Male Suicide: a Hidden Epidemic (article I wrote/designed)

littleelf · 2012-11-27T13:33:32+00:00

Being a 23 year old man without a job or a car I can say that this is all pretty accurate. I've been planning to kill myself for a while. Anybody who doesn't treat me like a bum treats me like a child. I always feel hollow and isolated, like I'm not even human. Being around people, especially women, is a nightmare. When ever I try to talk to anyone I'm always told stuff like "Quit bitching" and "Alpha Up".

Sasha_ · 2012-11-27T12:42:43+00:00

Very, very nice design. Thank you.

A couple of points about your messaging though; I see a lot of articles about male suicide that in an odd way place the blame on men, saying that men need to 'open up' or change in some way.

What's important to remember is that men quite often signal distress, the problem is more that people around them either don't recognise or don't really care. For instance you'd be surprised at how many wives/partners will take a man's children, home and income, and not for a moment consider the impact on his mental or emotional health.

Women especially are very unlikely to be sympathetic to a depressed man, seeing it as weakness to be despised.

In many ways I believe a better campaign would be to 'innoculate' young men and boys against suicide by building their resilience. For instance if young men were educated about the immense risks of marriage, they'd be more likely to build up savings, keep finances separate, maintain a support network, not become emotionally dependent etc.

Just the simple fact that women initiate most divorces is unknown to the public and would make a big impact I think (one fact you don't mention is that separated and divorced men are at particular risk).

Simultaneously educating women as to their responsibility not to verbally, emotionally and psychologically abuse their partner would help, as would educating men that this behaviour IS abuse and about constructive ways to seek help in language they understand (i.e. 'tantrums 24/7? Screaming and shouting? Giving you the stink eye while watching the soaps? Now threatening to take the kids to her mom's? Pulled a knife on 'ya? Pull up a chair and join the club pal...call xxxxxxx.").

Just some ideas anyway.

checkraze · 2012-11-27T17:14:33+00:00

I've experienced these double standards first hand with my own battle with depression. My family and friends responded to me negatively, my mother told me to 'man up' and my father told me to stop 'being a p****'. During the same time, they were sympathetic and supportive of my aunt who was also going through depression. Their actions only reaffirmed my beliefs that I was a broken and useless individual, causing the worst episode of depression in my life. I was suicidal, and only through the support of my aunt was I able to seek help and stop blaming myself. After my diagnosis and treatment, and a few counseling sessions, I once again internalized my struggle. Now Im medicated and armed to battle my condition, but I havnt told anybody about it since my diagnosis. My friends and family have no clue about my daily struggle, because im afraid of the stigma that is attached to male emotions.

2012-11-27T12:19:41+00:00

Antiquated notions of male strength have such massive negative effects on society -- for men and women.

2012-11-27T16:39:14+00:00

That's extremely well-designed. You've put a lot of thought into this, and I just want to say thanks for doing it, and thanks for bringing these issues to people's attention. As someone who has suffered from depression the majority of his life, these thoughts and emotions ring very close to home.

It's especially nice to see articles and pictures, that actually focus on men; and put men as their priority, becasue even though many claim they do, they don't. 90% og these ads and articles, start with acknowledging women's pains and bringing them up, before even beginning to address male issues, even if helping men is their sole purpose. Why? When it comes to danger, pain, or suffering in general: Women first. It's an unwritten rule that most people feel like they have to defer to, lest they be called out by the angry masses. There is only one word for it: It's unfair. And sometimes, as a reader of articles that compulsively throw female statistics at you, it feels like your own pain is being undermined and trivialized. Because the article may be telling you that your problems suck, but it is also telling you indirectly that there is an entire group of people out there, whose pains are far greater than yours, and whose problems are far more deserving of attention and aid.

It's nice to have something that is just for me for a change. Something that addresses my feelings and issues. I don't think people are aware how often it happens, or how these small things matter. But you have done a great job.

double-happiness · 2012-11-27T18:01:29+00:00

Nice. It's good to see some well-chosen visuals as so much MRA stuff involves reams of text or YouTube videos of someone talking to camera, it does get tiring at times.

A couple of bits of feedback:

"Work is much less secure now and periods of unemplyment are the norm. Many men only achieve financial indepence in their mid to late twenties". Not sure what that is based on, how accurate, or how that compares to women? Maybe it would help to focus on work as a disprortionate source of status, satisfaction and pride for men? Could it be that women have a greater 'buffer' against unemployment and financial dependence such as outside interests and the support of family / friends?
Perhaps I'm missing something but I can't see the difference between pages 1 and 2? They look much the same to me. Would like to see Facebook and Twitter buttons for easy sharing, also a text-only equivalent for visually impaired users and easy copy-paste.

Good work anyway, impressive.

2012-11-27T17:56:20+00:00

Beautiful design, excellent message. You're raising the bar for production quality. Can I reprint and post these?

willowsonthespot · 2012-11-27T18:32:33+00:00

I have said it before and I will say it again everyone wears a mask. It is there weather you believe it or not. I lost a friend because he wore his too well and ended up killing himself. Everyone has a mask they use to hide things from others as well as themselves and some don't even know it. I know I have worn many in my life and some are really dangerous and can cause you to end your life.

If you're depressed and think " I can pull out of this on my own" talk to someone at the very least, otherwise it could lead down a path that you won't like. If you have lost someone or something dear to you don't just turn inward and think you can do it on your own, that will do nothing but prolong your suffering. If you are suicidal get help ASAP! it's no joke get help weather it be friends, family, or a doctor do something ASAP!

I have been through a lot of shit in the last year and a half with loosing 2 loved ones and all. Both times I tried to stay around my friends and family, but I still put on my mask though I know it's there this time. I have been suicidal over these past years and have seen the signs that it was getting worse as I spiraled down. I have completely lost my will to live but try to hide that from myself for my own good.

I don't care if anyone agrees or disagrees with me, I just want you to look in the mirror and see what you are hiding from yourself and from everyone else.

2012-11-27T22:13:40+00:00

Good graphic, but it feels like it's missing a few factors here and there.

What about soldiers with PTSD?
What about divorced men?
What about men who grew up with no father?

I don't know the exact stats, but those could also be worth a look

2012-11-28T00:49:02+00:00

The design looks cool, but the image with the eye and that says boys don't cry really looks like a condom box. Seriously - that's the only image that came into my mind.

djwork · 2012-11-28T03:45:54+00:00

You should also include that a significant part of the road toll may be suicide in disguise

rageblock · 2012-11-28T08:19:20+00:00

This is one of the reasons why I don't give a flying flaming frick flailing fudge fuck about the amada thing Also you're welcomed to add to the F list

Title	Male Suicide: a Hidden Epidemic (article I wrote/designed)
Author	wawaeatfresh
Upvotes	93
Comments	44
Date	November 27, 2012 11:24 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/13vap9/male_suicide_a_hidden_epidemic_article_i/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/male-suicide-a-hidden-epidemic-article-i.1008212 https://theredarchive.com/post/1008212

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