This situation happened with an ex a few years back but it came to me when reading another post about hamstering and I thought it might be worth a post despite the passage of time since.

Anyway, this chick was 21 years old at the time and of course she was your typical daddy issues/depression/facebook/tumblr addict sort of girl. Piercings, tats, attention whore, blah blah. I was 29 and was both pre-trp and totally pedestalling her based on the (excellent) sex so of course a few months in she was bored and working on lining up her next branch, a fact that was completely known to me (thanks to a friend) and one day I decided to call her on it. Here's how it went:

She had been on her laptop talking to this guy but also doing other things like checking FB, Tumblr, playing web based games, ect. Primarily, though, she was there to talk to her next beta branch. I knew what was up and decided to call her on it because not only was she doing this in my presence, she was putting off plans we had in order to do so.

"So what are you doing on there that's so important, anyway?"

"Nothing, really. FB, etc"

"That it? Nothing else?"

"I don't know, I'm on tumblr and I was talking to my friend Jen for a bit."

"Oh ya, that's cool but you know we have plans, right? There's nothing else keeping you there? I mean, you could easily go on tumblr later, right? There's really nothing else?"

"Why are you grilling me?" (getting angry now)"

5 minutes of repetitive convo later, full of her getting more and more defensive, angry and dramatic and me staying perfectly calm "What about that guy you're talking to?

silence

"In fact, that's primarily what's keeping you on your laptop, correct?"

"No! I am doing other things, I told you and it's nothing anyway, why are you acting like I am lying?"

"So you are talking to a guy, yet you left that out when telling me what you were doing. So now you're not only talking to this guy but you're lying about it. Yet you tell me it's "nothing." Well, why lie if there's nothing to hide?"

"I already said I wasn't lying! What's with you?"

"Do I really have to explain this? You had plans with me, your boyfriend, yet you're sitting there on your laptop talking to some guy, yet when asked what you're doing you tell me you are just talking to Jen, on Tumblr, etc. Basically, everything you were doing, except for, conveniently, the guy you were, and have been, talking to behind my back. You left that part out, but you're not lying?"

"Leaving something out is NOT the same as lying!"

"Not even when that "something" is another guy? Tell me, why did you leave that one specific thing out then, if there's nothing wrong here? Why not tell me? Could it be, oh, I don't know, the fact that you know EXACTLY what you're doing and you are acting like a complete child who got caught with their hand in the cookie jar? Are you seriously trying to pretend that you weren't purposely hiding the fact that you were chatting this guy up behind my back? You just randomly left out one thing and that thing so happened to be the one thing that you knew was wrong, but you did not intend to deceive me. This is your defence?"

At that point she blew up, started yelling at me, calling me names, crying, and then stormed out. An hour later I get a text from a friend of hers asking me why I was accusing her of lying for no reason and letting me know that I hope I know I ruined a good thing.

Kids.