Hey all,

I am still married.. want out, but hating the potential nightmare of how bad it may be. Especially cause I know I'll need to dig up tons of papework that I have no idea where its at..where as my STBXW does. Like house stuff, car stuff, dont even know what else.

I have some stock that is vested. We're about out of money (both of us out of jobs right now) and I have a means to sell it at a decent price. It's pre-ipo stock, so its secondary market pricing. Not as good as I'd like, but decent. Looking to sell about 10% to keep us afloat for about 6 months or so. The thing is.. one of my plans was to bargain with my stock to avoid alimony. The FMV of my stock is about $3, strike price $1, and if I am to give her half of what I have vested, I believe I'd be able to "buy her out" using the FMV value. She can't own the stock that I know of.. being pre ipo company. So I believe she'd have to accept FMV or.. not even sure if she can hang on to the vested options (again read somewhere that being pre ipo private company.. only owners/employees could own it, so not sure what that means legally in divorce).

So my concern is if I can sell some at about $8 secondary market, that "lets her know" that they sold for more than FMV. I am unsure of in divorce.. if she can then argue that I sold shares at $8, so why is she only getting the $3 FMV value for it? I dont believe I'd have any obligation to sell her half at $8 (if that were even an option by the time we divorce).

I am also debating using about 1/2 the stock to file and move out. I know she is entitled to half, however we're still married.. so selling some now, and then using it to pay off debt we both would have to split, I think is valid. My lawyer told me that would be OK.. because it is debt we split anyway. But if I were to use it to buy a car, or a house, that would of course look bad. However, I do think I can use it to hire lawyer for divorce and to pay for move out costs.. not sure on this though so hoping someone who has dealt with stock and divorce might know?

Thanks.