 04:26 PM
4

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men15/01/23 12:59 PM
4

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men20/02/23 08:32 PM
3

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men28/01/23 09:25 PM
2

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men05/12/22 05:41 PM
2

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men19/12/22 07:29 PM
2

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 03:45 PM
2

PoppinPMAGs/r/Divorce_Men06/02/23 06:21 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
5

That may be a good option, sounds exactly like our situation. We seperated in August, so the majority of the year our finances were jointly paying childcare, mortg.,taxes etc.
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/23 03:34 PM
1

It's approximately 40k, there was about 80k she didn't properly disclose
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/23 11:12 PM
1

Considering it, having second thoughts as I signed off on no support for the sake of my kids, then this.
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/23 11:06 AM
5

That's what I meant, I'm an idiot
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/23 11:38 PM
20

Also, when his mom passes, it's his inheritance and not touchable (hopefully)
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/23 09:13 PM
2

I have the 40% of the time
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/23 12:15 PM
1

So will the bank have me sign something to remove my name from the existing mortgage when she refinances? Not quote sure on the exact process, but I assume I don't want to sign anything until the promised funds are in my account.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 04:56 PM
1

It's a part of the refinancing process I believe.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 03:35 PM
1

The decree states she has to refinance the home, so as part of the new mortgage I'd have to sign the quit claim (I assume)? I just don't want her to finalize it until I'm paid for it.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 03:17 PM
2

Please explain, once the funds hit my 401k, it can't be touched by anyone else right? I was intending to take a loan from my 401k once the funds are there for a downpayment on a new house
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 02:19 PM
1

But the decree states she only has 90 days to refi and get my name off mortgage. It also says I have to sign any documents for that to happen (quit claim deed). It also says my settlement is to be paid out of her 401k via qdro. It's almost a catch 22, what if the qdro isn't done within 90 days, can she be found in contempt?
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 02:18 PM
2

We had it good - Chase Mathew
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/23 12:45 AM
2

I'll eat a nice meal and never think of it again.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/23 08:32 PM
3

a 4k dog
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/23 08:31 PM
2

Having been on the receiving end of a TRO for absolutely no reason other than a legal tactic, I'd advise against it. There's absolutely no history of violence in my household, and the TRO was denied, but it was just deeply disheartening she would stoop so low.
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/23 11:24 AM
20

It hit so close to home when he mentioned his ex wife stole his house. At that moment I realized, if a multi millionaire couldn't save his house from a vindictive ex wife, what hope did I have.
/r/Divorce_Men17/03/23 03:50 PM
3

I'm going to substitute joining a rural country club ($600 a year for unlimited golf), and for added business connection benefits.
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/23 05:30 PM
1

3 children, she makes approximately 3 times as much as I do. GAL kept the agreed temp plan in place, she works weekends. Currently I have children Friday morning through Sunday Night.
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/23 02:32 PM
1

The GAL report recommends the current temporary arrangement, which is 70/30. I wanted 50/50, but typically the judge goes off the GAL report. It's likely another 10-15k to get to trial, and then nothing is guaranteed.
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/23 06:51 PM
1

Really as it stands w/ me agreeing to the worst-case scenario of custody 70/30, she would essentially owe me in maintenance what I owe in child support. However, if the judge would grant 50/50, the tables are turned a bit, but obviously, that's taking a chance at trial. Essentially if I agree now it equals out, but in the future, I thought I could try and modify it and the worst would be it gets shut down and Id be out some attorney fees.
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/23 06:45 PM
1

Im having second thoughts (hence this post), its agreed, but not signed yet.
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/23 06:30 PM
5

Well, we had a nice living room setup it just didn't include a recliner, I asked a few times over the years but had the idea shot down, it wasn't that big of a deal, but now I don't have to ask :)
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/23 05:13 PM
6

All of them
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/23 05:12 PM
6

Mine keeps mentioning some guy from her high school in passing, I'm sure she's fucking him but won't come out and say it. Oh well. Just time for us to have our own fun!
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/23 08:04 PM
1

