How to date properly? Any good book recommendations?

Kurzilla · 2022-09-16T13:06:30+00:00

I've said this before, so maybe it'll resonate with you.

Flirting is just the process of gauging someone's comfort levels in a conversation and teasing the idea of crossing a line.

It takes practice. And it helps to be able to read people, read a room, and have a good understanding of where the line is for that person.

Flirting with strangers takes an inherent confidence that you know how to do all of that - and when done successfully can be very attractive to someone.

Your best flirtation experiences will be with people who already find you somewhat attractive, where you navigate your bearings in the conversation well.

Don't be afraid to laugh at yourself or call yourself out when you feel you fall flat.

Learn from your failures.

What makes flirting "Flirting", is the fact that in doing so, you're inviting the other person to cross the conversation into more taboo subjects that could lead to more interesting conversations and interactions.

So sometimes the best practice for flirting can be watching and listening to how other people around you flirt.

In other words, a book might not be the best starting point for engaging with people. Striking up conversations with other people without the intent of getting them to find you attractive is a wonderful place to start.

Some of the girls I've dated approached me to go out, because they saw how comfortable I was in just working a group and getting laughs. That I was comfortable in my own skin and just navigating a fun conversation with others.

My wife kissed me first, when she tried to poke fun at herself and I leaned into the joke in an endearing way.

Being aware of yourself, and taking care to not be Nice but instead kind and thoughtful, to genuinely not be goal oriented about conversations, is what will carry you into meaningful relationships.

SweelFor- · 2022-09-16T08:26:51+00:00

I don't have book recommendations but I have podcast recommendations, which are free:

https://youtu.be/d04-3YOZV6Q

https://youtu.be/MrGgZTTL6pc

https://youtu.be/-YTVVLssVLI

https://youtu.be/ljuSLYf_yTk

JonF1 · 2022-09-16T15:55:45+00:00

Just go out and be present. Talk and meat people. That's it.

Forget all this red pill, black pill, sigma male, high value this, 80/20 this, it's all an obsession from people who are horrible daters.

Shot-Cellist9635 · 2022-09-16T19:41:57+00:00

My background is in etiquette education, so perhaps too formal for you. Ask the girl at least 3 days in advance and always have a plan to give her, whether it's just coffee, a picnic in the park, or dinner. After the date, if you still want to see her again, call within 24 to tell her you enjoyed the date and will call soon to set up another. Order her food for her with the waiter along with all the other basics. To find compatible girls, join hobbies and meetups that interest you. Stay off dating sites, stats show that the top 25% of girls with the highest self esteem don't online date.

AssistTemporary8422 · 2022-09-16T20:40:50+00:00

I've never found a book that is the ultimate dating guide. You are better off googling questions you have. Dating skills are built on social skills so maybe work on social skills first. Have a social life with both genders.

For dating specifically it helps to be physically attractive. Have the mindset that you have your own standards and want a good partner. So you are evaluating her to see if she is a good match. And of course she is doing the same.

Its best to be chill and fun when dating and not be too needy. Try responding to her body language rather than making dating too directly verbal and logical. Flirt, tease, show intent, be confident, assertive, have some space, don't be overly agreeable, don't be too approval seeking, and make things man to woman rather than platonic.

BondJamesBondx12 · 2022-09-16T13:06:27+00:00

Models by Mark Manson.

Effective_Elk_4719 · 2022-09-17T15:09:29+00:00

Why do you think the red pill is cult? There might be some content creators that express the concepts in a way that is difficult to digest for the average person but that doesn't mean those concepts are any less true. I don't necessarily agree with everything eahh content creator says but there some core concepts that are very important to understand. Two of the most important concepts that TRP talks about is sexual marketplace value (smv) and hypergamy. In order to maximize your dating options you need to maximize your SMV by improving your looks, money, status and game.

Don't believe me? Go create a fake dating profile on bumble with an attractive, jacked, successful man in his prime (around 30-36) and compare the amount of attention and options you get to another profile of you as yourself. You'll quickly understand how real the SMV is. If you're serious about dating check out the following books:

The Way of the Superior Man The Rational Male The Tactical Guide to Women

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Naus1987 · 2022-09-16T16:18:49+00:00

The Nicholas sparks novels are great if you want lovey-dovey romance.

I basically live the Disney/Sparks romance, and I’ve never had a problem dating. Even as a 5’7” guy! My height has never been a problem and I friend zone probably 1-2 women a month.

But you really have to have the personality for gushy romance and poetry. Not for everyone lol!!

Ok-Blacksmith-9418 · 2022-09-16T16:31:59+00:00

Try lifting them up rather than putting them down.

zapadz · 2022-09-21T23:05:43+00:00

Try dating essentials for men by Robert Glover and the tactical guide to women by Shawn t Smith

Title	How to date properly? Any good book recommendations?
Author	DriverUpbeat4750
Upvotes	14
Comments	74
Date	September 16, 2022 8:09 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/xflc0f/how_to_date_properly_any_good_book_recommendations/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/how-to-date-properly-any-good-book-recommendations.1132825 https://theredarchive.com/post/1132825

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