I was in an airport the other day and overheard an older gentlemen talking to (who I believed) may have been his granddaughter.

She said something like she wants to get married. Sounded like she was talking about someone specific. The man basically asked her- does she want to get married or does she want to become a wife? Obviously, that sparked some interesting dialog.

I thought that was really profound. When we say “I want to get married”, it has the feel of obtaining or possessing something. Like, I want to get a new car or I want to get a new dress or I want to get a house.

When we say “we want to become a wife”, it means we want to grow or transform and be someone we are not today. It’s facing into the fact that, through marriage, you will be someone different, someone better, someone more fulfilled.

It bothers me when people struggling in marriage say they lost their identities and who they were. Duh. It’s like they figured they would get a party, a ring, and piece of paper and they will just go one being who they are.

This applies to both men and women.

Thoughts?