The red pill is really hard to grasp

atleastitsnotaids · 2014-02-09T05:28:54+00:00

This is going to sound annoyingly repetitive, but you really need to understand this...

lift

You are never going to feel confident, attractive and happy until you make this an every day activity. I don't want to sound judgemental but just from reading your post I get the feeling that you are not in good shape. I don't know if you are a fat slob or a skinnyfat autist, but I can tell that you aren't walking around with a chiseled body that makes women nudge their friend and nod in your direction, because if you were you wouldn't be making this post.

So many guys are led to this sub because they are unhappy with their lives, especially when it comes to women, and they read all of the posts hoping that they will eventually find some cheat code that makes them into an 'alpha' instantly. There is no cheat code. There is no cheat code.

If you were planning on avoiding this step, then just leave now. You're never going to get there. Go read some amateur hour PUA blog that tells you all about how you can pull 10s even though you're not attractive yourself.

How about this. You log off the red pill entirely for a few months. Better yet reddit entirely. Spend that time going to the gym 5 days a week, reading a few good books, and trying to pick up a new talent like playing an instrument. Don't even worry about women at all. After a few months come back and let us know if you are still having trouble with your internal game.

RedBigMan · 2014-02-09T05:06:19+00:00

You sound like you are sick of dealing with women. Perhaps you might just want to do MGTOW for a little while. Realizing you do not need a woman in your life can help you make the other steps necessary for internalizing other aspects of TRP.

You have to improve yourself before you can improve your situation. That's why so much advice here is eat well, lift, approach women and fuck more women.

Women aren't special... remember there's about 4 billion of them out there. Approach it from an abundance mentality. You dont need to go out hunting unicorns (which dont really exist) just find some women you like to hang out with and fuck.

YouDislikeMyOpinion · 2014-02-09T06:21:31+00:00

Worst case scenario is that you find your unicorn and you learn that she's not a unicorn.

I have never really had a real relationship anyway

There's your problem right there.

You know what's funny? I know so many guys who are complete players and alphas, and you want to know what their weakness is? They still believe it. It's still in them. They haven't been in a real long relationship.

Now you see, I had my long relationship in life where I tried everything at 110% and it still failed. So I have unfailable proof that the formula does not equal 100% love+effort = happiness. You don't. And I'm not sure that I as a person would ever fully believe it unless I went through it personally.

Thought experiment for you: that ex did everything I wanted, cooked, cleaned, my sex-toy, initiated sexy 3 times a day, A's in university at the time. Did I mention she was hot?. Why did I break up? If you don't know the potential reasons, then you're not mature enough yet; you don't know women well enough yet.

eccentricrealist · 2014-02-09T08:02:56+00:00

Hey, man, prostitution is one of the most honest relationships there are.

elderstorm · 2014-02-09T05:07:16+00:00

Your biggest challenge in this is not women themselves. It's your mind. Your brain will fight change. You're your own enemy pretty much. I think also having never had a relationship contributes to it as well.

2014-02-09T06:52:46+00:00

Here's what I take from TRP and related subreddits like /r/becomeaman

Disregard bitches, acquire self-respect: It's simple. You know what you want, so you go and get what you want. Don't try to fit in, you gotta dive and make your own place.
Women are like children: They behave like children. Do whatever the fuck they want and give no fuck about consequences. So you treat them like kids. Just don't imagine that when you're bruising her ovaries though. That's just weird.
Be active, not passive: It's the difference between being alpha and beta. Betas simply surf the waves of Alphas. So make your own god damn waves.

So you speak about having trouble switching your mindset. Honestly, the best way to do it is to not give a fuck. Not a single one. Someone's being an ass around you? Call him out on his bullshit. You gotta go through the female underwear department to go get those comfy shoes at Wal-Mart? Don't walk all around it just because "it'd be weird." Fuck them, let them think what they want, they won't remember you in 5 minutes anyway.

You're the most important person in the world to yourself. Act like it.

real-boethius · 2014-02-09T09:15:09+00:00

It's hard and the hardest thing is letting go of the false dreams and facing up to reality.

