How the hell to I try to pick up women without trying to pick up women?

offshore_coppertop · 2010-06-29T19:01:49+00:00

AHA!! You've got it!! Just go into it without seeing them all as targets. When you're dressed appropriately, funny, interesting, and seemingly not interested in them, they instinctively will be more attracted to you to prove themselves.

That's the whole key, at least for me. I never go into a place with the mindset that I'm going to close on the first night -- that way, I'm not pushing for it and things are just way smoother. I often don't even try to number close on the first meet -- I'll see the same girl again in a couple of weeks and then it's way simpler.

Protip: if you have a smartphone, create a list of HB's that you meet in a notepad or something, with relevant information, organized by what you'll remember. I can never remember a name or what we talked about but I'll always remember where we met -- so... I have a list of all the lairs I frequent, and then a listing of staff and HB's that I met there. The entry for each HB has her name, relevant physical details -- height, hair color and length, eye color, piercings, etc., and then a brief summary of what we talked about. Compare the HB reaction between saying, "hey I think we met a couple of weeks ago," to "hey there, we met at that gallery reception a couple of Fridays ago -- you had that necklace on that your friend Tammy gave you when you were in Mexico on vacation. What was your name again?" (you remember the details of where and what you talked about and you throw in the neg of feigning to not remember her name) or "Hey, Ashley, funny bumping into you here, I was just heading over to the Wine Bar" (the place you guys met a few weeks ago). Remember that having the information up front makes you supersmooth because you're confident that it's right since you just checked it on your phone. And if you're checking shit on your phone, she'll assume you're texting, which you can work to your advantage if you're incorporating a time constraint and a potential venue change. ("My friend Tory just left the Uberbar, said the scene was pretty good -- I'm thinking of checking it out. You up to get out of here?")

Be cool, man, be cool.

Sublomino · 2010-06-29T20:27:59+00:00

It's what we call "getting into state." If you read any Tony Robbins or learn some NLP you'll learn all about it. There are some great ways to get back into state, including visualization. Sports coaches use visualization to get their athletes into state so they can perform at their best athletically. Just remember a time when you were in that state where you were turning women on, and vividly imagine the situation in your mind from your own point of view, looking out through your own eyes. As you see that, the feelings will come back and you'll be back in that state!

About noticing IOIs and trying new behaviors... when you first learned to drive, it took all of your attention just to put your feet in the right place, to switch into the right gear, to turn the wheel and check your mirrors, and to notice everything going on around you all at once. It was incredibly hard, you had to keep your conscious attention on everything all at once. Now when you drive, you hardly even notice it all, you've just learned to make all these behaviors unconscious through repetition. Now when you drive it almost happens just automatically, and all you need to focus on is where you're going. Hell, sometimes you even automatically just drive to the wrong place and then you go, fuck, this isn't where I meant to go! Everything's on autopilot. That's how it will be when you're learning a new skill - at first it requires your full conscious attention, but when you get used to it you can just flow with it.

am_i_punk_yet · 2010-06-30T14:35:22+00:00

You think too much. Assume attraction, don't fish for IOI-s. It's on from the get-go, it was on when you first laid your eyes on her and it's a one way trip. Anything else is mostly needless trickery.

2010-06-30T12:19:08+00:00

Just be awesome, they will come to you like moths to a flame. Then you must make them qualify themselves.

The idea is to get past wanting women. Soon enough, you'll see that your desire for women is unimportant. What is far more important, is being the best you that you can be i.e. have a life. Do things that interest you (that are social). Go out often. Travel. Talk to everybody. Always learn new skills.

You'll get there.

frigginAman · 2010-06-30T06:06:51+00:00

Keep doing what you are doing to draw the attention, but think about doing it with "a wink and a nod" towards the target.

muimuine · 2010-07-01T13:34:24+00:00

stop reading the books and just be yourself apparently. you answered your own question.

what is NOT attractive is having a guy pull lines on you from these idiotic books and you can see them a mile away.

Title	How the hell to I try to pick up women without trying to pick up women?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	9
Comments	18
Date	June 29, 2010 6:39 PM UTC (16 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/ck8yq/how_the_hell_to_i_try_to_pick_up_women_without/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-the-hell-to-i-try-to-pick-up-women-without.1310749 https://theredarchive.com/post/1310749

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