What are you reading to up your dad game?

CommanderOfCheese45 · 2023-06-23T16:43:37+00:00

What I read prior to the divorce:

"How to talk so kids will listen and how to listen so kids will talk" by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish. I'd consider this book mandatory reading for parents, period. It's about how to engage cooperation without yelling, threatening, bribing or any of these other terrible parenting practices.

What I read during the divorce process:

"No More Mr. Nice Guy" by Robert Glover. The term "Nice Guy" refers to someone who believes that "acting nice" to someone entitles them to other people doing favors for them, without explicitly asking, and getting upset when the 'invisible agreement' is broken. "I bought you dinner, you owe me sex. I mowed your lawn, you owe me babysitting. I talked nice to you, you owe me a job. I did X hoping for Y but didn't tell you before doing X, so because you didn't give me Y I'm going to throw a huge fit." The book is about how to break that tendency out of your personality, so you can stop being a "nice guy" and be a genuinely nice person, with clear boundaries and expectations and the ability to actually get what you want without being a jackass.

onlyheretolurktoday · 2023-06-23T16:45:11+00:00

My son is 4 and this is my biggest fear. I stayed home with him because I wanted to value this time but she is already doing her thing.

She lied and got an EPO and the three weeks befor the court date she kept telling my son he doesn’t need or miss daddy.

When the judge cancelled the EPO on my son the first things he kept saying to were I don’t miss daddy.

I asked him why he said that and he said it was because mommy keep telling me that. His actions showed different as he wouldn’t leave my side and didn’t want to even go play with friends. But it’s there and it won’t stop.

His preschool teachers won’t even look at me from all the lies she told

upandatom85 · 2023-06-23T23:19:58+00:00

Raising good humans.

How to stop losing your shit with your kids.

No drama discipline.

How to talk so little kids will listen

No More Mr Nice Guy.

The road less traveled.

Feeling good.

And maybe something on stoicism.

Good luck[]

Fluid-Structure2270 · 2023-06-23T20:05:45+00:00

I love the book “Parenting from the Inside Out.” It really makes you work on yourself as a parent. I’d also suggest going to therapy for yourself to make sure you’re the best possible version of yourself you can be. It has helped so much in shaping the way I parent more effectively and compassionately, both my child and myself.

Reflog1791 · 2023-06-23T20:29:12+00:00

Excellent attitude! I found accepting I have zero control of anything in the other household was the key. I can bitch and moan about what I think isn’t right over there or what they say about me, or I can simply let it go and focus exclusively on my household.

Teens and tweens very commonly do not respect their parents. Don’t take it personally. They will come around eventually. In the meantime, love, nurture, discipline, (not corporal punishment), reward, and just run an amazing peaceful safe household.

They will want to be in the drama free zone regardless of what people say about you!

GoldPotential6298 · 2023-06-24T19:33:52+00:00

How to be a good divorced dad. It’s been a few years but I believe it was co-written by a divorce attorney and a therapist

Title	What are you reading to up your dad game?
Author	Extension_Match_8959
Upvotes	7
Comments	10
Date	June 23, 2023 3:37 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/14h1qk7/what_are_you_reading_to_up_your_dad_game/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/what-are-you-reading-to-up-your-dad-game.1223265 https://theredarchive.com/post/1223265

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