Wall of Text Warning!

I think a lot of this sub focuses on physical aspects of attraction too much, and I'd like to reiterate that that isn't the bulk of attraction. To begin, this is not an excuse to let yourself go physically. Get a haircut, hit the gym, find appropriately fitting clothes, and get your hygiene in check. These are the things that are relatively easy to fix.

With that being said, so much of attraction comes from things outside of physical appearance. A recent personal example: I met a woman who I initially found attractive. After the initial meeting, we exchanged numbers and I tried to set up a time to hang out. Although we decided to meet one night, she cancelled on me within a few hours. For me, that meant it was on her to set things up with me. Sure enough, she set up the next meeting, so we were set to go out on a Friday night. Leading up to hanging out she was overzealous about texting me and when the day came she let me know she was making special arrangements to ditch prior responsibilities just to hang out early, without seeing if I was even available before our arranged time. This was a textbook DLV from her.

When we eventually met up that night (at the pre-arranged time, it was leg day and I'm not cutting my workout short, plus I didn't like that she didn't account for my own prior plans) I was completely in charge of everything. She wanted me to pick the place, me to drive and even for me to decide where to sit. These were also DLVs, showing a low level of confidence. These, paired with the other issues were enough to drop her perceived value in my opinion. Although she was cute, she continually dropped her own value, which destroyed my attraction to her. By the end of the night I took her home, and although she was putting out signals for me to make a move, I wasn't interested.

I hope this hits home for some guys who are battling with the different aspects of attraction. You (as well as the women) have so many aspects of attraction to display and pick up on. Focusing on only one facet neglects the others. Hopefully this'll help some of you guys! Feel free to drop some feedback and get a discussion going!