dating for looks vs personality.

Reddit View
December 29, 2018

Where is that sweet spot for looks vs personality in dating? This is with a red pilled lense on managing the relationship of course. you see my dilemma and that of many of my friends is this: at our age group, there are very few traditional/ conservative and basically high-quality girls whom would be worth a LTR with left.

now yes, we could just fuck around and plate randoms, who cares about vetting them. But once that gets old, say for the hypothetical you considered a relationship for the time being. Well my options seem to be sluts who are proud their sluts, sluts who are clearly sluts and lie about it, and girls who are ambiguous about their past/ N count or their pasts/ mental status make them undatable or *shudder* feminists..

so I ask, to what extent should we guys take into account a personality that gels well with ours, (feminine, obedient, tolerable to be around lol) vs straight up looks? obviously finding both is ideal, but would you give say a solid 6 a chance, what about a 5 with all the traits you look for in a woman? interested to hear opinions on this.

Edit/Update: Thanks for the replies, quite a few made me laugh even, they were just such blunt truths. I think i underplayed my SMV a little, i dont really care what it is, im 21 and in shape, If I see something I like I usually give it a shot. I was just curious to hear from an older crowd some opinions on this topic, its helped so thanks.

Post Information
Title dating for looks vs personality.
Author Tom_Bryantkobe_Brady
Upvotes 9
Comments 21
Date 29 December 2018 08:01 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Original Link
Similar Posts

Red Pill terms found in post:
long term relationshipplatesexual market valuefeministn count

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red11 points12 points  (1 child) | Copy


They better fuck on the first date if they want date two.

Beyond that, I look for personality and their own stability. To many women see me and see $$. So that gets old.

But I know their game.

Fucked em all bro. 10’s and 1’s. Yep I fucked a 1.

Sample everything on the buffet.

Go back for seconds on what YOU want. How will you know what that is if you dont sample?

Being Chad helps the selection process.

Its like fishing with dynamite.

Fat chicks suck the best dick. 10’s give the best starfish.

Its a sliding scale.

[–]Kpwn880 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Fat chicks suck the best dick.

That's because they're hungry and it looks like a big, fat sausage to them.

[–]BostonBrakeJob5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy

You done took the pussy off the pedestal and put it right back up on a spreadsheet.

[–]mrssmithhh0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Seems like the best way to find a good match, tbh. Screen objectively before you get emotionally or physically involved. It would help keep your head clear and to find someone who would actually bring value to your life.

Also, looks fade, for everyone. I would say that at the end of that day, a 5 who is a lovely person would bring more happiness to your life than a 8-10 who wrecks it. Character is wayyyy more attractive over the long term than a pretty face or hot body.

[–]BostonBrakeJob0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I think you missed my point.

You and OP should spend more time in the grey.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Vetting takes time.

Up your game. SMV. Others will introduce them to you out of respect of your SMV It’s intrinsic female code.

Fucking kid you not, I was dating and vetting when I was steared to mine by a plate. Plate actually told me she found someone better for me since she knew I wouldn’t settle for her

You are in control of this. Don’t settle. Their are a lot of unhappy women out there of great stock. It took me 8 years of fucking around and vetting. A couple of LTRs of what I didn’t want

It’s all about “frame.”

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMod / Red Beret3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Look son, if you're only attracting fives you have a lot of work to do. Get in shape, get attractive, and stop being a faggot.

You want attractive, she has to more than pass the boner test. You also want her to be interested in you, pleasant to be around, a good cook, and all those other things that are important.

Don't settle for fives. And give up the video gaming. Now get to work.

[–]alpha-zach2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

You prob won’t listen but the best advice is to wait til 30 before worrying about LTR. Being past 30 I’ve converted many feminists and sluts to traditional values. If you have the frame they’ll become whatever you want in time.

Side note, I don’t know how you quantify the numbers and your Smv. But I wouldn’t touch a 5 with a ten foot pole. A mentally confident man’s SMV is already so high that unless he’s grotesquely overweight, 4’ tall, or homeless he never need mess with anything below a 7. And even a 10’s personality will mold into whatever you want if your SMV is high enough.

[–]Kpwn881 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you have the frame they’ll become whatever you want in time.

This is what I'm constantly drilling into the skulls of these youngsters that seem to have a ridiculous notion they'll find a "quality" girl at a church or library. Church girls are the biggest sluts and the "naughty librarian" meme is real.

Your best bet for a LTR is by growing your social circle and being introduced through friends. It shows social proof, let's the relationship form naturally after you start fooling around, and because you two will know you mutual friends she will be a lot less inclined to act shitty toward you over something stupid.

[–]robertwservice19743 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

“Well my options seem to be . . .”

You have an option problem. Get better options.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–]SepeanRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Avoid red flags, other than that go for looks.

[–]shneakypete2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

Definitely subjective. A common fallacy is guys think a pretty girl has a terrible personality and ugly girls have excellent personalities. I actually performed a test when I was in high school. I was friends with two girls: a 9 and a 4. I messaged both of them on AIM with the exact same open and I proceeded to have a conversation with both of them, using the same inputs on both when possible. The girl with the 9 was definitely more entertaining, sharper, and wittier than the ugly girl.

That being said, I think to some extent you need to shoot around whatever you see yourself as for the sake of stability. If you are a 7 in looks, personality, intelligence, and money, you need to shoot for a girl around that level. If you bag a 9 and you try to LTR her, her ability to monkey branch to a better dude is way too high. If you get a 7 then she will probably feel like she's in a good spot and she won't want to to leave. On the opposite side of that if you're a 7 and you LTR a 5 you'll be tempted to leave because you could always do better.

[–]The_LitzRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I found something similar. Good looking girls seem to be used to the attention and they are pretty OI. Their fat sisters are less so, and sometimes just downright abrasive. They are on the defensive whenever a dude shows interest.

[–]Tbonesupreme2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Ugly women have good reason to be miserable.

[–]shneakypete1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yep. Girl I know used to be good looking. A solid 7 I'd say. Definitely an alpha widow. Used to being cute and getting asked out and hit on. She graduated college and shot up management. She's making a ton of money and is severely depressed. With the stress she's under she's probably gained 75-100lbs. She's absolutely miserable. All the guys she used to shoot down left and right won't even look her way anymore. To be happy she needs to find a guy who makes 100k a year, looks like the guys she was used to in college, and likes fat ugly chicks. She's fucked.

[–]Terminal-Psychosis2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

As the old song goes... "Get an ugly girl to marry you."

Not even that is a guarantee, mind you, but increases the chances.

They must be made aware that life is better with you, than without you.

That is the key.

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy



[–]The_LitzRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

OP, you want to date for value added to your life. If a girl adds no value to your life what is the use of dating her?

You don't mention your age, but it sounds like you are still young and you are worried you won't sow your wild oats since you now have a crush on a girl that is not so good looking.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Plate for looks and change the place you go to pick up chicks. Change out bars for cafes, special interest groups, or even church if you're religious. If you want LTR potential, you're less likely to find it at the club.

Promote and demote plates accordingly.

[–]coachdad80 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You don't need lots of great women, you only need one. Mistake some guys make is the statement, "there arent any good women out there" implying the masses of women are not suitable to their standards never realizing that's ok since they only need to find one that fits the bill.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2021. All rights reserved.

created by /u/dream-hunter