If you would feel comfortable sharing id love an example of what may need to be included. It's hard to plan for long term as the children's needs change and adapt language to that effect
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/23 06:10 PM
1

Can I add on this question a bit as Im in the same situation. We settled the main things, but my lawyer said ex's (petitioner) attorney had to draft the parenting plan and that his plans are notoriously vague (exact opposite of what I want). Is that correct, or can we draft our own (I already have quite a bit) obviously at my expense.
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/23 01:31 PM
2

Had the same experience happen a few weeks back. She's even going by a different first name. Odd, but easy to swipe left knowing who she is now.
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/23 01:29 AM
2

Your attorney didn't put a deadline for refi in there? I made sure my ex knew what contempt was and she agreed to 60 days
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/23 12:40 PM
1

That's the only bad part, but hoping to revisit that when I have a house closer to the children's school
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/23 12:10 PM
2

No need, it's up to her to prove the premarital contributions which seems like it will be a chore. Thanks though
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/23 03:01 AM
2

I like you
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/23 02:18 AM
1

Interesting. So the hardest part would be obtaining 20 year old statements then. Wonder how far back they keep contribution records?
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/23 02:18 AM
1

Not in my state, even so we were married almost 15 years
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/23 01:28 AM
2

It surely is. My only hope is somehow we can persuade the judge in our favor, I'll fight until the end but resolved if he follows the GAL too, can always appeal.
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/23 12:22 PM
2

Didn't cite anything subpar, it's a small one bedroom apartment so obviously not ideal, but it is what it is until this is final and I can buy a home. It's certainly clean and safe and I take wonderful care of my children, as noted in the report. I was asking for an additional night, I don't mind the schedule as the other parent works weekends, so while not ideal it works for the time being.
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/23 09:32 PM
3

Wouldn't surprise me
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/23 10:10 PM
1

I'm really thinking that while not advisable, and no court order barring exclusive residence, I still have legal access. I doubt sheriff would do much to intervene.
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/23 09:03 PM
6

I always ask reddit first before adding to billable hours 😂. Nothing at all prohibiting me other than her objections, and she has changed door codes to the garage, I dont have keys either.
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/23 08:52 PM
2

Kind of like a whipper snapper, but older.
/r/Divorce_Men27/02/23 02:50 AM
1

She tried the Restraining order route, but it got denied as there was no evidence whatsoever. Our state doesn't require that. The only barrier would be her
/r/Divorce_Men21/02/23 12:19 PM
5

Yes, most likely. It's tough man, I've been at it almost a year, it's tough as she'll eventually owe me support, and I'm having a tough time hanging in there financially
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/23 06:28 PM
5

I'm in the same boat, she's a higher earner, but yes her retirement is half yours and vice versa, I'm just saying that if you cash out yours now it's still technically half hers, which may come out of her part of the settlement
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/23 06:17 PM
3

She's likely entitled to half of your retirement, may be something to consider
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/23 06:12 PM
1

IANAL, but with it being essentially a gift, and receiving it after you were married, I'd consider it marital assets.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/23 12:25 AM
3

Going to bet they don't love anymore
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/23 09:25 PM
1

She's paying the. mortgage currently as she lives there, and intends to keep the house (and buy out my equity)
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/23 07:35 PM
1

Which would make sense on her account. Alternatively, how does it work at trial when she's proposing a buyout of my equity, but is also more than likely going to owe me Child/Spousal support, and unable to refi w/ the amount she owes me monthly? Seems like we could avoid a lot of wasted time by selling now, or refi'ing now.
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/23 07:32 PM
2

Indeed, not even the fact she makes considerably more than I do, and the mortg is less than my current rent. Also, fair rent on a property like we own would be ~2k/ month and our mortg is much less than that, seems like she should be paying my rent
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/23 07:07 PM
2

Which I fear we'll never agree on that. I guess my only option is to wait until trial and a final decree?
/r/Divorce_Men06/02/23 06:55 PM
1

Yes
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/23 01:05 PM
3

In the same boat. I have no idea who this person I'm fighting with is.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/23 12:31 AM
1

Been together 20 years, married 14, 3 kids
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/23 11:22 PM
1

