while I don't agree with cheating, I don't agree with the general sentiment of "man up and deal with a sexless marriage" message. You guys want to chime in?

DreadPirateHenry · 2011-01-06T23:02:05+00:00

Cheating and resignation aren't the only two options.

Get out.

Quazz · 2011-01-06T23:35:09+00:00

I'd send the woman to a doctor and probably go to counseling if the doctor doesn't find anything wrong.

I thought marriage was all about making sacrifices. A compromise would be what I'd bargain for in such a situation.

perpetualvictim · 2011-01-07T01:02:19+00:00

Huh? I find these kind of calls for support distasteful, and that's really not the general sentiment of that thread at all. People are telling him to talk to her, to try separating. The one poster who flamed him saying his sex addiction ruined his family was downvoted, so were others. Some posters think it would be fine for him to get sex on the side if his wife agreed, and she sounds like someone who might.

The thing people dislike is that he already had an affair and is well pleased with himself for it, before he talked stuff out. He claims to feel guilty but it's pretty obviously fake; he feels totally justified, both in his affair and his lack of courage to just talk to his wife plainly. This guy wants approval from internet strangers badly and that in itself is sort of sad.

jdgalt · 2011-01-07T03:29:25+00:00

It seems to me that sex is part of the marriage deal. If I were married and my wife decided she didn't want sex any more, I might or might not leave her, but at the very least I'd let her know she can no longer expect "fidelity", and if that's a problem for her, she can go away.

(The worst thing about no-fault divorce laws is that they ended divorce-with-fault cases, so you have to give her half the property and half the income even if she's clearly the at-fault party.)

2011-01-07T11:48:53+00:00

There is a certain requirement on both parties to try to keep the oathsd they took to one another.

But once you get past the good faith of trying, then it's time to declare an end.

Sex and intimacy are required for a healthy mind, it's not suprising that once marriages become sexless that one or both partners seek such intimacy in the arms of another.

heliosxx · 2011-01-06T23:02:45+00:00

Not sure if that statement is clear enough. What I'm seeing is people telling this guy that he should deny that needs sex so as to appease his wife's lack of desire rather her sacrificing for him.

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