So tired

feminazis_stalk_me · 2015-08-03T12:37:33+00:00

You are not your job. Or your place of residence. Or your fucking earthly possessions. You can lose all that shit tomorrow and work your ass off building it back up again. You can walk away from all that shit and be no less a man for it. Will your woman stay with you through that? Eh. Probably not. But that's besides the point.

It sounds like you just plain and simple don't look good on paper yet. I was a shitty student when I was a kid - smart as fuck, but I was lazy. I didn't realize what you're just now finding out the hard way - it's not what you know, it's how well you can jump through hoops and get the shiny gold stars and certificates that let others know what you know.

If that job you want is really what will make you happy, then step back, take a breath and examine what it will take to get there. Get a game plan. Figure out what you need to get certified, qualified and look good on paper. Give yourself a time-line and chop it into easy to digest bite-sized chunks. Do some night classes if you need to. Take an internship. Do what you need to, even if it means living rough for a bit and taking another job that lets you work toward your ideal job.

Sometimes you have to sacrifice to get to a bigger end game. Willpower is ignoring what you want right now to get what you really want.

AFPJ · 2015-08-03T18:00:39+00:00

ITT: OP externalizes his happiness & wonders why he is unhappy.

Lift, meditate, sleep well, eat well, practice meditation and stoicism.

To find purpose in your life you must first find solace in yourself.

_smosbol_ · 2015-08-03T12:32:12+00:00

I was in a terrible place mentally for the last 4 months or so. Only the last couple of weeks things cleared up a little. What worked for me were eating healthy and plentiful, because I noticed I was undereating due to stress which made me even feel more miserable. Decent sleep does wonders for your mental health. Whenever you feel like your mind is starting to drift and you feel like you're about to say or do things that will put you in a worse position, take a long walk to set things straight.

cmiovino · 2015-08-03T12:39:05+00:00

I used the 'plow through' method when faced with something similar.

Back around January/February, it's stressful time in finance/accounting. We have to file these huge reports to the state for the year and it was my first time doing them. I had nothing to look off of as my business unit was new. There are also no instructions.

Additionally, we had to close the books and have other reporting, as well as our normal duties. The lady I was teaching to do my weekly billing bailed and went to Florida after I took 6 weeks to train her. Also, I was coming out of a 3 year LTR breakup.

I felt completely focusing on me and not women or dating at this time massively helped. I'd suggest this for you because you need to have a career, be centered/grounded, and have an abundant life before even thinking of dating.

Two, if the role is leading no where, start putting in applications. It's a long and hard process, but without moving around to a company or role you remotely enjoy, you won't have success or grow. Don't follow what your parents request, follow what you want.

I'd also suggest not opening up to your girlfriend about the work issues. You'll come across as this unstable, ungrounded person, not on his path in life. Get a male friend and have a beer with them. Rant about it. Just don't get your girl involved. You can certainly let her know you're looking for a new job though - this is positive and shows you're improving your life.

smokingmonkey420 · 2015-08-03T23:01:23+00:00

Meditation. 20 mins. a day. Works wonders.

tuxedoburrito · 2015-08-03T15:06:04+00:00

It sounds like you have a victim mentality. You take some responsibility but think about it this way.

You are in control of your life.

You are not qualified for the position you want because of your choices. Your parents are trying to help you out. Maybe you should retake some of those classes, get better grades or learn new skills. Perhaps you just need to be more presentable. Check out How to Win Friends & Influence People. I bet a lot of communication especially in interviews can be learned by reading this.

Work on yourself. No one wants to hire an employee who is depressed. You've heard of eat, pray love? Well start doing this: Eat. Read. Lift. Focus on having a higher quality of life and make the changes where you see you need to make them. Your life is up to you, not those around you.

NidStyles · 2015-08-03T19:34:28+00:00

Step one: read everyone else's comments about you being you.

Step two: If you want to break into investment research, you need to start consulting on the side. (You need to get certified for this.) There is literally no other way around it if you don't have "friends" in the target firm already. You need to prove that you can do it yourself without someone holding your hand.

Step three: build a respectable portfolio for yourself. No 401K or any easy mode investing for you, if you want to break into that field, you have to be willing to buy and sell what you recommend yourself. You are literally going to be selling your thoughts and opinions, and you have to display that confidence. You basically will have to be able to open your portfolio and show potential employers how well you are doing with your own personal investing.

Step four: Get the fuck away from your parents already. If you live with them, move the fuck out already. If you go to see them, or talk to them on the phones so much, cut it back. Make your time about you, not worrying about them or what they think. Basically, you're an adult now, time to start taking care of yourself first.

You are not mentally unstable. You just need to cut the bullshit out of your life and get headed towards your career goals.

Title	So tired
Author	mazikeenwantsme
Upvotes	7
Comments	16
Date	August 3, 2015 11:42 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3fly5g/so_tired/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/so-tired.151917 https://theredarchive.com/post/151917

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