I was married for 20+ years and after multiple affairs (hers) I finally divorced my wife. I went through the grieving process and struggled for a bit.

I joined a DR group and made some new friends. One of those was a girl and we kind of hit it off and became close. Nothing happened between us, but she was easy to open up to and we shared a lot. We became each other’s emotional dumping ground which I’m sure isn’t healthy. Unfortunately, she’s moving to the other side of the state and I’m a bummed out because of it.

During the year that I’ve known her I’ve been on quite a few dates with “quality” women but nothing seemed to click for me so I didn’t pursue those opportunities further. I wonder now if my “lack” of motivation to really date any of those women was because I was using my friend as a pseudo girlfriend and that having her may have hamstrung my healing process.

I’ve been trying to be honest with my feelings about this situation and sometimes I’m sad because I think we had a good relationship going. But also, I’m glad that she’s moving because now I don’t have her as a crutch. Does that make sense?