You will die one day.
There are no unicorns.
Women are how they are. At a first approximation, they are like children. Confiding in a woman is like confiding in a 4 year old.
You are fundamentally alone.
You cannot rely on anyone but yourself.
You have to create your own meaning. It cannot come from elsewhere if it is to be authentic.
You have always lived in a sea of lies.
There is no short cut. You need to do the hard work. You will slip back again and again. Again and again you need to pick yourself up and work out where you got it wrong and do it again.

GayLubeOil · 2014-02-09T06:32:43+00:00

this will make it easy to grsap.

Pushnikov · 2014-02-10T04:42:13+00:00

First, more SEX is not going to make you TRP. You can fuck 500 bitches and still be "beta". Sex is just a nice carrot that TRP puts on the end of the stick because most guys are deprived and can relate with the success of SEX with the success of manliness. Even the most manly guy feels like a bitch if he can't get pussy on demand.

The most valuable lesson that encapsulates TRP for a "beta personality" is :

If you ask a woman what she wants in a man :: "I want him to be nice and I want him to be able to make him laugh"

There is a semantic issue for a woman and failure in addressing the question to a woman's mind to get the answer you want.

'What she wants in a "MAN"' is the problem clause here. In her mind, women are already attracted to "MEN". But she doesn't see all males as "MEN", and she does not see them as all attractive. If you aren't attractive, subconsciously, you aren't a "MAN" to her. You might be a friend, or a colleague, or whatever she wants to label you, but not a MAN.

It's about phrasing the question differently and seeing the result of reshaping the question.

So, what she wants in an MALE SHE FINDS ATTRACTIVE is that he is nice and makes her laugh. Why? Because it VALIDATES HER. She wants the strong personality to tell her that she is accepted. Why? Because it means that her reliance on social structure for her survival is secured. Subconsciously AND consciously - she KNOWS that she would die in the wild without society. She is faced with this every day, and she doesn't like it - and generally doesn't feel a desire to fix it as long as it's easier to find someone who can make that easy for her.

For most girls, their father defines a "MAN" as they were growing up. They associate what that attraction means with that figure. And how does a father treat his daughter or any child? Like a child. That is how she expects a man to treat her. If that fatherly figure is absent or ineffective a situation is created where she doesn't respect most "MEN". Women are very susceptible to Stockholm Syndrome and other disorders that make them adapt to their environment at a young age. For example, abuse at a young age for girls neurologically "primes" women to get "happy hormones" from abusive situations, rather than "stress hormones". One of the reasons women from abusive pasts prefer abusive relationships. Boys don't respond like that (this is a scientific study, citation will have to be dug up).

Being a personality that we call "beta" around here means that you aren't trying to live up to that "MAN"/"FATHER" Paradigm that many women have come to expect from a relationship dynamic they are used to experiencing, or find interesting, or find exciting because of their social upbringing. They are either looking for someone to fill that sense of security - and that is NOT a relationship based on equal footing and emotional openness. A ("normal") father doesn't cry to his daughter - nor confess his failures. So, she doesn't associate it with Manliness.

What you need to do is to not focus on the sex, you need to focus on a goal for yourself. Who do you want to be, how do you want to be that. And don't let ANYTHING FUCKING GET IN YOUR WAY. Not pussy, not a woman, not a girl. Once you have that settled - then you can deal with woman like an Alpha. Because, women can immediately tell when you are fixated on them as your goal to fulfill yourself and become disgusted by that. Why? See how insecure a woman is? Despite her sense of entitlement, she is deep down insecure and doesn't think she is worthy. So, simple rationality goes "if I'm so shitty, and he wants me to be his goal, then he must be a loser."

They want you to "Frame" the interaction. That means you need to have somewhere to take them. It's a staircase. You need to take each step on the staircase one step at a time. The reward isn't pussy - the reward is self respect.

christiefrontdrive · 2014-02-09T09:15:32+00:00

What keeps me going is easy: I don't want to be remembered as a man who didn't try hard enough.

systmshk · 2014-02-09T12:33:21+00:00

Men do not have "virginity". You've either stuck your dick in a vagina before or not. Women undergo a biological change after the first sexual penetration, therefore virginity is a legitimate term for them. Ascribing virginity to men is a facet of the feminist paradigm.

puaSenator · 2014-02-09T08:01:06+00:00

No offense, and I don't mean this to personally attack you, but you're a textbook example of someone that shouldn't be here. You obviously haven't gotten the foundations under control, nor do you have enough experience to understand the "context" of TRP. Without the experience, and looking from the outside-in, you're going to get confused and frustrated at times.

