Post divorce trying to get along with loved ones

Strict-Front-2375 · 2024-05-25T14:54:53+00:00

Definitely get worse treatment being a divorced guy, sadly. It's like how I got better treatment being 'married' status with strangers, even if they knew nothing about me but I had a wife.

AirSailer · 2024-05-24T02:04:44+00:00

I get that feeling a lot. My life is going well, but I seem less tolerant of other people and challenges seem harder and more frequent now that I'm on my own. Now it's up to only me to deal with this stuff, so it makes sense that the things seem harder because there's a lack of support there. That being said now I don't have to deal with the negative behavior and influence of my ex-wife.

As for how others treat me, I'd say that guys typically are understanding of what I went through, and are generally supportive. That being said, I don't talk to many guys about being divorced, but when I find out some guys I know is divorced we usually swap stories and walk away with a newfound respect for each other.

Women on the other hand look at me like I'm a fucking demon. All they see is a man who fucked over an innocent and perfect women, which I absolutely didn't. My married friend's wives (mostly) won't allow their husbands to hang out with me anymore, and I don't blame them because I don't mince words (anymore) and the women can't handle that and think I'm a bad influence on their husbands. Maybe I am, because I live a better life than most of them. For example, they (my friends) complain about not getting any sexual-anything from their wives in months/years, I tell them to get a toy, they tell me their wives won't let them, I ask if their wives have toys, they say yes, then I tell them how that's a fucking double standard and they take that back to their wives and the wives get fucking pissed, at me! My friends know I'm not interested in dating or sex; well I guess somebody told the women that because I had two of their wives confront me one night and tell me to stay away from their husbands. Apparently they think I'm gay because the only reason a man won't have sex with a woman is because he's gay, and they thought I was attracted to their husbands. Women are fucking vicious. Give me a bear over a woman any day.

Joocewayne · 2024-05-23T23:30:10+00:00

I also feel some of what you’re talking about. People do sometimes assume a lot of untrue things about divorced men. It is par for the course. All we can do is deeply know who we are and make choices that reflect that, so we are impervious to the judgment and scorn of the ignorant. I remember times when I was married and heard about someone getting a divorce. I wondered about the ins and outs of it and made a lot of wrong assumptions. Having been through a wife filing and all that ensued, I have learned a lot about how the “official story” is nine times out of ten a fabricated coverup narrated by the wife.

Few people even approach the man to offer support or ask him anything about what happened. The ex wives on the other hand are encircled by “supporters” and nosey Nellie’s and they have free rein to craft a backstory.

Remember, no woman will EVER tolerate being the villain in her own story.

cubssux · 2024-05-23T23:22:06+00:00

Your stressing and on the edge more then you know.

crager34 · 2024-05-23T22:26:09+00:00

Part of the process of healing. Don't be a dick to anyone, just realize you might not be the best company right now. Alone time is healing time. Find that person that she married again. It could take awhile, but be honest with yourself.

Get to work.

Comfortable-Angle660 · 2024-05-23T19:54:28+00:00

Are you sure this is happening, or is your depression altering your perception? Have a trusted individual give their input.

That said, I have cut off friendships from my previous life, sometimes it is necessary.

Title	Post divorce trying to get along with loved ones
Author	LuvDonkeeButts
Upvotes	7
Comments	8
Date	May 23, 2024 6:43 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1cz09ov/post_divorce_trying_to_get_along_with_loved_ones/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/post-divorce-trying-to-get-along-with-loved-ones.1519320 https://theredarchive.com/post/1519320

Comments