Having been in and out of this community for longer than I care to admit. I see the same kinds of guys over and over again.

The goal of this post is to give you a reality check on what's actually happening here.

I got into this community with two main goals. I wanted to fuck more hot girls and I wanted to be in a position where I knew I could attract enough girls that I liked so I could make my own decisions. Take a moment and think about what your goals are and if the action you are currently undertaking is getting you anywhere closer to those goals.

Forget about that one girl

She doesn't like you and probably isn't even that hot anyway. There's a reason why it's the number 1 rule on here. It's not about her and once you get good enough at this to get her, you probably won't even want her anyway. As soon as you make this about one girl, you're not going anywhere, you may as well pack up and go home. The girl that brings you here isn't the girl that keeps you here. We all have one. Mine was a girl I went to school with and she just wasn't interested in me, I spent years trying to weasel my way in somehow but it never worked. Saw her a few years ago and I really wouldn't give her a second look these days. Some girls just don't like you.

You will have to forge your own path

If you look at the guys who are good at this, you'll notice something. Yes, there is a general template to this but they have each put their own stamp on things. That means you have to go out there, be innovative and try new things. No dude, guru or scammer can tell you how to actually do this for you. You have too many unique circumstances, they can guide you, motivate you and give you ideas but you can't delegate the responsibility. I would put the ratio at 20% advice etc and then 80% action and putting things into practice. If you hit those ratios, you will improve. The problem is for most guys it's the other way around which brings me to the next point.

Get out there into the world

If you're out there just consuming content all the time, you are not living life. You are watching somebody else live it. You cannot get good at this by reading everything on the topic, in fact it will probably make you worse because you'll be too in your head about it. It's like learning how to swim by reading a book. You jump in the water try freestyle, backstroke and butterfly because you read about it online, drown and just say it doesn't work. You are better off taking things step by step, breaking it down and being consistent with it. I think the best formula is go out and do something to meet girls and fail. Then go and read something and tweak your behaviour. Rinse and repeat.

I would say that if you have been reading this stuff and haven't taken action in over a month. Just forget it all and do something else. If you want results, you need to take action and if you don't take action, you are just torturing yourself. And yes, even if it's the "there's just one thing I need to do before I'm ready excuse", it's still a weasel and counts. Stop reading this stuff until it's sorted out and you're ready.

Consistency will win

Once you have taken action, you need to get the reps in and be able to continue even when you're failing. That's the really hard part. Continuing when you don't have success and going in blind faith. Just think is there someone out there who has got good at anything without being consistent? It will also mean you need to manage your emotional state, you will have ups and downs, times when you are more of less motivated. You'll have long dark nights of the soul but you will need to be able to pick yourself up from it because it is worth it. I've had nights where I've been staying at friend's houses whilst they've been banging girls in the other room and just had to listen to it. I've also been on the other side of that situation. Consistency will put the offs in your favour.

Realistic expectations

We are all limited in some form or another. Recognise those limits. It's a balance between dreaming big enough that you push yourself and being realistic enough that you don't expect to be banging the hottest girls in the world. I can tell you what those expectations should be but in general I would say two stages up from where you are now is good depending on your goal.

An example would be a virgin wanting to sleep with girls. I would say a good target would be one new girl every couple of months if you want to have more variety or a girlfriend if that's more your goal. That's not unrealistic and a good improvement. Not everyone has to be doing crazy numbers or even wants to.

Work out what you're good at

Just spam what works for you. There are no prizes for "perfect game" or whatever, that's just other guys trying to hamstring you mentally. If someone is saying that you shouldn't do something for any reason and it doesn't quite make sense to you, be skeptical and try it yourself. But read between the lines here, that means you really do need to go out there and try everything.

Leave

The community will eventually sap your energy but it will still be here in some form or another. Take what you need from it and leave. Think of it like a river or a stream, go down and have a drink when you need it then go about your life. The community will snatch your soul at some point, you need to recognise when it's got into your vibe so much you end up on a downward spiral. You can stick around longer if you don't consistently consume trashy content. Stay away from the drama, find something that works for you and go outside and try it.

Life is best when you live it.