My stbx and I got married about 2y ago. 7 months ago she asked me to divorce - we've been separated since, and filed in December.

During our separation we kept seeing each other, talking, etc. About a month ago, I moved back to family as I'm dealing with a lot of shit in life right now (financially, emotionally and professionally, and recently also health issues).

About two weeks ago, she asked me "hypothetically" what I'd feel if she started dating. I told her it would break me, as we haven't drawn a clear line and continued to keep our relationship alive even once we filed.

Now we're two weeks later, and she has taken a lot of space. Every time we've interacted it's been tense, and incredibly hurtful. And then today I told her it makes me feel like our marriage is now fully over, to which she just texted "Yes".

I asked to have a further conversation on the phone to just understand what's going on, so I can start grieving. She's told me it's not a priority until Saturday and told me I'm rude for asking to speak earlier.

I can't figure out how to understand what the hell is going on, or even how to start processing. Everything in my life - even outside of the divorce - is just falling apart, and I don't feel like I can start grieving and healing until I at least understand what's changed now.

Has anyone been here? What would you advise? And how can I start just ending the spiral.

Before anyone says, I know the advice about going to the gym and working out and having a vibrant life - I just physically don't have the time or the health right now to come around to that until things professionally come to a better place.