How do you know when they're just being friendly?

boardinary · 2014-09-23T23:44:32+00:00

It can be difficult to tell sometimes. I think that's why the "assume attraction" line is touted so much here. I can tell you from my experience, I've only regretted not trying. Not saying I haven't had awkward moments when I've misread the situation, but at least I'm not wondering what could have been for eternity.

DaygameCoach · 2014-09-24T00:28:44+00:00

try reading the body language books Superflirt, Superdate, and You Say More Than You Think.

IntensePancakes · 2014-09-24T03:33:54+00:00

People here will tell you to read up on body language. While there is some universal cues, every girl is different. Just being versed in body language will not allow you to know if every girl likes you or not. Some girls have very obvious body language changes when they like someone, and some will hardly ever show it. For that reason, most of the time you should just assume attraction and go for it. Rejection sucks at first, but after a little while you'll start not caring about it.

windowtothesoul · 2014-09-24T02:51:17+00:00

Assume attraction, but body language is key here. Read up on that.

gaia_scienzia · 2014-09-24T03:18:22+00:00

Don't bother assuming they're attracted. You will be wrong about that so often that it isn't worth it, in my view.

Wait for the one's who give unambiguous signals. You might think now that grasping for each attractive girl is a "good strategy", but its an exhausting lifestyle that will burn you out after a year. Most guys who talk it up haven't done it for any length of time. Making a bunch of attempts to get close to people you don't click with is exhausting. So if you're talking about "young men's temporary lifestyle experiments" -- do whatever you want. If you're talking about a strategy you can hold to that will actually last 4+ years, don't do it.

In the absence of effort which you gain from not revving up your "attraction" machinery, you'll be able to read clues more honestly. Most times, nothing is there. And every now and again you get an ace on the river, and then it just works.

Thats real life wisdom though, not pickup advice. I'm not starting a cult nor looking for you to buy a DVD program, so I can afford to be honest.

edbenz · 2014-09-24T06:15:34+00:00

Her job is to either show you signs of interest or neutrality. Rarely will it be signs of disinterest unless she is a stranger. Your job is to gauge whether she is interested, and make your move if you think she is. However, with signals being difficult to decode sometimes, you assume attraction unless you have some damn good reasons why you shouldn't. Like if she says something like "I'm still hung up on my ex and I don't want to go out with you." You push until she gives you that sign of disinterest, sometimes that means going for the kiss and being rejected. Last time, I got the kiss, and then she texted me saying she didn't want to go out. No big deal; I still got the answer.

Title	How do you know when they're just being friendly?
Author	guidegoods
Upvotes	12
Comments	9
Date	September 23, 2014 11:32 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/2ha0pj/how_do_you_know_when_theyre_just_being_friendly/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-you-know-when-theyre-just-being-friendly.1377019 https://theredarchive.com/post/1377019

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