How to stop being so selective?

RaptorMan333 · 2019-10-25T20:51:03+00:00

It seems like you have a weird view of female sexuality. Kind of a Madonna whore thing. I hate to break it to you but girls are extremely sexual and this ideal of a "conservative" girl that you have in your head is just not true. These "pure" girls like to be fucked by dominant men just as much as "hoes" and they can and have let random men stick their cocks in them whenever they feel like it. And they enjoyed it. Try to avoid labeling girls as "hoes". Often the "nice", "religious" girl is more promiscuous and sexual than the girl who you label as a "hoe" just because she makes out with her friend at the club to get attention. Often the girl who dresses a bit more modestly is far more of a sexual freak than the one who dresses like a "hoe" as you say.

You say that you're not using it as an excuse but you have to be honest with yourself. You said you "would have" kissed them, but that has no meaning because you didn't. You're acting like THINKING of kiss closing them is the same thing as f-closing them. One is much easier than the other.

You're having self defeating thoughts and passing judgment on people you know almost nothing about. You're saying these girls are not "good enough" for you but you haven't even given them a chance. Just because a girl wants to get drunk and makeout with someone in a club doesn't mean she isn't loyal or interesting or ethical or anything else. It really sounds like you're making excuses for not taking action. It's very easy to look at a 10/10 and go "oh well she probably doesn't have any cool hobbies so I'm not going to approach or escalate" even though YOU HAVENT EVEN FUCKING TALKED TO HER YET. One of my absolute best friends has this mentality. He tries to come off as very picky, and uses it as an excuse for not approaching 8's and 9's but he can't even pull average looking girls, or even really talk to them.

I'm not sure what you want. Is your game really so fucking solid that you can effortlessly bang 10's, but you just choose not to? That's normally not the case. Just escalate. Why would you not escalate if getting these 8-10's is as easy as you say? You don't want sex with hot girls?

FrankyCastiglione · 2019-10-25T18:11:53+00:00

Being selective demonstrates higher value, which women do and like. When you express interest but then move on, it makes them chase.

It makes you the prize, not her. Which is ideal.

rich_god · 2019-10-26T02:14:38+00:00

Don’t try to put people into boxes. You’re not selective, you’re building excuses for not finding the right person. There is only one selection criteria : how much are you attracted to that person ?

Then you can analyze that and realise that so far the people that attracted you have this or this trait. For example I know I’m attracted to some very specific physical traits, but I will select a girl according those traits. I just ask myself « how do I feel toward this girl ? »

So stop finding excuses, connect to people for who they are and not the projections you have of them and stop forbidding yourself to feel attraction.

need_seafood · 2019-10-25T21:39:39+00:00

Do you have any hobbies? If not, get one (or more). Try to match the things you're interested in and where you think the type of girls you like hang out e.g. a choir

justahappyidiot · 2019-10-26T23:10:26+00:00

After reading through all of these comments and replies, I think you are looking for a trophy. You want a girl to hold up and say, "look! she's perfect! And she was only interested in me! And I had to work for it!"

You're defining your own value based on your perceived value of her. OR because it'll be your first time you want her to be completely perfect.

And the way you are valuing women makes you sound like a little boy.

"She kissed me right away" - so? Kissing is fun. Maybe she does that all the time, or maybe she felt a connection with you and decided to go for it. Or maybe she was just extra horny that night.

You're running around judging everyone, meanwhile you're still a virgin.

Sex is a totally normal and healthy part of being a human. It's also one of the best parts. It's this super big deal to you, but to a lot of people it's not that big of a deal. It doesn't require love or a deep bond. Just two horny humans.

YES, sex is better with connection and Love. And I'm not personally a fan of one night stands unless the chemistry is great, but sometimes it's fun to just fuck. Especially when you're younger and it's still new.

Just have fun man

How to stop being so selective?

THE TEXT IS NOT NECESSARY FOR CONTEXT OF THE QUESTION

Comments

Title	How to stop being so selective?
Author	CaraDeBatata
Upvotes	4
Comments	28
Date	October 25, 2019 5:54 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/dn13gm/how_to_stop_being_so_selective/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-stop-being-so-selective.1482141 https://theredarchive.com/post/1482141