Just some advice that worked for me when I knew I was divorcing my ex. Get your own place suitable for your kids. Preferably very close to where they live now. I moved a half mile away. Don’t argue or yell or threaten your spouse at any time if you can help it. Take the bare minimum from your old home to supply your new home. Establish that you will be having the kids over 50% of the time. Sit down and figure it out with your spouse. Every other week, split weeks whatever. Then actually DO IT. Don’t miss days. Don’t not show up. Don’t not drop them off when it’s time. And be flexible to each other’s and your kids needs. When you move out, give her half the money in savings and your checking account. Then open your own account. Always pick up the children on the agreed upon days and keep them as agreed.
I know it sounds simple but it worked for me. Moving far away, not acting by lawyering up if you think she’s going to move away, becoming violent or having screaming matches in front of the kids, all these things WILL fuck you in the end.