Seriously, you're not ready for TRP. It's good knowledge, yes, but it's not good "game" for someone at your level. I mean this in all due respect, but you should really go click over to to the seduction sub, get that shit under control, and then six months later come back here. Then all of a sudden most of this stuff will start clicking and make much more sense. What you really need is the context and experience that a message board simply can't provide you.

Then once you've spent yet another 6 months here on TRP, you can click over to /r/alreadyred and start working on your more advanced game.

I think what's most important though is that you look at this as a program of personal growth. Start hitting the gym, buy nice clothes, and keep practicing your game. You'll then be able to look back a year from now as an entirely new man and be proud of what you've become in that short time. But what's matters is actual action. And like I said, you shouldn't be starting here. Hit the gym, and work on your basic game.

If you're going to hamster your way around this, then obviously being lazy is more important to you than actual change.

2014-02-09T06:10:51+00:00

Grasp or swallow?

FinnianWhitefir · 2014-02-09T08:36:15+00:00

I did a bunch of therapy before showing up here. It was hard previously to realize that I was rejecting myself, considered myself worthless, and automatically assumed other people wouldn't want to be around me. I get a hint of that in your post, and suggest that it'd really help you to get used to just communicating with someone. A ton of people are beta because they don't believe they are worth more than they have, and you need to fix that.

CptJackSwallows · 2014-02-09T14:43:39+00:00

I think it must be hard to fully implement the red pill until you have been in a relationship but ways to help would be to look at your female friends and see the hamster work first hand. It is actually astounding that I never noticed before reading the red pill how woman justify things so irrationally.

AnotherBigBrother · 2014-02-09T15:53:51+00:00

A journey of 1,000 miles begins with a single step.

You get to start anew every single day.

Do not focus on your failures. Focus instead on your opportunities.

Find something to improve on and put in the work.

Get off of the internet and computer. Use it as a tool but do not spend too much time here. Turn off your tv. Get rid of your video-game system. Get out there and live life.

Do not make your end goal a relationship.

Find a physical activity you enjoy and step your game up. Lifting is great. I always preferred surfing, mountain biking, jiujitsu, motorcycling. Physical fitness is key. Strength is great but what can you do with it? Find something and get better at it. But if you are gonna lift stick to big compound movements and stop curling in the squat rack.

Find a passion, something that you love and pursue it.

Death is stalking you every single moment. Do not waste another second.

No blaming, complaining or justifying.

Gfresh405 · 2014-02-09T18:55:10+00:00

The biggest thing that actually helped to shape my mentality from blue to red pill was The Manual: What Woman Want and How to Give It to Them. I had actually read it before I discovered The Red Pill subreddit. It's much different from all that PUA bullshit and focuses on a much more direct approach.

It's actually surprisingly well written given its subject written and explains why things have developed the way they have (blue pill, society, etc.). It really is a great read, and I can't recommend it enough. It has helped me more than this sub-reddit ever will.

jacobman · 2014-02-11T05:24:33+00:00

Trying to find the unicorn is like gambling. It's alluring. Think of the payout! Even when you know only 1/100,000,000 win it's hard. You were so close last time!

2014-02-11T13:59:20+00:00

this!

Hyooge · 2014-02-09T12:22:26+00:00

I imagine that because you have that intrinsic desire to find a unicorn, you will give every attractive girl you meet the chance to prove to you whether they are or not, and it is this alone that you feel you can be BP to these girls in the hope they love you for it. Don't think that a "unicorn" is a girl that loves low value males, which gives you an excuse to stay low value. They are just like every other girl. You might be sabotaging your own development.

Stop thinking about or doing this for girls. They are not the end result.

AveofSpades · 2014-02-09T06:13:36+00:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-6Ko13IAuw

ioncehadsexinapool · 2014-02-09T05:47:25+00:00

I agree with OP /r/asktrp is dead. that's why i ask questions here.

Title	The red pill is really hard to grasp
Author	Reallyinthemood
Upvotes	50
Comments	79
Date	February 9, 2014 4:36 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1xettr/the_red_pill_is_really_hard_to_grasp/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/the-red-pill-is-really-hard-to-grasp.11084 https://theredarchive.com/post/11084

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