It’s been insane lately, I’ll be having nice conversation with a girl about music or films or some topics of interest and we plan a date and probably 80% end up ghosting or flaking off before I’m able to meet them in the flesh.

Even geeky girls with full bios who include their MBTI personality and we bond over some obscure bands or anime or something are likely to ghost when it comes time to arrange a date. Even girls who I’m comparatively quite a lot better looking than. It begs the question … if she isn’t interested in a handsome guy with fun banter (or at least much better than theirs) who shares unique hobbies then who the fuck is she interested in?

And it’s always like a week minimum before they’re free to hang out.

I swear it wasn’t nearly this bad even just a few years ago but I haven’t gotten worse looking and my messaging approach hasn’t changed.

I’m not sure if I should be trying to message every day or allow a few days to go by without messaging, I thought the latter was better unless they’re asking me questions ( which never happens) but I think that may be making things worse.

It seems almost impossible to ‘build value’ over messages too. I’ve tried by sending voice messages and photos of me hiking or doing something cool but whilst it might get them a bit engaged at the time it’s as though when I mention meeting up they get cold feet. It’s Always the ones I’m actually really interested in meeting too ( meanwhile they few who want to meet up are usually ones I’m indifferent about … and I don’t bother meeting people I feel indifferent towards anymore)

Is this just one of the issues with dating apps? It seems to happen with women you meet at bars and clubs too if you try to arrange to see them again since hey can barely remember you … sober daytime events, work and especially social circle are like a cheat code but obviously there just isn’t the same flow of single ladies in these areas.

Then even if the first date goes well there no guarantee you’ll get a second one and so on

It’s easy to forget that it’s supposed to be fun