Any tips on how to Become the Confident, Social Guy Everyone Wants to Be Around at School? This can lead to seduction

gutenshmeis · 2024-08-30T16:03:36+00:00

How many people can actually achieve this? IMO, you either "have it" or you don't.

Honestly, trying to be liked by everyone is an exhausting and extremely self-compromising goal.

You're better off learning how to be comfortable and confident in your own skin. There is nothing wrong with being introverted or reserved. How many people do you meet in a day that actually stimulate you? Unless you have an innate talent of being able to relate to most people, and get genuine enjoyment out of doing so, you're just going to be miserable.

BXtherapist · 2024-08-30T11:35:30+00:00

You have to present "value" and plant seeds..

It's a guy at my gym who EVERYONE goes to before they even start THINKING about equipment..

Bro is a GENUINELY good guy who takes Obama laps around the gym speaking to men and women

So essentially, a simple 3 second conversation is a seed planted that can sprout into something more..

From_God_to_Dog · 2024-08-30T11:50:52+00:00

Talk to everyone shortly with the idea of spreading positivity...and try ur hardest to never be moody

TheHouseSomalian · 2024-08-30T11:02:12+00:00

Begin by liking yourself.

DaygameCode · 2024-08-30T17:20:58+00:00

As a coach I can tell you that you cannot fake it because you have insecurities that girls and other people will easily test you on, for example what if girls in your school say:

Isn’t it weird that you talk to us?
Sorry i don’t go out with guys like you.
You are not my type.
Ew, not interested
In your dreams buddy.
Have you seen yourself in the mirror?
You are such a weirdo

These are typical things girls in a a school could say to you, putting social pressure as everyone will evaluate your reaction to determine your worth, and no matter how much you try to fake being confident they will shatter you because you don’t know how to handle that, or what to say or do when they say that.

Not only that, but your anxiety prevents you from faking it because you will have doubts on how to approach, how to fit in, and your mindset will be trying to get approval from strangers which increases anxiety because you don’t know what you have to do to get their approval.

This often can lead you to trying too hard, trying to be something you are not or simply not daring to engage in social situations.

Confidence requires experience in dealing with complex social situations and also full self-acceptance of your own shortcomings or flaws to be able to manage the situation when women test you on those flaws or shortcomings.

Some guys have that natural talent, because they were raised right, you weren’t raised in an effective way to have that natural instinct and therefore have to learn.

And learning requires practice and also probably guidance and support (which you can get for free here) because otherwise you are going absolutely blind and lack of emotional support will make you give up.

No-Preference8767 · 2024-09-01T23:26:50+00:00

You need to find ways to bring out the cool in other people and make them feel special. It doesn't have to be genuine but you should try to include quiet people and learn more about them . You can practice on almost anybody on campus. try starting a conversation and try to find out 3 unique things about the person. Once you are good at doing that you can bring the dynamic to group conversations and look for ways to include peoples interests in the convo. It could be as simple as noticing somebody give a ton of details about dinosaurs so you try to relate something said to dinosaurs or archeology.
You need to develop a system that can give you a cool response in most situations. You want to be a singles hitter and not a homerun hitter. ( Maybe a doubled hitter is more apt but I don't think that's a real thing ) Your not necessarily trying to say something funny all the time but something interesting is the goal with less mistakes. Mistakes will happen though inevitably.
Learning to banter is surprisingly a female trait and Alot if guys don't know how to do it well.

The best resource to learn what types of things to say are podcasts. Comedian Led podcasts might be a lil too unrealistic for the average person but podcasts where the cohosts know each other and know their specific humor work best

The best way to learn common talking points and responses is eavesdropping. Listen to a conversation for 4 to 6 sentences, then try to come up with a slightly provacative response for one of the people. Or a more insightful digging deep response. Or a more validating response. You'll figure out what a Convo needs after gaining experience.

But boring small talk will happen . It's good sometimes . It's easy. people like it for a reason. Don't get too hung up on shining the brightest all the time every Convo.

Immediate_Lion8516 · 2024-08-30T17:07:01+00:00

Talk to everyone the same. Women can tell when you’re only talking with them because you want sex, they feel objectified.

TripleDigitNomad · 2024-08-30T11:16:01+00:00

What really helped me was spending a year abroad in Europe, basically getting out of my comfort zone and being forced to start over for a year. With all the theory I had studied prior to that, it was just a matter of putting it into practice which was easier to do in a new place as opposed to the same place I was always struggling in.

Title	Any tips on how to Become the Confident, Social Guy Everyone Wants to Be Around at School? This can lead to seduction
Author	AdRight390
Upvotes	1
Comments	24
Date	August 30, 2024 10:56 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1f4sbrl/any_tips_on_how_to_become_the_confident_social/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/any-tips-on-how-to-become-the-confident-social-guy.1528849 https://theredarchive.com/post/1528849

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