An hour ago we finally had The Chat and it went as I'd been expecting for months, it's over. I said I'd be willing to fix it but she's done and I said I wasn't willing to beg or be desperate so it's time to walk away.

I'm 38, she's 30, we'd been together 7 years, married 18 months. Thankfully we don't have kids or a mortgage, just two dogs, and hopefully I'll get those in time. As for now, in a week or I'm planning to move back to my parents for a short while, learning to drive then planning to move to Thailand to be a digital nomad for a few weeks/months, then back home, get flat in my nearest big city where most my friends are (different city from where we are now, which is good in a way).

I feel... weird. Like a big weight has been lifted, currently planning all the admin stuff that needs sorting. Actually feel happier in a way, that I don't have put up with the horrible way she's made me feel for the past year. I don't expect this feeling to last, I think I'll be devastated soon.

I don't hate her or wish her any ill, just want to get away and not have her in my head anymore. I figure I'm lucky in some respects, no kids or serious ties, but I'm also sure it's not going to be an easy ride, judging by the end of my last serious relationship, where I flitted from manic to utterly depressed day by day, hour by hour.

Do you guys have any advice on how to get through this? Any decent books I should read or other words of wisdom? Should I install Tinder immediately or have a bit of time to reflect and grieve? I'm a pretty anxious guy at the best of times, so I'm considering anti-depressants to get through the worst of it but should I see it out for a while?