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A female men's rights advocate: "I cannot in good conscience refer to myself as 'the victim'"

justintrottier

June 16, 2009

37 upvotes

/r/MensRights

http://www.equalismactivism.com/?p=1824

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Title	A female men's rights advocate: "I cannot in good conscience refer to myself as 'the victim'"
Author	justintrottier
Upvotes	37
Comments	22
Date	June 16, 2009 3:01 PM UTC (17 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/8sz4q/a_female_mens_rights_advocate_i_cannot_in_good/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/a-female-mens-rights-advocate-i-cannot-in-good.1053798 https://theredarchive.com/post/1053798

Comments

[–]AnnArchist 6 points7 points8 points 17 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link

[–]tomek77 5 points6 points7 points 17 years ago* (8 children) | Copy Link

[–]AnnArchist 1 point2 points3 points 17 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

[–]tomek77 6 points7 points8 points 17 years ago* (5 children) | Copy Link

I think you might be if you knew what the family courts can do to you!

Of course you know that Mommy can take the kids away anytime, and the courts will not enforce your visitation rights (assuming you have them).

You also know that you will be required to pay child support. But do you know that you still pay taxes on your total income (including CS), and you get absolutely no tax breaks or benefits of any kind? Also do you have an idea of how much child support would be? Google "child support calculator" and don't forget to add medical costs and daycare costs.

As an example if you make $100,000 in NY state. You will pay $33,000 in child support and $30,000 in taxes. You will be left with $37,000 or $3,083 per month. Mommy will receive $660,000 tax-free over 20 years, plus be eligible for all kind of welfare and tax breaks.

But this is only if you are lucky enough to have your job for 20 years. What happens if you lose your job? In 95% of cases, nothing happens, you still have to pay CS at the same rate as when you had a job. And if you don't: you will be jailed, slapped with a felony, your driving license and passport revoked; all the while the CS agencies add penalties and interest to your account faster than a credit card company.

So many fathers have no choice but to save money for the times when they will be unemployed. If you consider that you might be unemployed 2 months every 2 years, you need to save 1 month of CS every year. In our hypothetical example: this is $2,800 per year which leaves a guy making $100k and having just one child with as little as $2,800 per month to live in NYC.

Now imagine what happens if you don't make $100k!

Finally you should know that child support debt cannot be reduced by any judge (google the "Bradley amendment") or bankruptcy. If you debt spirals out of control, you will have no choice than to go underground (like millions of men did)

[–]rmbarnes 1 point2 points3 points 17 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]tomek77 2 points3 points4 points 17 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

To answer your questions:

Yes, it is fucked up!!

No, the UK is definitely not as bad - I checked the CS guidelines in many english-speaking countries, because I am planning on getting out of here :)

In the US, the amount of payments collected directly influences the amount of federal money received by the family courts (and they typically are funded entirely with those funds). This is like paying judges based on the number of guilty convictions! Of course in order to maximize the payments collected: shared parenting is a no-go, visitation rights are reduced to a minimum, and child support guidelines bare no resemblance to the cost of raising a child.

The average cost of raising a kid is around $240k for a family. Since you are responsible for 1/2 that: $120k. So the $660k that you pay is $120k child support, and $540k "hidden" alimony.

In order to get a brake with your job loss, you need to hire an attorney (at $400 / hr), and wait for your day in court (could be as long as 6 months). According to nation-wide statistics: 95% of such requests are denied.

Yes, this is a typical reason for male suicide. There was several high profile cases with entertainers and basketball players who killed themselves after being thoroughly ruined by child support payments in just a few years (imagine paying $100,000 per month in child support). Some requested a modification in child support order a dozen times, and were denied a dozen times. They didn't even have a place to live when they took their own lives.

An Australian study found that divorce and the loss of one's children is the number one cause of male suicide there. In the US, no funds were allocated to study male suicide (which is 85% of all suicide).

Yes, you are right if the woman shacks with a millionaire, your payments are the same BUT if the guy has a new wife or live-in gf, they will take the income of the wife/gf into consideration and raise his CS.

