Attachment to a person

probable-deniability · 2024-04-23T06:50:41+00:00

Really all you can do is keep being your best awesome self. The same thing that attracted a woman will usually keep working. If you are the prize, then you know a smart woman sticks around. And a dummy will leave. And you don't want a dummy.

BuyerOfCoins · 2024-04-23T07:11:30+00:00

Yes I have. You have to meet more women because your perception of this girl is that she’s perfect, an angel. Maybe she is your soulmate but the way you talk makes me think that this is the first girl you’re with. Also makes me think you value her more than yourself and that you’re unworthy (in your eyes) and that you, for some reason, need her in your life to be happy.

Realize that you’re worthy of having a good time with this girl. That your time on this earth is limited and that you can be happy by yourself. Once you learn to be happy by yourself you realize you don’t necessarily need someone in your life, but it’s (very) nice to have.

ROBYoutube · 2024-04-23T06:04:01+00:00

Yeah. Most people experience this, but they're less honest about it. Hence, a lot of advice is how to 'control' 'your woman' so that they behave themselves and don't leave you because that would make you feel bad (the biggest crime on earth, to the individual).

Obviously that is lunatic shit for people who want to go to prison. Autonomous humans will do what they do. Sometimes, your life and their life line up and you both decide that you'd like to do life together. But just as fast, your lives can diverge and in spite of the love you've built over the good times, sometimes you just have to accept it and move on. That's life man.

You can worry about it all you want. You can learn manipulation and control tactics til you are blue in the face. But you will never, ever stop life from doing whatever life will do. Namaste or whatever.

IGetBoredSometimes23 · 2024-04-23T08:08:52+00:00

Sounds like you have what we in polyamory circles call New Relationship Energy. It's when you just start dating some and you become infatuated.

Only real way to get over the anxiety is to talk to her and see how she feels about you. If she feels the same way, great. If not, at least you know and don't have to be afraid anymore.

TRTGymBro1 · 2024-04-23T10:37:15+00:00

Of course. But you need to get over the fear of you want to truly have success with women. Women sense when a man is afraid of losing them and it will always kill their attraction....sooner or later. Try this. Tell her that you need to go on a business trip for a week and don't call her at all. Hell, don't even make up a trip. Just don't call her for a week. Or, make a date and then cancel it on the day of. Start practicing doing the things you are afraid of. Spend less time with her and be a little less attentive and interested.

Only when you overcome the fear of losing someone and the fear of being alone/single will you have true power in the mating game. Until then, you will always surrender your power to the next pretty thing that enters your life.

Ok-Shock8867 · 2024-04-24T13:32:06+00:00

If you aren't experiencing this, you probably don't like her that much. I've felt this way with every girl that I've wanted to be serious with.

EXTREMELY common feelings. Ironically the state of anxiety ends up pushing women away - you end up acting safe, boring, walking on eggshells. Many women are attracted to a man who is assertive, risky, bold.

You can't really get rid of that, even if you meet other women. I don't buy the one-itis talk from PUA communities - no matter how many women I talk to, there's always one particular woman I end up feeling this way about.

The key is to embrace the fact that you are a little bit afraid of losing her, but you're also just going to do you. Live your life, do cool shit, let your normal personality shine through even if it could be disagreeable to her. Resist the urge to try to control or manage who she spends time with. If not for moral reasons, then simply because that level of insecurity will always kill the connection faster than anything else you can do. Every man wants a woman that's choosing, willingly, to be with them - not through some control tactic.

When I was really young and getting into dating, I used to get ideas like "well, I'll make sure we're doing something every day so she has less opportunity to meet other guys." Just don't. Now, if a girl wants to go, I let her go and make sure that I'm someone she'll always remember as one of the better people in her life. Your focus should always just be on being the best version of yourself so a woman wants to stay around you - which actually doesn't involve neutering your personality or walking on eggshells around her.

Available_Bass9725 · 2024-04-23T07:56:46+00:00

Remember that women never attach to men. Best we can do is replicate their mating strategy.

Title	Attachment to a person
Author	blaubarschbube27
Upvotes	7
Comments	14
Date	April 23, 2024 5:59 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1cax7ya/attachment_to_a_person/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/attachment-to-a-person.1516096 https://theredarchive.com/post/1516096

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