The mental process of a pickme - it’s long but I feel like we have all been her

AutoModerator · 2022-03-23T22:08:35+00:00

[1] - We Just Launched a Website: wwww.TheFemaleDatingStrategy.com. Click here for registration information. Please also join our Twitter and Instagram Pages for updates!
[2] - Listen to The Female Dating Strategy Podcast
[3] - Please read the FDS Handbook and Wiki before commenting. Repeated comments demonstrating lack of basic sub knowledge will result in a temporary or permanent ban.
[4] - Please REPORT any comments that do not follow the sub rules. If you do not report it, the mods will not see it.
[5] - PLEASE REMOVE ALL PERSONAL IDENTIFIABLE INFORMATION from images (Name, Location, Job description, education, phone number, etc). Failure to remove ID info will result in a 1-2 day ban. Repeated failures will result in a permanent ban.
[6] - This sub is FEMALE ONLY. All comments from men will be removed and you will be banned. DO NOT REPLY TO MALE TROLLS!! Please DOWNVOTE and REPORT immediately.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

TAALLY · 2022-03-24T04:36:08+00:00

I started to watch this but couldn't finish. I got about 5 minutes in while reading the comments posted under the video. She is a bombshell at age 38 and (seemingly) still has low self esteem (she calls herself sad) because she isn't attached to a man.

capresesalad1985 · 2022-03-24T13:29:03+00:00

I've watched some of her videos, and I personally I feel as though she constantly outwardly projects her low confidence about her looks, age, lack of romantic prospects, etc. To me she comes across as someone who is not trying to heal, but remain in an embittered state of mind. She focuses on the negative, does nothing for her benefit, gets played, then wonders why she isn't happy.

"At this point I gave up on the idea of us taking it seriously and just enjoy it for what it is. Like I said I'm grown...so I made him food.." So if you're grown why are your standards so incredibly low? Shouldn't grown women expect more than a hookup? Shouldn't grown black women deserve to be wined and dined? I don't feel like she needs a YouTube channel, I feel like she needs therapy. She reminds me of show creator Shonda Rhimes, who I also feel tends to project her insecurities into her shows and speaks similarly in interviews. Again, this is my opinion, and I would never wish hate on her.

MsWriteNow07 · 2022-03-24T02:23:31+00:00

I actually stumbled onto this video the other day. And I wanted to post it here but I didn’t think they want to watch it because it was so long. This woman needs therapy. She is too old to be so goddamn gullible. And honestly there was no synchronicity there. It just reminded me of how much women project their low self-esteem into the stratosphere so that even the dumbest man on earth can see it and use the clues to take advantage of them. As soon as she started talking I can already see what happened. Two seconds into knowing this guy she was spilling her guts and over sharing and he just mirrored back everything she wanted to hear and of course she fell for it. And no matter how much the guy clearly just wanted to use her, she kept fantasizing because she hasn’t dealt with her own issues. Thank God for FDS is all I have to say. While I was never this much of an idiot, I can definitely remember back in the day when I was performing for male attention and approval. It was never as crazy as this, but it was pretty cringe. I thank God that I’ve been delivered or else I would be just where this woman is, only younger.

ETA: And I just want to say that this title is such a misnomer because this isn’t the thought process of a pick me because she was lying the whole way through. Like when she said she decided to have sex with a guy because she wanted to, no expectations. B!tch please. She literally said, “I wasn’t expecting this guy to fall in love with me and want to get married, but I was open to it.” Just another Cool Girl faking the funk. That’s exactly what you hope would happen. And did you catch the part when she said she was in pain the next day? I don’t care if you’ve been celibate for an eon there’s no way that you’re in pain for days from normal sex. This guy was doing some p0rn sick nonsense to her because he knew she would take it. I can’t get too deep into this, I had just calmed myself down from the first time I saw this. Therapy. Now. She needs to run there, today.

capresesalad1985 · 2022-03-23T22:11:45+00:00

I know this is a long one but if you have a long commute and like to listen to story times…this is worth a listen. We have all been her. And there are so many points I want to take her shoulders and tell her to kick this guy out.

There is also an update that is worth a listen where she talks through her decision making and shocker, the dude in question has a model gf of over a year but told her she was just a friend.

spinsterchachkies · 2022-03-24T15:07:42+00:00

Ok. I see her problem. She thought he was the one, in less then a week. Ding ding

I agree about husbands being an elf on the shelf. They aren’t real, like Santa. She’s figuring it out.

MeanWhatISay · 2022-03-24T13:10:55+00:00

She’s stunning. Would have never guessed she’s in her forties!

Girl projected her infatuation on him, read into his reactions a bit too much, created a fantasy world in her heard that this was destiny, then pushed for sex waaay too early. He’s a low-balling, disrespectful douche, but she kind of invited him to exploit her vulnerabilities by over-investing… He just went along. She’s a beautiful soul, but girl needs to take the Disney glasses off… He was not going out of his way to pursue her (she understood this), yet she got mad because her unconscious expectations of him were not met.. Can’t expect a scrote to not scrote 🤷‍♀️

Kingkazola · 2022-03-24T21:54:35+00:00

She desperately needs FDS, I was making these kinds of mistakes with guys at age 20. Even though the whole thing is cringy, I can't help but feel sad for her.

43rdaccount · 2022-03-25T04:26:58+00:00

nooooooooooo </3 </3 </3 this was so sad. where are her girlfriends to protect her from this </3

Title	The mental process of a pickme - it’s long but I feel like we have all been her
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	89
Comments	21
Date	March 23, 2022 10:08 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/tli8f9/the_mental_process_of_a_pickme_its_long_but_i/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/the-mental-process-of-a-pickme-its-long-but-i-feel.1210398 https://theredarchive.com/post/1210398

Comments