LOL, yeah that's not how it works, I actually think that may be why mine at first offered to do an entire settlement from QDRO, so I'd have less after taxes as a lump sum to use for a downpayment.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/23 11:22 PM
2

Looking back, I have no idea how man. I've been through 100x the drama in the past 6 months than I've experienced in the 40 years previous.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/23 11:13 PM
1

What was the process after that, you have the qdro form to your 401k administrator or company and they just sent her a check for the half? I'm just going to look at it as the retirement I wasn't able to build as I had a more flexible job to stay home while we focused on her career.
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/23 11:12 PM
1

I already could've bought a car or had a sizable amount towards the down-payment on a new house for what I've already wasted on attorney fees. We don't even have that much to fight over, she just thinks it's all hers because se she was the higher earner
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/23 09:55 PM
2

Probably that too... I reached out to the cpa we've used forever and she said she'd figure it both ways (married joint/seperate) and whatever was most advantageous she would do, then split the refund into our respective accounts
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/23 09:47 PM
1

Spot on, her way is the only way
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/23 09:20 PM
1

Can't blame her, once I have the money I plan and doing the same. New family photos with just the kids and myself. Others of just myself doing some sort of activity, possibly even one of the royalty oil paintings from the terrible Facebook ads
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/23 01:48 PM
3

Thanks, I was naive and didn't think to include that in our agreement, now kicking myself
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/23 02:32 PM
2

Thanks, I'll get with my attorney and explain the details and have him file an amended affidavit
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/23 01:51 PM
1

I've already filed mine before I knew who she would call as a potential witness
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/23 01:44 PM
3

I can't imagine, but somewhat similar man save I have 3 kids, married 14 years. It's been nearly a year and she still hasn't disclosed statements for nearly 150k in assets I know she has. All I want to do is settle equitably, be able to buy a small house for my kids and get out of an apt. What should've been an easy split is anything but. At this rate, I'll be thousands in debt and barely able to afford a small apt for the foreseeable future.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 12:33 AM
3

Apparently, there is absolutely no recourse for redacting, or just entirely not sending statements for accounts. I've yet to see any statement from 3 accounts of hers that total over 150k. We've had to request them at least 4x, and have subpoenas into the bank as well. It just seems like there is no recourse whatsoever. That on top of this spending with a financial TRO in place, she should be being held for contempt of court.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 12:31 AM
1

We have, they haven't responded
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/23 11:01 PM
4

Yep... No kidding. When I asked my attorney he just kind of shrugged it off, it's blatantly in violation of the financial TRO
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/23 09:53 PM
2

I think I'll just instruct to just prepare for trial, disregard any of thier bs. I can't afford this as is, we're requesting she pay attorney fees, which will likely come out of the settlement, but this is just exorbitant.
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/23 08:47 PM
15

Yes, yes I am. I have no clue, I truly don't. The kids have said she's bought a lot of new furniture, but I can't even fathom spending that much. I think she feels like if she spends it all, it won't be possible to split. Obviously the statements will show everything. Kicker was.... I put down a 3k retainer, attorney said initially that'd probably cover most everything. He said with her constant bs, his fees are at nearly 8k. I nearly fainted
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/23 08:34 PM
1

Get your own appraisal, my ex submitted one from years ago in a totally different housing market than we are seeing now. I paid to have a new one done, and shockingly, it was 50k+ higher than hers.
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/22 01:24 PM
8

In the works
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/22 02:03 PM
5

That has crossed my mind. However, if I do that, I feel like it escalates everything 1000x over, every possible "exchange" could necessitate that.
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/22 01:26 PM
2

If you want to keep it, just reverse the scenario and give her half. It sounds like she doesn't have a good grasp of finances and how things work. Wish you well
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/22 02:05 AM
1

If she has no income, or some large savings hidden somewhere then I suppose she cant. It sounds like selling it is the only solution.
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/22 01:51 AM
2

Have it appraised. Take appraisal minus what you owe on it, and split that. She can add your half to a new mortgage in just her name and give you your half.
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/22 01:46 AM
10

