We're in the process of divorce as you all know. My kid doesn't know, but they can see it I think. They were upset about something last night, a sore subject that my stbx and I disagree on. In the past I've had to take my wife's side because we supposedly had to be a team. But that has undermined my relationship with my kid and I'm putting a stop to it.

My kid outright said that if we split up it's their fault because Mommy told them that "you're splitting this family apart" on more than one occasion. I never knew she said that kind of stuff. I'm really disgusted.

Part of me wants to hold off on the split to save my kids sanity. But I also want to get rid of her because I'm disgusted by those kinds of comments. I have to find an effective way to convince my kid that this isn't their fault.

The truth is though, the issues surrounding the kid is a primary cause of our downfall. But it's really about how mom is unable to handle it and how we're unable to agree on solutions, that is the real cause.