Many men and their families live in sub-human conditions, after paying child support. Many men are forced into homelessness, or move back with their parents. If they have kids with the new wife, this is not taken into consideration by the courts!

Welcome to matriarchy USA!

[–]rmbarnes 1 point2 points3 points 17 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]tomek77 2 points3 points4 points 17 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

Court officials are not elected, and the media completely fails to report on men's issues.

The root of the problem are the myriad of extremely powerful, organized and very well funded feminist groups (that are often cloaked as DV organizations or reproductive health clinics, etc...). These groups get billions of taxpayers dollars, and use some of the money to carry out a vicious anti-male agenda.

To give you an example: I needed an STD-check in my area, so I call the "reproductive health clinic" closest to my home. As soon as the lady hears my (male) voice, her tone changes from friendly to very unfriendly, before telling me that this clinic is for women only. I called another one: same thing. I call their headquarters, describe my problem, and they tell me someone will take my complaint, then put me on hold, until I give up and hang up. On their website: they state that they care for both men and women, and they receive federal funding.

At the end of the day, it comes down to money, man-hating feminist have an insane amount of federal money to spend on their agenda. Men's groups have volunteers working for free, no funding whatsoever, and zero media coverage!

[–]tomek77 0 points1 point2 points 17 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]rsho 0 points1 point2 points 17 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Varo -5 points-4 points-3 points 17 years ago (14 children) | Copy Link

[–]tomek77 5 points6 points7 points 17 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link

[–]Varo -2 points-1 points0 points 17 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link

[–]tomek77 7 points8 points9 points 17 years ago* (9 children) | Copy Link

Copied from a google search (notice that the quotes are from official leaders of the movement, not fringe lunatics, also notice that the "destruction of marriage" and the "rewriting of history in terms of victimhood" have pretty much happened today)

Modern feminists would have us believe that they are interested in equality, their actions and statements prove otherwise.

Their hatred of the so-called 'patriarchy', knows no bounds, even in the face of no evidence to support their theory that MEN have conspired against them.

"I feel that man-hating is an honorable and viable political act." - Robin Morgan, Editor 'Ms. Magazine'

"We cant destroy the 'inequalities' between men and women until we destroy marriage" - Robin Morgan

"Since marriage constitutes slavery for women, it is clear that the women's movement must concentrate on attacking this institution. 'Freedom' for women cannot be won until the abolition of marriage" - Sheila Cronin, leader of the feminist organization N.O.W. (National Organization of Women)

"Men who are unjustly accused of rape can gain from the experience" - Catherine Comins

"My feelings for men are the result of my experience. I have little sympathy for them. LIke a Jew just released Dachau, I watched the handsome young Nazi officer fall writhing to the ground with a bullet to the stomach and I look briefly and walk on. I dont even need to shrug. I simply dont care. What he was, as a person, I mean, what his shames and yearnings were, simply dont matter." - Marlyn French, The Woman's Room.

"All men are rapists and that's all they are" - Marlyn French, Authoress (Later Advisoress to Al Gore's Presidential Campaign)

"The simple fact that every woman must be willing to be identified as lesbian to be fully feminist" - (National NOW Times, January, 1988)

"Marriage has existed for the benefit of men, and has been a legally sanctioned method of control over women... We must work to destroy it. The end of the institution of marriage is a neccessary condition for the 'liberation' of women. Therefore it is important for us to encourage women to leave thier husbands and not to live individually with men.... All of history must be re-written in terms of 'oppression' of women. We must go back to ancient female religions like WITCHCRAFT" - (From "The Declaration of Feminism", November, 1971)

"I claim that rape exists anytime sexual intercourse occurs when it is not initiated by the woman, out of her own genuine affection and desire" - Robin Morgan

[–]Varo -1 points0 points1 point 17 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

[–]tomek77 5 points6 points7 points 17 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

[–]Varo -2 points-1 points0 points 17 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

[–]tomek77 5 points6 points7 points 17 years ago* (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]Varo -2 points-1 points0 points 17 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]tomek77 4 points5 points6 points 17 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]BestServedCold 2 points3 points4 points 17 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]kanuk876[🍰] 0 points1 point2 points 17 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link