Hey guys,
I wanted to get some honest advice because I feel a bit stuck in this area.
So usually when I go out, I tend to have a few drinks just to loosen up a bit. I mostly go to places with latin music, and I try to use dancing as my “thing”. I feel like that part actually works sometimes, I can get a girl to dance, there’s some vibe, some connection, maybe even a bit of attraction. But then… when it comes to actually talking, everything kind of falls apart.
I struggle to keep a solid conversation going and it feels like I lose their attention pretty quickly, or I just don’t know how to transition from dancing to something more engaging. It’s like I don’t have a structure in my head, and I end up either saying random stuff or going blank.
A bit about me, I'm on my early 30s, I have a decent shape (I train regularly), I think I’m generally a good communicator (just not in this flirting context), I’m aware I’m not a good looking guy, so it's pretty obvious I need to compensate more with my vibe/personality.
The main issue is that when I’m talking to women, I get this mix of social anxiety plus pressure to “make it work”, and it kind of blocks me.
I’ve been watching some content about daygame, and I see there’s usually some kind of structure there (opener - small talk - connection - etc.), whifh makes sense to me.
But, how does that look like in a club setting?
Does anyone have a simple structure that "works" in nightlife?
Like: - How to start conversation/opener? - How do you transition from dancing to conversation? - What kind of things do you say early on? - How do you keep the interaction engaging instead of it dying after 1–2 minutes?
If you could break it down into steps and maybe give a few example lines or directions, that would be super helpful.
I’m trying to actually practice this next time I go out.
Appreciate any advice
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