xpost: Dude gets cuckolded, reddit white knights advise him to stay with wife "for the kid"

GorillaJ · 2011-01-24T13:10:24+00:00

She only came clean because she had to - she would have taken this secret to the grave if she could have. She's not sorry at all, just sorry she got caught out. Shameful.

erok81 · 2011-01-24T10:24:47+00:00

That's just sick. The worst part of this is, should he every divorce his wife, is that in some states he'll be on the hook for child support if he signed the birth certificate. In my state, you have two years after you sign the certificate to avoid paying for someone else's child, which pretty much fucks over any man who doesn't get a paternity test ASAP.

adriankotsi · 2011-01-24T20:07:24+00:00

I am really surprised at the lack of compassion for if the dad wanted to leave the wife and kid on that post, and in these comments.

We all have a finite amount of time on this earth. Some of us have dreams, goals, and have existential crises that they want to work through before their time is done. Speaking from experience, I could never be as close to step-kids as my biological kids - and that's that. Will it suck for the son if the dad left? Fuck yeah it would. Would it suck for the dad if he was 80 lying on his deathbed wishing he had more time to accomplish his goals and follow his dreams? Hell yeah it would suck.

IMO, it's not always a bad thing if someone acts a bit selfish, if they have to.

ignatiusloyola · 2011-01-24T17:55:43+00:00

You know, there is nothing wrong with staying with the kid.

I posted a comment, but I am sure it will get lost in the thread. My point was that she did very seriously harm their relationship, but if they do love each other then they may be able to overcome that. She has a lot of making up to do, but I don't believe that this is necessarily enough reason to divorce if there are enough other reasons to stay in the marriage.

Marriages and relationships are hard work - it is not reasonable to expect someone to throw away years of effort for a single mistake, even a large one. Some may do it, but others may decide to try to work past it. I don't condone or dismiss either.

If the guy wants to stay a part of the child's life, then good on him. He is providing a better home for the child, as so many people here argue - a two parent household is better for a child than a single parent household. And many parents adopt kids, how is this any different?

He has to choose his new relationship with the kid. And that should be independent of his relationship with his wife, which will take a new course also.

untogethered · 2011-01-24T16:10:47+00:00

People aren't advising him to stay with the wife. They're advising him to still be the kid's father. Big difference.

Bobsutan · 2011-01-24T15:46:55+00:00

[permanently deleted]

AncientGates · 2011-01-24T12:57:19+00:00

I wish we lived in a world where paternity tests were REQUIRED. It sure would stop these kind of awful situations.

Leprecon · 2011-01-24T18:10:58+00:00

Your wife may be the biggest cunt on earth for doing this, but your son is your son no matter what.

Top comment. People think the wife is a bitch, but the son is his son regardless. You can't love a child for so many years and then back out because your DNA doesn't match. His wife cheated, but that is not the sons fault.

Some of the highly rated comments;

I see a lot of comments telling you to forgive your wife, but fuck that. [...] Staying with your wife for the sake of the child is the absolute worst thing you could do.

.

Leave the woman, stick around for the boy.

.

Ditch your wife, and get a divorce. The bond of trust is destroyed, and you can't have a good relationship without it.

huntwhales · 2011-01-24T13:14:25+00:00

99% sure that's a troll. He won't answer what disease it is, and commentors in the medical field have never heard of doing tests on both parents to see if someone has a disease.

Nonetheless, I'd say Reddit was split close to 50/50 on whether he should leave or not.

Spacedoubt · 2011-01-24T16:15:39+00:00

I think I would just leave. Fuck that situation. I'd start my life over somewhere else. Maybe it's mean, maybe it's cruel, maybe it's selfish...but we can't all be white knights.

ss_camaro · 2011-01-24T23:59:21+00:00

I feel terrible for the kid. His dad is no longer able to call him his son (in thread he calls him 'the boy'), thanks to something that happened before he was born. Kids don't care who conceived them. How fucked will he be, emotionally, if this dissolves his entire family? Best case scenario here is that the dad realises that this is his son, regardless of genetics, and ensures that whatever happens his son is the priority. No, that doesn't mean staying with the wife (and I don't see many posts in the thread saying that, they're saying he should prioritise his son), but it does mean making sure that the counselling/divorce/whatever happens as smoothly as possible.

Bobsutan · 2011-01-24T16:20:07+00:00

At a minimum he's due some compensation. Kick out the ex, sue her into oblivion, keep the kid. Not necessarily in that order. This is one of the cases that if I were on a jury for a guy beating the shit out of his wife, I'd have to let him off for "heat of the moment" if not outright perfectly justified.

More food for thought...

http://roissy.wordpress.com/2009/12/03/cuckoldry-vs-butt-rape

RussianDeathWorm · 2011-01-24T13:14:06+00:00

Guys, he's gone so far in life with this woman. Is it really worth it just to drop it now and hurt the kid? Doesn't that seem cruel.

Just kidding, dump that bitch, forget about the kid and go to Vegas.

MensRightsClown · 2011-01-24T18:16:51+00:00

Stay with the wife for the kid? Ha! How about beat her into a coma for the kid. That's the gift that keeps on giving.

Comments