Hello everyone,

A couple months ago I made a post on having baby fever. This hasn’t gone away at all. It has actually gotten worse now that I’m considering being a SAHM. I am very in love with my fiancé and I am seriously considering trying for a baby with him the summer of next year when we get married. I am 19 and he is 20. I am in college right now and having doubts about going to medical school as well. I don’t feel I am self sabotaging with these thoughts or anything. If I continue what I’m doing right now I will go to medical school in the fall of next year.

We’re living together and everything has been perfect. I love waking up and going to sleep with him every night. Every day is like a fun little adventure and I’m really happy with him. I love all how he protective he is, how he takes care of me, and how he loves and worships me and treats me like a queen. I’m not sure what’s happening with me, my body. It’s an indescribable feeling how much I desire a baby with him. Things have always been very intimate between us since we met, but somehow things continue to get hotter and more intimate. I can’t get my hands off of him. So I would be lying if there wasn’t a romantic reason behind my desire of starting a family with him. It is very obvious that he has all the qualities that will make him an amazing father.

I also feel that it also logically makes sense. We’ve spoken about finances extensively since we will be married soon. He used to not disclose anything financial before. But now we talk about it/he shows me it open. To sum it up, I can be a SAHM as my job permanently as he’s been successful in his ventures. I’ve talked to him about all of what I’m feeling. He says that it ultimately is my choice and he is supportive of whatever I decide to do, whether it’s going to med school and having a baby when my career is established like we had planned earlier, having a baby and being a SAHM. He also mentioned that I don’t really have to choose. I can go to med school and we can still have a baby pretty soon. Many women have a baby during the last year of med school, which is a little more relaxed than the first 3 years.

But I’ve also had some doubts about going to med school. Sometimes I find myself studying for an exam or something, and I just ask myself what am I doing? When what I truly want is to be a SAHM. There are other shorter more child friendly careers like nursing I can do, but at the same time I don’t want to sell myself short. I also want to be a doctor at the same time too. I’ve wanted to be a doctor ever since I was little. And of course having a baby right now would make the pathway to being a doctor harder. I know this all sounds confusing but this is just how I feel currently.

There is also a risk of course in being a stay at home mom. He is clearly in love with me right now and has been throughout the more than 2 years we’ve been together.But this can change. Maybe in the future he’ll wake up and ask himself why he committed to someone so early in his life, or he wakes up from the spell that is love and decides he wants to play the field and find someone prettier, smarter. I try my best to be attractive for him. I’m in the best shape of my life, and he has some fetishes like lingerie and feet which I go along with. But I like it though. Of course if he gets bored of me it’s not really on me. It’s more on him and I can’t really do anything about it. But it would suck to be a SAHM and in 5 or 10 years he gets bored and I get screwed out of child support for some unknown reason. Then i would be stuck without the love of my life and have no job prospects as my bachelors degree is useless with our child. So there is some risk to this.

If I were to “follow my heart” right now I would tell him I want to start trying literally right now. Of course I won’t do this as this is immature and irresponsible. I can wait till we get married. But I also know at the same time, like he said, that I don’t really have to choose, I can be a doctor and we can still have a baby pretty soon. So I don’t really have to choose or compromise on anything. I would just like some outside advice on this. It’s not really a bad problem to have. Other people will have more severe problems they have to deal with I know. I’m just feeling a little confused and would like some outside advice. Thank you for reading.