My youngest will be off to college in the fall. At that time there will be a "come to Jesus" meeting with my wife which I strongly believe will lead to me filing.

I don't want to come off as the "oh poor me guy" but I have tried everything I can in attempts to save the marriage (not that I am perfect but I have been willing to compromise on almost everything). Between an almost non-existent sex/intimacy portion of the marriage for more than 10 years now and a HUGE change in her personality and attitude with age(and menopause) I will not put up with the status quo. I am a Vet and had to spend a lot of time with a counselor to get past some fairly shitty PTSD issues. Her treatment of me just made all of that worse and harder.

That being said, I would like to know what those of you in similar circumstances learned the hard way or wished you had done differently before, during and after the divorce. Like I said, kids are grown so it should only be about dividing assets. My disability is off the table for her and I am reasonable about our joint assets.