How do you deal with losing hope?

fuzzymonkeylimbo · 2020-09-22T07:23:42+00:00

Start going to counseling, work on building your self-worth through activities you know are challenging but also rewarding, and when you think something negative about yourself tell yourself no. Negate the thought with the truth. If you need to Pavlov yourself, wear a rubberband and snap yourself enough to hurt whenever you have one of those thoughts to remind you that the voice which breaks you down is a liar. The one that makes you feel bad? Anxiety and Depression, possibly other harms too. Do not listen to them. You have worth. And when they monsters in your mind tell you that you aren't enough, laugh in their stupid fucking faces and do it anyway! Yes, being rejected hurts, but at least you tried. If you never try, you have already failed. You are not a failure. You just need to channel Heath Ledger in 10 Things I Hate About You during the stadium scene. Do not take notes from romance movies. If you need notes, I have some books for you, and a couple movies. And remember, being their friend can be more rewarding than just dating without that understanding.

fanfanye · 2020-09-22T10:32:24+00:00

I deal with it by loving myself

I take care of myself, not to be more attractive to girls, but for me to just look in the mirror and say "damn that's a handsome guy"

Girls may not agree about that statement.(hell girls even comment on my long hair saying i looked better with short hair)

but who cares, the only main character in this world is yourself, and thus the only person you need to love/be loved by is yourself

Things will always hurt when relationships doesn't work... But your life isn't a dating sim, it's an RPG, there are more things to do other than just chasing the girl.

We're all gonna make it brah - Zyzz

kaleog3 · 2020-09-22T16:00:07+00:00

With the right perspective! You can either throw in the towel now or do what i did. So you don't think you're attractive enough you know you're gonna fail? Great! you literally have nothing to lose so you might as well try everything because you literally can't get any consequence. What is a girl gonna turn you down, get offended, give you a disgusted look or treat you like shit? Who cares? You weren't gonna get her anyway and she'll be gone out of your life as fast as you approaching her. She wasn't in your life before that and won't be tomorrow so she might as well be your guinea pig. If nothing else this literally the best situation for a guy to be in to get some practice in because this is the only time mistakes don't matter. So just do it. Treat it like training for the day you'll get all the chances.

Liberaler · 2020-09-22T10:30:39+00:00

Don't look at the results too much. View it as an adventure. Every failure teaches you something and therefore is a win in itself. The universe does not conspire against you. If you move forward and overcome your obstacles success is inevitable. Have a mindset that allows you to enjoy the process and not just the results.

Maybe you are also to a certain extent not unhappy, because of not being successful with women, but you are not successful with women because you are unhappy. Remind yourself that you can find happiness without a woman in your life.

oiiOllie · 2020-09-22T18:17:30+00:00

Stop caring what the world or people think or have to say. Because everyone has an opinion some are quality while others are garbage, take what agrees with who you are and discard the rest. Have a life. Have hobbies that you like doing. start small have friends you can talk to or family. Go out in nature and read books and gain knowledge on something, find people with similar interests and discuss what you’re into. Love yourself. Do your bed. Brush your teeth and wash your body, take care of your body as well as your mind, get a job. Rome wasn’t built in one day. Everything takes time and it’s okay to lose hope once and again but as long as you have a big goal that you’re working on it’s easy to find yourself coming back to optimism. Take it easy one day at a time

SexCoachSarah · 2020-09-22T12:18:34+00:00

The first thing to do is to get in touch with your desire. What do you want? It's not enough to know what you don't want - like "I don't want to be alone" - you need to know what you do want when it comes to sex and relationships.

Say you say "I want a girlfriend" or "I want a friend with benefits" - why?

What do you look forward to experiencing with someone? What would you want to share with them?

Worrying about your looks, to an extent, is kind of like an excuse, though I entirely understand the concern. What it does is keeps you focused on all the reasons why you can't and all the reasons why you'll wind up with what you don't want. To be frank - there are all kinds of people who look all kinds of ways and who have banging sex lives.

You also need to take action. A sense of worthiness won't come to you through other people - you have to give it to yourself. You prove you are worthy by taking action every single day in service of your good - get enough sleep, hydrate, move your body, dress the way you would dress if you were going on a date with someone.

It will be years and years only if you keep doing what you have always done.

Bierdopje420 · 2020-09-22T14:26:11+00:00

I'm also a little lost when it comes to finding a nice person to love recently. Being a little autistic and dealing with its anxieties doesn't make it better sadly.

I kinda started focussing on my own appearance for myself instead of others (including my behaviour). I'd rather be happy with myself and alone than being a fake c*nt people like psychiatrists want me to be.

Focus on work, friends, your hobbies and from my understanding you"ll find someone. I know it sounds cheesy but live has its twists and turns, good and bad. For instance, maybe you"ll find your perfect person while doing your favourite activity like working out or something.

This may take long but why would you rush in to something or someone to fail after a short time because it isn't real?

This is my advice. But remember I'm autistic, so my social skills aren't the best lol.

I wish you the best of luck with dealing with your troubles and I hope you run in to someone when you totally don't expect it :)

swardhan · 2020-09-22T15:36:27+00:00

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superman11000 · 2020-09-22T13:47:37+00:00

Its simple actually, if you wanna win theres many ways not just one, if you really want to be more attractive try getting rich, i know its hard but just by being rich you will be 100 times more attracyive to a girl than even models.

Title	How do you deal with losing hope?
Author	CuteNeanderthalGF
Upvotes	21
Comments	26
Date	September 22, 2020 7:13 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/ixiolj/how_do_you_deal_with_losing_hope/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-you-deal-with-losing-hope.1502599 https://theredarchive.com/post/1502599

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