The Importance of Frame

What is Frame?

Frame is the ability to influence reality around you, and dictate terms of your interaction with others. It doesn’t matter if it is with a woman, with your friends, in business or with a stranger you just met. Whose reality is stronger? You want it to be yours.

Agents of Chaos

Women are agents of chaos. Men wreck other people. Women destroy entire societies. They will fuck your shit up. They say they want a loyal man who will treat them good and never cheat.

Bull-Fucking-Shit.

They want fucking Lucifer.

Fuck, even gay serial kiler Jeffrey Dahmer is a sex symbol now, that’s how thirsty bitches are for, well, evil. And trust me, no outlaw biker ever cried in his beer because his girlfriend left him for a Nice Guy.^TM Women try and break you down to see if you really are stronger than they are. Better than they are.

Frame in Business

I negotiate for a living. You had better believe that Frame matters in business, particularly in zero sum transactions like trading. I work more on the retail side, and really, I’d say about 30% of the time I am really protecting the customer from themselves, but still. Plus usually I have a tremendous advantage in knowledge and experience than my counterpart - a couple of years ago I did a deal with a girl who had time to be born, grow up, go to uni, go to law school, pass the bar, and get a job, all while I was working in CorporateLand.

Now, did I rip her pants off? Nope. She’s the rookie lawyer for a big client, and I’m going to see her again, which is reason enough. Some folks “need” to “win” but everyone wants to feel like they were treated fairly. So I explained some things that she might ask for in the deal (that our side didn’t care about giving up) in a way that didn’t make her feel talked down to. And in the past two years, we have done three more deals that have gone smooth as silk.

After a call with a different client, when we were doing the post-mortem (which I highly recommend, particularly on long/complex/difficult deals) the deal maker on our side looked at me and said, ”When he asked about ‘x’, I thought ‘Uh, oh…this one is tough, how is he going to respond to that’, but then you handled it, and it was so smooth the way you did it.” Me: ”I do get paid to do this, you know.” I could blow some more smoke up my own ass, here, but the point is that establishing and maintaining frame is an important skill for success in business.

Establishing Fram With Strangers

This one is more situational, but I will give you a recent example. I was staying in a hotel where a conference was going on. I get on an elevator with a group of people I don’t know and wind up facing a man who was on the phone (I had slid on at the end so was trying to fit) He was apparently negotiating salary – like bro, do that privately, and he happened to be looking down more or less near my hip area. He also stuttered a bit, which drew attention to him: ”How big…how big…how big is the package?”

Me [to the other folks on the elevator]: ”Well that’s a rather personal question.”

Everyone burst out laughing…well except the guy on the phone, who got off on the first stop. I chatted up the other folks a bit, and that was that. The next day one of them came up to me and said, ”OMG that was so funny yesterday” etc. If I had been in their field I would have established some new contacts. I suppose I could have anyway.

Establishing Frame With Women.

You lead, she follows. As I wrote in “High Anxiety”, women want you to lead them. They want to turn off their brains and luxuriate in the feeling that she can relax and that Daddy will take care of everything.

In your relationships with women, Frame is the FOUNDATION of everything. My Frame is what lets me date the way I do. My Frame is the difference between me and the average frustrated chump or the guy married to a fat, bitchy 50 year old wife who has to eat whatever shit sammich she serves up and say “Thank you, honey!” Frame is why I can have a roster of 20-somethings and tell other girls I am fucking other girls. In point of fact I did exactly this earlier in the month, and mentioned it to a couple of girls on my roster...and the uptick in sexy selfies/nudes they sent that week was noticeable, because girls fear being replaced, not cheated on, and they wanted to remind me of their goodies.

Women are, on an evolutionary level, perfectly chill with sharing High Value Men. They would rather have five minutes of Alpha than a lifetime of Beta. They may say that they don’t like it, but they get off on competition anxiety - the most delicious thing to a woman is to be compared favorably to other women.

Do not apologize, do not explain, do not make excuses. Women won’t dump you for banging other girls, they will dump you for being a bitch about it. If you are her best option, she’s going to want to stay.

Make her feel like she is in a romance novel. There’s a reason that “Fifty Shades” was a breakout novel. It appealed to a (literally) untapped market of women who are Desperately Seeking the Wolf. The one thing you cannot do to a woman is bore her. That's why Nice Guys^™ sleep alone.

Takeaways

-Frame is the Foundation of Game.

-The stronger your Frame is, the better your life is.

-Don’t believe their bullshit.

-Never apologize, never explain.

-Live your life how you want it.