It use to be that when I met a girl I really liked, I'd think about the next time that I was going to see them again. A lot. So then I'd focus on it, and days seem like forever. And so I'd try to see them again as soon as possible. However, if we couldn't get together due to scheduling or her flaking, I use to just drive it into the ground just by being too eager and asking her when she's available to get together every chance I get. I figured, better to know for sure, rather than to not know.

After reading seddit, putting the abundance mentality into practice defn helped solve part of my AFC chumpness. However, I would write off any immediate failure as a 'next'. It's true, that mentality helps you get over it and in the right attitude.

However, I've found that recently, despite her flakiness, you might still be in the running somewhere. This is not to give false hope to those that think there might still be some chance after they've been flaked on, and an excuse not to take on the abundance mentality. I'm just saying that you should just play it cool. Sometimes her flaking is not always her rejecting you. She's got other things going on in her life. You do too.

Sometimes we get too anxious and just flail too hard and drive it into the ground. A friend of mine once said to me: "Girls are like squirrels. If you don't make enough movement, they get bored and go away. If you make really big movements, they get scared off. You've got to go 'here squirrely squirrely...' You've got to do the right amount of movement to attract them."

Of the last three FRs I've had, by the end of posting the FR, I thought I had to 'next' the girl. Which was a good mentality, since I didn't have to think about her much. However, since I wasn't burning bridges or driving things into the ground, they've been receptive to trying to get together again, and so far, at their own suggestion.