Part rant / part advice.

I first want to start out saying this is my second post in Divorce_Men and, my Kings, you guys are awesome. The overwhelming support, ideas, and advice was amazing on my first post. The gratitude that dozens of strangers took a few minutes out of their day to help a stranger was pretty cool. This is a good group of dudes.

OK, now that I got the mushy stuff out of the way, Here's my rant and question, if I may.

RANT: I caught my soon to be ex-wife having an emotional affair. During this discovery I found out she was also doing and buying illegal steroids from her affair partner. She's one of those bikini body builders and it has absolutely wrecked our marriage. Nothing but eating chicken and broccoli out of trays every meal, no date nights, no drinks, does nothing but eat, lift, food prep, and go to shows and practices while I raise our 3 kids. And THOUSANDS of $$$ (boob job, clothes, supplements, drugs, travel, tanning, +++) each year to support her "sport." Her reason for cheating was me not being supportive enough, like cheer leader supportive. Great job, honey. Which is true. After 4 years of this, I started to build resentment because I was living like a single dad (laundry, dishes, cleaning, yard work & raising kids) and flipping the bill. Now I know that lifestyle, I'd rather have a good woman that has a little extra to love than ever date someone involved in that again. Anyway, I digress.

I make almost twice what she does, she cheated, and of course she is going for alimony, go figure, I have a lot of evidence of the drug deals (and emotional affair) and she is still doing the drugs. She's going to shacking up with her new boy-toy in a few weeks when she moves out. It's amazing that she would choose this lifestyle over her family.

She's going to have a wake up call having to deal with everything 50% now.

QUESTION: Has anyone been through anything like this and could the emotional affair and drug use evidence effect/reduce alimony payments? With the drug use I feel like I could get the upper hand with the kids with custody, but I don't want to put the kids through a custody battle and I think 50/50 is best for them, unless I hear about needles laying around or something.

I'm in UT, 3 kids, married 17 years. UT is a no-fault state.