Someone commented on my Beginner's Guide,

"My problem is that I've seen girls check me out, talking to some attractive ones that sort of like me, but I've never felt a true attraction from one? Is that weird as you said, though that some hot girls probably does like me?"

This is an ambiguity that a lot of guys struggle with. Hell, I STILL struggle with this sometimes.

"Wait, did she just sneak a glance at me? Did I imagine that?"

There is a reason why women are subtle or ambiguous about how they show interest, and it is helpful to know why but it is outside the scope of this post (however I am happy to talk about that, too).

This post is simply focused on how to know if she's REALLY interested or not.

The only way to know is to see for yourself.

Test it.

You think that she checked you out? Go test it out. Approach her.

You think that she sat next to you on the train on purpose? Turn and ask her how her day is going.

You're talking to her but you're not sure if she likes you or is just being polite? Ask her out.

You think she's ready to go home with you? Invite her home.

Yes, as you get better, you better recognize genuine interest, and yes, attraction is on a spectrum (i.e., sometimes she's only interested in spending more time with you, but isn't QUITE ready to go home with you), but, again, the only way to know is to test it by taking ACTION.

Sometimes you ask for too much, sometimes you ask for too little.

Also, there might sometimes be a wild card that's thrown in between you recognizing interest and you approaching (e.g., a friend of hers comes up to her as you approach, and even though she was interested, she's now torn between how her friend sees her and her interest in you).

But this is also part of the process and only clearly understood if you take action. This part of the testing process, action, is immutable.

If you don't try SOMETHING, you won't know. It will be in your head, she'll go away, and that'll be it.

Test your theory.

Reflect on the results.

Try to spot or eliminate lurking variables.

Repeat.

The scientific method, my friends.

Hector