My children's Christmas presents are sitting under the tree. However, she is keeping the children from me due to a frivolous OP. I'm not sure if my kids will get Christmas with me. That's my Christmas setup. But... I'd say you buy your gifts, she buys hers
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/22 09:32 PM
4

So will I. It was said loud enough for everybody to hear. My attorney texted me later saying that was the most egregious and out of line behavior he's ever seen in court.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/22 01:19 AM
4

No idea how it'll play out. If the court reporter transcribed his threat, then I assume we'll file a complaint with the state board. Not ideal no matter the outcome
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/22 12:42 AM
5

Sadly yes, but maybe she'll eventually have to pay those fees. Maybe
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 11:34 PM
1

I have a full time job, and several side hustles. I'm not a bum in any sense of the word.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 08:42 PM
21

Sure thing...You know why we end up here right 😂
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/22 10:00 PM
25

Yea, roles are reversed. She makes 3x more than me
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/22 09:50 PM
14

I mean, I make normal money working a full time job, but she makes 100k+ and doesn't want to pay either.
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/22 09:20 PM
17

It pained me so much to be nice but I wanted to tell her.... "Sounds to me like you need a part time job, with your child support and maintenance payments".
/r/Divorce_Men07/12/22 09:19 PM
16

If you want someone to talk to, msg me. I felt those same feelings when I was in your shoes 6 months ago.
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/22 11:45 PM
1

Is there anyway to get a judge to force the sale of a home? I'm in a situation where she filed, but wanted me out. She wants to keep the house, but can't afford to pay CS or Maintenance because of needing to refi. While she could cash out her retirement or something stupid to stay there and buy out my house, it'd leave her cash-strapped monthly to pay CS/Maintenance.
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/22 12:41 PM
6

Call me old fashioned, but I'll stick with the real thing
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/22 02:24 PM
3

This! New girls are seemingly willing to please I've found, quite a contrast to what I had been accustomed!
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/22 01:15 PM
1

Well, if its consolation... At least I know there were some others in the same sinking boat. How screwed over did you get?
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/22 03:35 AM
8

Beginning to see that... 😔
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/22 01:40 AM
2

No, it's already been filed here. There's just one large city in our county, mostly rural area.
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/22 01:39 AM
2

They are good advice. It's so hard not to take it personally. We built our dream home, and wanted to have our kids enjoy living there forever. She made a lot more than I did, and filed. I know it's in my best interest to hold her accountable for support, maintenance even if that means she cant afford to stay there. Just hard to imagine my kids being uprooted, such is life I guess.
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/22 07:18 PM
5

Already in the crummy apartment. It's too bad, we built the home abiut 6 years ago to be close to her parents, just sucks for the kids, mainly I'm just venting out loud :(
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/22 03:00 PM
2

This is what I'm having a tough time with I guess. My living situation is temporary and it's hard to envision it after everything is settled. I think it's my best bet to go for 50/50 now, I'd ideally like every other week. Probably best to leave the pmags out of the equation.
/r/Divorce_Men30/11/22 03:53 AM
1

Thing is, she makes 4x what I do. I'm scraping by as it is. There's no way I could afford childcare while I'm at work, also 2 of the children go to school 30 minutes away. It's almost more convenient the way it is, but I'm already facing some but out after 6 months of this arrangement.
/r/Divorce_Men30/11/22 03:03 AM
2

Fighting through this now. I estimate all household items, appliances etc. around 60k. My attorney filed a motion for her to have a detailed inventory list created by a local auction company with estimated values. Still waiting...
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/22 12:26 PM
3

Thanks. It seems to be a little bit of an atypical process. I don't have anyone I know that's had to go this route.
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/22 03:02 AM
2

That's a route I hadn't considered. My attorney had always sent me everything provided by her attorney. Her financial interrogatories were filled out but with no statements attached.
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/22 03:00 AM
5

She has told me she's given her attorney everything. My attorney says he hasn't been given a single bank statement. I have no clue what is true anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/22 02:47 AM
2

Not yet, he sprung it on me today while we were talking. I'd never given it any thought
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/22 02:17 AM
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