Post from r/menslib of trans man's experience after transitioning

thereslcjg2000 · 2020-01-11T00:23:36+00:00

I’m actually really impressed. That’s quite probably the best menslib discussion I’ve ever seen. A few comments dismissing the fears of being seen as “creepy”, but far fewer than I’m used to, and next to no “well we women have it worse” comments.

I relate very strongly to his fears of being seen as a creep and of being alone in the world. Those are very common male fears. However, the feminist “men are perpetrators, women are victims” narrative doubtless contributes greatly to the feeling. I feel like menslib’s inability to acknowledge this flaw is a little counterintuitive.

Dunkolunko · 2020-01-11T00:32:41+00:00

This is an issue with women being unable to empathize with being a pursuer in dating or the thought of being percieved poorly for it. They will call an awkward guy a creep or a guy trying to flirt a pervert with no regard for whether they would be the same if they were a man. It's all great to sit in your ivory tower where propositions flock to you and you can pick or dismiss them at will, they are almost incapable of perceiving the sheer loneliness, humiliation and discomfort of being a man in this scenario who is not impervious to social shaming or particularly attractive or charismatic naturally. And feminism tells them everything is men's fault so they are discouraged from even trying.

mewacketergi · 2020-01-11T02:54:15+00:00

I propose a new community guideline, u/AmberEjaculator — if one is cross-posting something from 'slib to a less forcefully ideologically-conformist space, one should use either Removeddit or ceddit to look through the censored comments, and repost here any that were interesting, well-argued or insightful.

I like these ones:

LOL welcome to being a man! this proves being trans isnt a choice btw because what woman in her right mind would give up all that privilege willingly?

If you were told that men have it easier than women, now you know the truth.

Edit: Phrasing.

2020-01-11T00:52:04+00:00

His point about having "to be talented in order to make it in the world" really resonates with me. I've always felt as if I have to justify my existence. I'm not a man unless I have property, or otherwise something outside of myself, to display.

Sonic-Oj · 2020-01-11T00:54:44+00:00

And.......it's locked.

bkrugby78 · 2020-01-11T03:39:40+00:00

It reminds me of something that comes up in my head, in discussion of trans issues. I feel as though when discussion of trans individuals comes up, the vast majority of the time, it is about trans women, those transitioning from male to female. I almost never see any discussion or concern for the transition of individuals of those who were women becoming men. Perhaps it is just those I follow in twitter and/or subscribe to on Reddit, it just isn't important. But I wonder if maybe other factors are at play.

Sewblon · 2020-01-11T03:52:17+00:00

-I’m very egalitarian and don’t like the idea of “men having to pursue women” or men having to be more dominant, but am struggling realizing ill literally be forever alone if I don’t do these things.

You don't necessarily need to be more dominant to be romantically successful. But you do need to pursue women. Waiting for them to come to you doesn't work, at least, it didn't work for me.

z770i1 · 2020-01-11T00:34:49+00:00

I wish i could like that post, but can't.

Ryunysus · 2020-01-11T10:15:17+00:00

Trans men see sexism from both sides tbh. Something about trans activism that kinda bothers me is how under-represented they are, trans activism hardly represents trans men and their issues (I could be wrong tho, it's just how I see the movement). Most prominent TRAs I see are either trans women or non-binary people, but where are the trans men?? You have heard of terms like 'transmisogyny' (hate against trans women) but did you hear about transmisandry? These things make me really question stuff. I have read somewhere that some trans men don't want to be associated with the trans/queer communities because they receive flak from the community for their "male privilege".

Post from r/menslib of trans man's experience after transitioning

Crosspost "Struggling since I started passing as a man" from /r/MensLib:

Comments

Title	Post from r/menslib of trans man's experience after transitioning
Author	AmberEjaculator
Upvotes	24
Comments	23
Date	January 11, 2020 12:06 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/comments/emzmnt/post_from_rmenslib_of_trans_mans_experience_after/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/post-from-rmenslib-of-trans-mans-experience-after.1064186 https://theredarchive.com/post/1064186