KINO is HARD.

new_player · 2012-07-03T19:59:34+00:00

Try the escalation ladder. You don't immediately go for grabbing the goods. That's inappropriate. Seriously just start simple. Shoulder tapping. A light hand on her back when you lean in to hear her better or guide her or even when you're pointing something out.

Did you just think of something relevant to the conversation? Do the "oh hey guess what" and as you do that tap them on the arm/thigh with the back of your hand. It's a completely innocent (and acceptable) way to get their attention or heighten the attention, and it builds confidence.

Try it with males first. In fact, it's an awesome way to interact with males in general too. This past weekend I got some staff at Home Depot to give me a huge discount on some power tools and you can bet your ass off I built comfort and camaraderie by simply doing stuff like the arm tap and the back pat.

Hells yeah.

Edit: Also I forgot the high five/fist bump. That shit is canon.

nobody2000 · 2012-07-03T20:35:13+00:00

My major problem with the field reports on seddit is that many almost read like this:

1.) Perform Kino

2.) ???

3.) Profit!

Kino is such a wide concept with a billion examples, that it's frustrating to a noob who's reading a [FR] and comes to "so I performed kino on her..."

Oh good. You performed kino. What did you do, put her in a headlock? Punch her in the gut a bunch of times? I know I'm being crude, but those are technically two forms of kino.

The escalation ladder is a GREAT start. BUT it doesn't capture all the creativity and ideas that many sedditors have come up with in their own kino escalation pursuits.

It would definitely help if more [FR]s just described the kino, what worked and what didn't. Some do, and kudos to them. As for the others, I think they're either lying and don't understand what kino means, or they're just lazy (probably the latter).

ThrowawayPUA · 2012-07-03T20:41:35+00:00

If you think kino is hard, you're overthinking it and making it too hard.

Watch this 10 part video series How To Kino.

n0c0ntr0l · 2012-07-03T20:48:32+00:00

Start with the side of the arm, touch briefly for emphasis on points etc.

Move up to hands, grab hers to lead her places and move onto hand holding.

Keep the eye contact going throughout this (DO NOT LOOK AT WHERE YOU KINO!!!! CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH).

From htere i start moving from short touches to longer ones, like a brush down her arm, or pulling her in and holding her for a second before pushing her gently back (push pull ftw).

justafishinabubble · 2012-07-03T23:43:21+00:00

This video was very informative.. good tips on kino escalation... and, this is from a female redditor.. very fucking smooth.

DevilMirage · 2012-07-03T19:45:03+00:00

Have you ever outed anyone in a public setting for touching you too much? No? Then what's the problem?

Calling someone out on something so benign is basically a social faux-pas, which is why it'll generally never happen.

bigbaker12 · 2012-07-03T20:21:29+00:00

[permanently deleted]

InternetSpaceship · 2012-07-04T06:33:14+00:00

Here's a mindfuck for you - the reason why you Kino is hard for you is because you think it is hard.

I was in your seat. Touching people seemed like such a barrier to break for me. Wholly unnatural. What brought me out of it was starting to touch people (both genders) at work, in a completely non-sexual way.

This "defused" the barrier, and removed the fear of having your kino "called out" or rejected. If there is no agenda, there is no awkwardness.

I then transitioned into doing this all the time. Dude, unless you or the person has deeper issues from your past haunting the sensation, touching feels good. It fosters a bond, it affirms, it soothes and it calms... Or excites, depending on context.

Say it with me: "Touch feels good!"

baaaark · 2012-07-03T20:16:11+00:00

No. It won't ever seem natural at first. You'll probably come across as creepy to the person you first do it to. But once you do it a few times it will start to feel more comfortable.

wahahay · 2012-07-03T22:21:04+00:00

You're the one making it difficult. When you say something to her, touch her hand or side as you would anyone. Then escalate the more IOIs you get.

Xstream2 · 2012-07-04T00:16:24+00:00

simple but effective one is to do high-fives but always slightly squeeze the hand and try to hold it until she pulls away

2012-07-04T00:41:46+00:00

For me, when I'm conversing with a girl I usually spy something she's wearing on her hands like a ring or something and say it's interesting, grab her hand, kind of play with it and ask her about it. When walking with her, just subtly lead her into doors or around corners by the small of her back. In conversation, just be playful! It's hard to describe because it's really like trying to explain an entire new layer of communication. My advice would be to watch movies with guys like Clooney or some other random suave guy and watch how they use touch while communicating.

workingclassredditor · 2012-07-04T02:24:31+00:00

It will feel more natural as long as you start doing it, even by accident or in an unnatural manner. Just relax and let it become an essential part of your everyday interactions. Read the escalation ladder to be aware where and when perform different kinds of kino. Remember: "quick baby steps" (I read this great piece of advice a few days ago here).

Dorman010 · 2012-07-04T06:35:23+00:00

I once read a very interesting analogy about kino - it's much like touching a horse. The idea is to touch, to get the horse used to your touch. Keep touching for too long, and the horse will freak out.

So, how do we apply this? Very simple - a girl usually feels the same things you do while you touch her. If things start feeling awkward, back down for a few moments. If you feel they're getting steamy, or there is no response yet, escalate!

SaggyCheeks · 2012-07-04T08:15:36+00:00

Check out this video. Kino made a lot more sense to me after watching all the parts.

dorkypua · 2012-07-04T09:00:29+00:00

Your making it hard on yourself probably due to the fact that you have socially conditioned yourself to not touch other people (normally so you don't violate their comfort zone). Just get in the habit of trying to be more "touchy" with people in general and you will learn it isn't unnatural or wrong, and kino will become more "natural" because it will be for you!

GreatCornolio · 2012-07-05T13:49:14+00:00

Sorry, I'm new here, but what is kino?

Title	KINO is HARD.
Author	bigbaker12
Upvotes	15
Comments	37
Date	July 3, 2012 7:16 PM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/vzr9r/kino_is_hard/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/kino-is-hard.1306675 https://theredarchive.com/post/1306675

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