Does looks matter when in comes to dating women? Answer below!

revente · 2021-01-16T01:31:02+00:00

I disagree about being chatty and extroverted. Yeah it's nice to have an energetic introduction and then go completely chill and still score. Actually much of the time it helps to shut up and just listen to the girl, just being comfortable to take action when needed.

asiandawgshy · 2021-01-16T00:46:23+00:00

Thank you for the Ted talk !!

SaltMiner_ · 2021-01-16T01:53:59+00:00

Women are not sexually aroused in the same way as guys. They are not aroused by visuals alone. They are attracted to powerful personality and presence and leadership.

What a bunch of Blue Pill nonsense. Looks are not the ONLY thing that attracts a women, sure, but they are by far the most important thing. To suggest otherwise just stinks of mental masturbation and fails the common sense test. Go outside and observe some couples. 99% of them 'looks match'. If the guy is a 7, his girl will be between 6-8, and vice versa.

This kind of 'looks don't matter' belief is the same crap that pua's used to peddle to guys who are 4's to make them think that they can get 10's. If you're not a good looking guy just accept that you'll never get with a good looking woman (without money) and just aim for a girl who is a 4. At least you'll be with someone.

Gladladriel · 2021-01-19T11:27:54+00:00

As a woman... Yes of course it matters! Lol. We all want someone we're attracted to. However attraction depends on plenty of other factors. If they're ugly on the inside that's no good. And if they're a gem of a human, that shines through and we'll be more attracted. I think it's similar for men and women in that way. That said, beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.

earsurgery9 · 2021-01-16T16:07:10+00:00

Whenever I read ''Looks aren't everything, they only get your foot in the door!'', I think to myself ''So surely that means they ARE everything! Without getting your foot in the door (since she isn't attracted to you) you never stand a chance in the first place!'' lol

It always strikes me as a bizarre admission for people trying to prove that point - kinda killing their own argument stone dead lol

DybbukTX · 2021-01-16T16:46:44+00:00

Looks matter less to women than men, of course, but they still matter a lot. Looks are the only thing that gave me any positive results at all with women when I was younger, when I suffered from being a clueless nervous weirdo.

Head-Language-2977 · 2021-01-18T21:32:57+00:00

Looks are very important! I like to think of courtship as applying for a job.

Your looks are your resume and the first date is your job interview. No matter how great of a worker you are, your not going to ever get the call for a job interview unless the company likes your resume. Only after your hired will your personality will become important.

OnlyPlaysPaladins · 2021-01-16T05:39:04+00:00

Height, then looks, then charisma/chillness, then status, in that order.

MakeSail · 2021-01-16T04:10:26+00:00

Is there anything specific you would like to know in relation to what Leo said?

Leo is perhaps not as detailed as he should be in using terms to understand an outcome. He seems a bit disjointed in cause and effect. Let's dig a little deeper a paragraph at a time. Please forgive the use of generalities, I am just using Leo's context.

Women are not sexually aroused in the same way as guys. They are not aroused by visuals alone. They are attracted to powerful personality and presence and leadership. They are attracted when the guy is good at pumping up her emotional state and making her feel like a girl. Women are emotional creatures. A photo of the biggest dick in the world will not make her excited. You must pump up her emotional state first. The silent James Bond approach will not get you laid. You must be chatty, playful, and extroverted. You need to play with her.

Women show initial attraction IRL based on looks and nonverbal ques. You can understand much about someone based on body language, but not leadership, and what exactly is a powerful personality, not really sure? You can detect presence through body language, for example being confident.
But I would agree that women will probably not get sexually aroused by visuals alone. I think arousal will come during conversation in making an emotional connection, establishing trust and playfully touching.
What exactly is the James Bond approach? How would this apply to real life? Not really sure.

I do agree that, depending on the woman, who she is as a person, and her state of mind, you should consider taking her on an emotional journey, and you can do this through play.

What you might do will depend on who she is. So, you must identify her needs and evaluate her state of mind before forming a strategy of how to act.

Also, remember strategy evolves based on her feedback in real-time. Emotional connection is an evolving process, you are not following a script. The important point is you don't really know what you will do ahead of time, that is be chatty, playful, or extroverted, it depends on who she is and what she wants.

Not really sure what "pump up her emotional state" means. I understand how to invoke feelings and emotions, but I view it more as discovery and identification rather than amplifying something specific. I think perhaps the end goal of increasing desire is what is meant.

Your looks are a great advantage -- they get your foot in the door -- but getting your foot in the door is NOT closing. Learning to close makes or breaks your whole lay count. If you are good-looking but have no clue how to close, you'll get laid less then ugly guys who know how to close.

I find the PUA word "close" much too vague to be useful. I would say to get to the point of intimacy you first have to forge and emotional connection, establish trust, and then escalate towards sex. It's also interesting that nothing is said about conversation or empathy skills.

I am going to group together and comment on the remainder of the paragraphs.

Right now it's like you own a Ferrari but have no clue how to drive. The Ferrari is a fast car that will beat a Toyota, but if I know how to drive my Toyota and you have no clue how to drive your Ferrari, I will beat you every time.

If you want to understand what turns on women, go to Walmart and buy a romance novel. Read it. That's is porn for women. Women are turned on mentally, not visually.

Also... attraction is also not seduction. You can get attraction pretty easy but then you must lay on the seduction until she's horny. A women does not get horny instantly like a guy. You need to guide her into it and manage all the logistics so sex can happen. You absolutely cannot count on women to handle the logistics. Learning to handle logistics like a champ is the #1 key to getting laid consistently.

It's the logistics, stupid ;)

All game boils down to two things: playful leading. Everything else is an unpacking of those two things. If you can't be playful and you can't lead, your game sucks, and so your chances of getting laid become extremely low.

I think beyond initial attraction women are turned on by mate value attributes. Even in conversation, a lot of the communication is nonverbal, and largely evaluated using instinct or intuition.
I don't think you can get attraction pretty easy. As a man you must understand what makes you look attractive to women and polish this presentation. I would agree attraction is not seduction. For me seduction is a higher level technique based on emotional connection.
I do find PUA advice puzzling from the standpoint that men are so obsessed with sex they will screw anything that walks. This is nonsense. I have to understand who she is and what she wants (needs) before I decide what I may want for myself, which may be nothing more than a conversation.
Logistics are important. I think the message here is the man should take the lead in setting up the dates and being proactive in escalating towards sex. A part of logistics is understanding women's needs for safety; physical, social and emotional.
So what is my problem with all of the PUA terminology? It's too vague to be useful, its like catching smoke. There is no detailed plan, just a basic direction which is useful in being directionless, or at least unaccountable.

If the OP could be more specific in what he was looking for I could target my remarks.

Edit: Fixing formatting.

SnooCookies2794 · 2021-01-16T05:46:47+00:00

I agree with you.

Good advice.

Gloomy-Jicama · 2021-01-18T22:19:27+00:00

Yes women care about how you look. WTF is this. If you are having trouble with women the FIRST thing you should look at is how you look.

Title	Does looks matter when in comes to dating women? Answer below!
Author	sussso
Upvotes	19
Comments	21
Date	January 16, 2021 12:44 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/ky856c/does_looks_matter_when_in_comes_to_dating_women/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/does-looks-matter-when-in-comes-to-dating-women.1508555 https://theredarchive.com/post/1508555

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